Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About dudeitsdanny : My name's Daniel. I'm a pokemon obsessed, Zelda obsessed, music loving nerd. I'm picky, but open-minded. I'm smart, but sometimes I act like a complete idiot =) I'm a sucker for love. I love Disney, particularly Toy Story. There's so much to me that I can't fit on here, really.. I TRY to reply to messages, but sometimes I don't get the chance: I'm mostly on from my iPod, so it's not as easy as it is from a computer. I'm pretty funny, but I'm also sweet and pretty laid back. Give me enough of a chance, and you won't be disappointed.
Look for me on Twitter (@dudeitsdanny), I'm more likely to reply there.. And I follow back, cause I haven't deluded myself into thinking I'm hot shit ;P
And, just to clear this up for the idiots concerned with it.. I used to like to moderate FMLs, and if I saw a good one with terrible grammar, spelling, or badly formatted, I would fix them and post them.
That's why I have so many unapproved FMLs.
Sad that so many people are so concerned.
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, I was running the track at my school. My crush of two years was running in front of me, so I decided to catch up and finally talk to her. When I caught up, the only thing I could think to say was, "What's your name?" even though I already knew. She replied, "Natalie". Her name is Melissa. FML
Today, my mother asked me if I'd heard of anal sex. Before I could fully process her question, she explained that it's dangerous because the tissues of the anus are finer and more susceptible to STDs. There were still forty minutes left in our car ride. FML
Today, I took my 15 year old daughter driving. I yelled at her for not going safely around corners. On the way home, while demonstrating how to drive right, I went around a corner and hit a cement truck. FML
Today, I was at a bar talking to a very attractive young woman. I began to see that she wanted me as she pulled closer and closer. Eventually she pulled me in and licked my ear lobe sensually. She then said, "I wanna break your collar bone." in a seductive tone. FML
Today, I was masturbating in the dark with the door open. I thought I saw a figure outside my door, because I didn't have my glasses on. After intensely staring at the dark figure for about a minute, thinking it was my imagination, my stepdad said, "you know, I am looking RIGHT at you," FML
Thursday 11 September 2014