duckman9

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Offline (the 09/16/2016 at 10:27am)

duckman9

19Fucked!

duckman9duckman9
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 7 June 1985 (31 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4526
  • Number of comments : 136
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 27 posted

About duckman9 : I may be schizophrenic, but at least I have each other, and when I am alone I am together.
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Sex is like poker: If you don't have a partner you better have a really strong hand.
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Internationally Renowned Expert at life-de-suckification
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I'm in love with my bed, we're perfect for each other, but the alarm clock just doesn't seem to want us together. Jealous whore!

I dare you to message me :P

duckman9's page activity

Visits<b>galactic_FP</b> - the 08/28/2016 at 5:44pm<b>Exodiafinder687</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 10:51am<b>Romanchuk</b> - the 06/22/2016 at 3:38am<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 06/17/2016 at 7:39am<b>TheBlackMagister</b> - the 06/15/2016 at 4:25pm<b>sazbotter</b> - the 06/15/2016 at 3:05am<b>slapstick1982</b> - the 06/13/2016 at 11:32pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 9:16am<b>runsen</b> - the 06/07/2016 at 4:00pm<b>Tehlu</b> - the 06/05/2016 at 2:42pm<b>leish180</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 8:44am<b>AO2015</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 11:56pm<b>DjLitterBox</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 8:24am<b>jackroarrr</b> - the 05/14/2016 at 12:15pm<b>demix</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 7:03am<b>Cbnotme</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 8:58pm<b>SexyCheeksIzKool</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 8:04pm<b>thatone2066</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 1:07pm

Fucked!<b>sazbotter</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 12:24pm<b>Exodiafinder687</b> - the 06/03/2016 at 9:28pm<b>AO2015</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 5:53am<b>DjLitterBox</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 2:24pm<b>fmlperson8264</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 6:19am<b>Cbnotme</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 1:16pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 03/27/2016 at 11:51pm<b>Frozen_Flames</b> - the 03/24/2016 at 4:50pm<b>thenewrockarmy</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 12:14am<b>Duhitstori</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 5:21pm<b>delilablue95</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 11:09pm<b>False_Stupidity</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 10:28pm<b>Hop6e</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 10:00pm<b>apineapple</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 1:03am<b>deick</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 6:27pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 3:59pm<b>Lesser</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 11:27am<b>LiquidFantasy</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 8:50am

duckman9's FML badges

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duckman9's favorite FMLs

Today, my six year old told me I have a big nose. When I told her that she hurt my feelings, she laughed and said "Don't be silly mummy, ugly people don't have feelings." FML

by uglywoman / 12/14/2010 at 3:21am / Australia (Queensland) / Kids

Today, my six year old told me I have a big nose. When I told her that she hurt my feelings, she laughed and said "Don't be silly mummy, ugly people don't have feelings." FML

by uglywoman / 12/14/2010 at 3:21am / Australia (Queensland) / Kids

Today, I told my parents that I wanted a little brother. My dad apparently thought it would be funny to tell me that my mom just swallowed my little brother. FML

by Anonymous / 11/13/2010 at 2:14am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I told my parents that I wanted a little brother. My dad apparently thought it would be funny to tell me that my mom just swallowed my little brother. FML

by Anonymous / 11/13/2010 at 2:14am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was on a bench enjoying the sun, when a guy comes and sits next to me. Next thing I know, he lets out a loud fart, then looks my way with pride. I stare back in shock. He then says to me, "Yeah, that just happened," and walks off. FML

by flying13 / 11/03/2010 at 3:27am / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was on a bench enjoying the sun, when a guy comes and sits next to me. Next thing I know, he lets out a loud fart, then looks my way with pride. I stare back in shock. He then says to me, "Yeah, that just happened," and walks off. FML

by flying13 / 11/03/2010 at 3:27am / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that whilst I was asleep last night, my boyfriend was playing on his XBox. I also found out that whenever he unlocked a new level, achievement or just generally beat someone's ass, he would celebrate by pulling out one of his pubes and putting it in my mouth. FML

by doesnttastegood / 02/01/2010 at 5:23am / United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that whilst I was asleep last night, my boyfriend was playing on his XBox. I also found out that whenever he unlocked a new level, achievement or just generally beat someone's ass, he would celebrate by pulling out one of his pubes and putting it in my mouth. FML

by doesnttastegood / 02/01/2010 at 5:23am / United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went out with my family and boyfriend for dinner. We were all having a good time, and suddenly at the end of dinner he decides to kneel down on one knee, take out an engagement ring, and say "I choose you, Pikachu," with a straight face. He was serious. FML

by mandy / 09/04/2009 at 10:19pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I went out with my family and boyfriend for dinner. We were all having a good time, and suddenly at the end of dinner he decides to kneel down on one knee, take out an engagement ring, and say "I choose you, Pikachu," with a straight face. He was serious. FML

by mandy / 09/04/2009 at 10:19pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I saw a video of myself filmed last night, hammered, climbing my wardrobe screaming, "I WANT TO GO TO NARNIA" while naked. FML

by ShiriSarah / 08/20/2009 at 10:39am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on his couch when suddenly I tried to get up. Before I could stand, he grabs onto me and says, "I'm a koala and you're my eucalyptus tree!" He then continued to latch onto me for a good five minutes pretending to eat my hair. FML

by treegirl / 07/26/2009 at 1:57am / United States / Love

Today, my five year old daughter was watching cartoons on TV. Then a Barbie commercial came on. My daughter sang along with the theme song "Be who you want to be, B-A-R-B-I-E." She then turned to me and said "Mom, I want to be a hooker." FML

by ....... / 06/23/2009 at 1:56pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML

by I_Am_The_Edge / 06/11/2009 at 12:06pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML

by badmom / 06/10/2009 at 2:09pm / Canada (Quebec) / Intimacy