dspadres

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dspadres

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 4 October 1984 (31 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 42992
  • Number of comments : 213
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About dspadres : I'm a recent college grad. I majored in Theater Studies to become a playwright/screenwriter...so therefore I'm also unemployed.

dspadres's page activity

Visits<b>yellow33</b> - the 01/19/2016 at 9:29pm<b>ninety</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 11:18pm<b>Envy22</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 6:10pm<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 6:42pm<b>youdumbstick</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 10:12am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 9:05am<b>Burberryhype</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 11:49pm<b>laxer98</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 5:11am<b>lizbill</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 9:56pm<b>aishah77</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 5:29pm<b>misjell94</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 4:26pm<b>tori3700</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 2:09am<b>cottoncandylips</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 3:31am<b>pandora_star</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 3:04am<b>kelseysking</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 2:02am<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 7:01pm<b>farmgirl_ih</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 11:36pm<b>DefiantGirl</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 6:47pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 3:05pm<b>cottoncandylips</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 9:31am

dspadres's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

dspadres's favorite FMLs

Today, not wanting to be known as a lightweight anymore, I started drinking with some guy friends. After one beer I ended up in bed with one of them who kindly put my bra back on for me after, as I was too sloshed. I'm no longer known as lightweight, but instead, the slutty drunk. FML

by Permafucked / 05/12/2009 at 10:23am / United States (South Dakota) / Love

Today, I decided I didn't care about my pride, and so I asked this girl out in a text. After an hour of no response I asked again. Later I got a text saying, "I'm sorry, This is Emily's mom. Emily isn't here at the moment, but if I were you, I wouldn't ask again." I was rejected by her mom. FML

by ConnorFails / 05/11/2009 at 9:25pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, I realized what my mom has been calling me for 20 years. She always calls me her "little fehler." With her being from Germany, I always thought it was a cute little nickname. Apparently, she's been calling me her "little mistake." FML

by mistake / 05/11/2009 at 5:09am / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at a family get together with distant relatives. My grandma made a point to say how all of the grandkids brought their boyfriends or girlfriends. She looks at me, then turns to everyone and says "But not our Becky! She is more interested in her cats right now than finding a man." FML

by Anonymous / 05/07/2009 at 11:38pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, my wife of three years asked me to meet her for lunch at Subway. When I arrived, she was standing in the parking lot. She handed me a footlong sub, said "I got you a turkey sandwich" and followed it up with "And I'm leaving you." FML

by Joey / 05/07/2009 at 6:39pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I was eating at a restaurant patio with a few friends. After the waitress cleaned up our table there was a drop of mayonnaise on the table. I wiped it with my finger and licked it. It wasn’t mayo, it was bird shit. FML

by MJ3105 / 05/07/2009 at 7:36am / Israel / Animals

Today, I stopped at a red light. I noticed the car in front of me had the reverse lights on. I thought to myself "Meh, that person must know. They wouldn't do that." The light turned green. Turns out they didn't. Nor did they have insurance. FML

by jezusflowers / 05/06/2009 at 10:26pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Transportation

Today, I got a call from my child's preschool saying that "Mindy keeps saying she sits on her daddy's lap and plays with his peter." My daughter meant 'puter, as in computer. Now the school is worried my husband is a child molester. FML

by Gumfanatic302 / 05/06/2009 at 9:43pm / United States (Nevada) / Kids

Today, I had some pretty bad stomach pain, so I went to the bathroom. After a few minutes, two girls walked in, taking stalls next to me. That's when my farts began to get very large and explosive. Not only did they break into laughter, they waited for me to come out. FML

by Anonymous / 05/06/2009 at 3:17pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I pissed my younger brother off. Seemingly unrelated to this was the fact that I left my laptop on in my room along with MSN signed into my email adress. Now, all my contacts know that I apparently "just love the warm feeling of semen sliding down my throat". FML

by Anonymous / 05/05/2009 at 5:42pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was masturbating in the dark with the door open. I thought I saw a figure outside my door, because I didn't have my glasses on. After intensely staring at the dark figure for about a minute, thinking it was my imagination, my stepdad said, "you know, I am looking RIGHT at you," FML

by danggit3290 / 05/03/2009 at 1:17pm / United States (California) / Intimacy