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drunk_in_love

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drunk_in_love

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4965
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About drunk_in_love : I'm a hipster. I hate ignorant people.

drunk_in_love's page activity

Visits<b>Sarahch</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 3:27pm<b>CoGhostRider</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 3:24pm<b>meli1195</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 6:03am<b>stinkyslinky</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 12:01pm<b>daniellemshine</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 11:31pm<b>MNBOY16</b> - the 04/04/2014 at 9:26pm

drunk_in_love's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of drunk_in_love's badges

drunk_in_love's favorite FMLs

Today, I kept getting out of bed because I was sure my daughter had pooped in her diaper. Every time, I found nothing. I finally figured out the foul smell was my husband's breath, when he leaned into kiss me goodnight. FML

#21414880
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12562) - you deserved it (1073)

On 05/24/2015 at 10:14am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I felt pretty. As I deal with a severe anxiety and depression, I was proud of myself. All until a little girl asked: "Are you a boy or a girl?" FML

Today, my cat has decided she can't eat unless I'm right there with her, so when she gets hungry she finds me and howls until I follow her to her food dish. She likes to eat pretty frequently, and I'm already getting a headache. FML

Today, and for the past couple of days, my girlfriend's father has been trying to help me think of a way to propose. I decided to rehearse first, and that's how my girlfriend walked in on me "proposing" to her dad. FML

Today, my girlfriend of a week showed me her talent: shooting milk out of her vagina across the room. Goodbye dairy products. FML

#21413854
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24002) - you deserved it (2778)

On 05/22/2015 at 2:55am - intimacy - by zzarzzur (man) - United States (California)

Today, I waited tables for the first time at my new restaurant job. I asked a group of older men what they would like. One replied, "A slice of that ass". I'm 19 and a guy. FML

#21413610
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28204) - you deserved it (2598)

On 05/21/2015 at 4:41pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I saw a real, erect penis for the first time. My brother's, while he was jerking off. He doesn't know I saw, because he was holding a pair of panties over his face with his other hand. I'm trying like hell to act like I'm not mentally scarred. FML

#21411971
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29433) - you deserved it (2867)

On 05/18/2015 at 12:58pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, I went to bring my 92-year-old neighbor some cake we had just made. When I walked in, she was wearing pants. That's it. I stared blinking in shock for a few seconds before running away, yelling, "So sorry. I brought you cake. Real tired. Gonna sleep now. Bye." FML

#21409137
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23815) - you deserved it (3016)

On 05/12/2015 at 8:33pm - misc - by Nikki (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I wore a pair of shorts a size too big while doing laundry. When I ordered a pizza afterwards and answered the door, I realized I looked a little heavy, so I sucked in my stomach. My shorts fell to the ground in front of the delivery guy. FML

#21408368
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26435) - you deserved it (8676)

On 05/11/2015 at 12:40pm - misc - by oops (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I had sex with a guy I've liked for ages. We were lying in his bed afterwards, and he mumbled the word "happy". I thought it was really sweet, until he repeated himself. "My girlfriend probably won't be too happy about this." FML

#21407745
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30418) - you deserved it (5401)

On 05/10/2015 at 11:35am - intimacy - by YouDontSay (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I found my 15-year-old son sleeping on the couch. I asked why, and he said he'd rented his room out to someone on Craigslist to make extra money, so he was getting used to sleeping in the living room instead. FML

#21406874
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29064) - you deserved it (2357)

On 05/08/2015 at 5:19pm - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I found out that maggots can live inside of a saxophone. FML

#21406781
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27270) - you deserved it (3711)

On 05/08/2015 at 1:40pm - misc - by McWhopper - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while making out with my boyfriend, I sneezed so hard that my head shot forward and smashed against his, sending his head backwards against the wall. He ended up with a concussion, and I still feel like someone hit me over the head with a chair. FML

#21406759
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25642) - you deserved it (3231)

On 05/08/2015 at 12:46pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I thought it would be funny to fart next to my brother in the car. Apparently, his carsickness is exacerbated by strong smells. I now know what it feels like to have lap full of vomit. FML

#21406695
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13115) - you deserved it (34692)

On 05/08/2015 at 9:51am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my dad drove me to the airport. As I got out of the car, he said, "You better pop that zit on your face, security might think it's a bomb". FML

#21406694
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30405) - you deserved it (2786)

On 05/08/2015 at 9:44am - misc - by brittrus - Canada (Ontario)



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