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drkay

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drkay
  • Town/Country : USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 24 September 1995 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 61
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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drkay's favorite FMLs

Today, I was again turned down by a potential host family on a student exchange site. Their reasoning was basically that since I'm American, I might do something to endanger my health, get hurt, and then sue them over my own stupidity. FML

#20602754
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40620) - you deserved it (11919)

On 04/18/2013 at 5:41pm - misc - by thanks, my fellow americans - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was riding my bike home from the store. Wanting to impress some passers-by, I tried to do a trick on a sharp turn. I hit a pole with my balls. As I was lying on the ground in agony, a guy pulled over, took a picture, and took off laughing. FML

#20602636
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22735) - you deserved it (44910)

On 04/18/2013 at 5:02pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Bulgaria (Sofiya)

Today, I briefly left my laptop while I went to use the toilet. When I came back, I found "I" had posted on Facebook, calling my mom a "stupid cunt who should just stay in the kitchen." The only other person home at the time was my grandpa. She didn't believe it, and permanently grounded me. FML

#20602422
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41048) - you deserved it (4979)

On 04/18/2013 at 3:30pm - misc - by phonesmuggler (man) - United States

Today, I tried to explain to my history teacher why Woodrow Wilson would not have called the Great War "World War 1" as she constantly claims. I was sent to the office for my insubordination. FML

#20601546
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34785) - you deserved it (3969)

On 04/18/2013 at 3:54am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I woke up to my brother chopping all my bangs off. When I yelled at him, he could only shout back, "You can see clearly now, the bangs are gone!" FML

#20599244
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48456) - you deserved it (7994)

On 04/17/2013 at 12:13pm - kids - by my dumb bro - United States (Arkansas)

Today, my virginal girlfriend of a year graduated from veterinary school. She can shove her arm shoulder-deep up a cow's ass without blinking, but still feels too insecure to even touch my penis. FML

#20596452
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64444) - you deserved it (16815)

On 04/16/2013 at 1:44pm - intimacy - by Gurior - Canada

Today, for the fifth time since my parents got divorced, my father has decided he doesn't want to pick me up for his weekend because I'm "too responsible to have fun with." FML

#20596320
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36257) - you deserved it (4969)

On 04/16/2013 at 12:17pm - misc - by ouch - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my husband of 6 years said in a grave voice that he had some important news for me. Jokingly, I said, "Why, did you get that cute colleague of yours pregnant?" He did. FML

#20593773
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67415) - you deserved it (5920)

On 04/15/2013 at 2:36pm - love - by wow (woman) - Russian Federation (Saint Petersburg City)

Today, I forgot to log out of my Facebook account before leaving for work. When I got back home, I discovered that my brother had gone through and commented "quack" on all my friend's duckfacing photos. She was not pleased. FML

#20588155
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26669) - you deserved it (57433)

On 04/13/2013 at 2:07pm - misc - by reallythough - United Kingdom (Oxfordshire)

Today, my boyfriend of 2 weeks said that he was going to cook me dinner. After waiting for the frozen pizza that he decided to make for me to be completely cooked, he said, "Oh I hate this part", reached into the oven with his bare hands and took out the pizza, all while screaming. He is 24. FML

#20584918
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46835) - you deserved it (6377)

On 04/11/2013 at 11:42am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I played Call of Duty with my new flatmate. He continuously lost and was outraged that a girl beat him. It resulted in him shouting at me, claiming that since I'm Muslim, I must be part of the Taliban, which would explain my gaming skills. FML

#20584680
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41286) - you deserved it (5013)

On 04/11/2013 at 5:11am - misc - by zahra_786 (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I had a friend "dump" me over Facebook. She apparently thought we were dating. I'm a gay man who's lived with his partner for 5 years. She says I have commitment issues. FML

#20583902
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41875) - you deserved it (4302)

On 04/10/2013 at 6:17pm - love - by drama king? (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, after my shift at the hospital ended, I happened to look into a full-length mirror. My new scrubs turned out to be see-through. Instead of my undies, everyone got a good look at my cellulite-ridden ass. Fan-fucking-tastic day to wear a thong. FML

#20583566
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35093) - you deserved it (16364)

On 04/10/2013 at 1:41pm - work - by birdiebeth13 - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, and I told him I was close to having an orgasm. He smirked and started talking like Yoda, saying, "Strong with the cum, this one is". Orgasm gone. FML

#20583515
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44278) - you deserved it (7357)

On 04/10/2013 at 12:32pm - intimacy - by iwassoclose - United States

Today, it's my 17th birthday, and the first birthday since my mother died, leaving me to live with my previously-absent father. He gave me pretzels and a laser pointer, and said, "Happy birthday, fuckstick". One more year. FML

#20581667
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61681) - you deserved it (2899)

On 04/09/2013 at 12:59am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada



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