Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

drego5

Online | Search for a member

drego5

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3949
  • Number of comments : 33
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About drego5 : I gotta be me.

drego5's page activity

Visits<b>shaysimonds</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 4:20pm<b>BBlah</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 9:19pm<b>mt631</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 8:54pm<b>hasbeen</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 8:16pm<b>Kyle1dc</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 7:30pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 01/27/2014 at 9:25am<b>blondie9</b> - the 03/19/2013 at 3:20am<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 10:20am

drego5's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of drego5's badges

drego5's favorite FMLs

Today, I went on Facebook. The third post down was a selfie of my mom looking sad, with the caption, "God I need a good dicking." FML

#21218442
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51304) - you deserved it (11840)

On 07/23/2014 at 4:00pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found the iPod touch that my mother claimed was stolen at the mall a few years ago, lying on her bed, still logged in to her Facebook. Thanks, mom. FML

#21217252
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45330) - you deserved it (3923)

On 07/22/2014 at 11:54am - misc - by d4rkxf0x - United States (Texas)

Today, me and my boyfriend decided to have some fun in my room before my parents got home. My phone started vibrating half-way through, and when I saw my mom's picture, I reflexively answered. It wasn't a phone call. It was a face time. Busted. FML

#21208909
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31813) - you deserved it (49095)

On 07/14/2014 at 1:45pm - intimacy - by Ob3nie - United States (California)

Today, I texted my mom asking how she was doing. Apparently she's great, and on her honeymoon. I didn't know she was getting married, or that my parents had just gotten divorced. FML

#21206148
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45446) - you deserved it (4152)

On 07/11/2014 at 4:02pm - misc - by morgan_rumm (woman) -

Today, on the bus, a little boy gave me the dirtiest look, pointed at my pregnant stomach, and menacingly said, "I know what you did." FML

#21205823
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52664) - you deserved it (7173)

On 07/11/2014 at 7:03am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I overheard my mother talking to her friend, and using me as an example of how it's sometimes best to swallow. FML

#21196146
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46979) - you deserved it (4684)

On 07/02/2014 at 11:54am - intimacy - by unwanted daughter (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my dad told me that I was conceived while he and my mother were high on LSD. He then stared into the distance, mumbled "Probably explains a few things" and chuckled to himself. FML

#21182176
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42748) - you deserved it (3880)

On 06/20/2014 at 6:05pm - kids - by Alex (man) - United Kingdom (Ealing)

Today, my daughter told me that she liked her "other daddy" better. I don't know who's she talking about, but my wife is doing a good job telling her to be quiet. FML

#21177000
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58604) - you deserved it (4139)

On 06/16/2014 at 5:38pm - kids - by FirstDaddy (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I found out that my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I have in our last year of marriage. FML

#21175587
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59867) - you deserved it (5701)

On 06/15/2014 at 3:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, it's five days until my wedding and I still can't tell my bride apart from her twin sister. They share clothes, have the same haircut, and they even take turns flirting with me to "catch me off guard" because they think it's hilarious to trick me. I'm scared I'll marry the wrong one. FML

#21133982
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63912) - you deserved it (8110)

On 05/08/2014 at 9:55am - love - by STOP (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex and in the heat of the moment I cried out for him to go harder. He had an exasperated expression on his face, and in an adamantly offended tone he said, "Don't tell me what to do." Then he stopped and left the room. FML

#21115855
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58491) - you deserved it (8290)

On 04/17/2014 at 10:27pm - intimacy - by belljars (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my 12-year-old sister watched Frozen. She's spent the last two hours playing the song Let It Go on high volume over and over, and in different languages. I now have a skull-splitting headache, and my dad just sarcastically told me to "let it go". FML

#21113787
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46102) - you deserved it (5958)

On 04/15/2014 at 3:24pm - kids - by fuckyouharddad - United States (California)

Today, in the middle of sex, my girlfriend yelled, "STUFF ME LIKE A TURKEY!" I couldn't finish. FML

#21112870
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58834) - you deserved it (7498)

On 04/14/2014 at 4:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I found out that the squeaking I've heard for the past three months, that I thought was my guinea pig, is actually my girlfriend cheating on me with my older brother. FML

#21105078
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70340) - you deserved it (6794)

On 04/05/2014 at 10:27am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I thought it would be funny to smack my daughter's head gently with a balloon. It hit her hair clip and exploded. She won't stop crying, and my wife will be home any minute. I'm screwed. FML

#21100295
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41365) - you deserved it (17920)

On 03/30/2014 at 4:36pm - kids - by and not even in the good way (man) - United States



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML
  • Madonna must be the only person breathing a sigh of relief right now thanks to all the idiots arguing about the colour of a dress. Thanks to a badly-lit photograph, everyone seems to have forgotten that she super…

Friday 27 February 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: