Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

drego5

Online | Search for a member

drego5

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3939
  • Number of comments : 33
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About drego5 : I gotta be me.

drego5's page activity

Visits<b>shaysimonds</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 4:20pm<b>BBlah</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 9:19pm<b>mt631</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 8:54pm<b>hasbeen</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 8:16pm<b>Kyle1dc</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 7:30pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 01/27/2014 at 9:25am<b>blondie9</b> - the 03/19/2013 at 3:20am<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 10:20am

drego5's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of drego5's badges

drego5's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at a family gathering with my boyfriend. Jokingly, my grandmother swatted my butt to get me to move. Out of habit, I moaned quite loudly. FML

#21358985
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16736) - you deserved it (28772)

On 02/19/2015 at 12:45am - intimacy - by heymacie (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my wife's boyfriend learned that you can't flush condoms. FML

#21348539
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42935) - you deserved it (2574)

On 02/02/2015 at 6:59pm - intimacy - by StantheMan93 (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex. In the middle of it he said, "I want us to be covalent bonds". I didn't understand what he meant, and he actually stopped to explain it to me. FML

#21346746
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25318) - you deserved it (6879)

On 01/30/2015 at 10:11am - intimacy - by Chemist-why (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend was rushed to the hospital with anal tearing. We've never tried anal before, but it turns out she and my "best friend" sure have. FML

#21342800
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41636) - you deserved it (2511)

On 01/23/2015 at 9:58am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I gambled on a fart and lost. FML

#21337828
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23536) - you deserved it (15086)

On 01/15/2015 at 8:08pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I had to negotiate with my husband so he would bring me toilet paper while I was on the john. His terms? A blowjob. FML

#21334864
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30465) - you deserved it (6381)

On 01/11/2015 at 12:56am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, my mom got me a Christmas present. Since I'm a whovian, she thought it would be cool to get me what she thought was a sonic screwdriver. It was actually a dildo shaped as one. I opened the gift in front of my entire family. FML

#21323893
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33054) - you deserved it (3463)

On 12/25/2014 at 10:17am - intimacy - by whovian - United States (Maine)

Today, my brother and I woke up early to get a sneak peek at our Christmas presents. We found our parents having sex on the couch. FML

#21323779
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34215) - you deserved it (13381)

On 12/25/2014 at 4:13am - intimacy - by VCDUDE11FTW - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend sent Christmas Carollers to my house to tell me he was breaking up with me. FML

Today, I got to experience the horror of my wife's pregnancy. She woke me up abruptly at 5 am by throwing up all over me due to her terrible morning sickness, then ate pickles covered in mayonnaise, and later dropped to the floor sobbing when I told her we were out of dog food. FML

#21315694
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35453) - you deserved it (4284)

On 12/11/2014 at 4:47pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out my boyfriend uses a period tracker app to find out when we can fuck. FML

#21315592
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31803) - you deserved it (6240)

On 12/11/2014 at 1:13pm - intimacy - by Anon - Ireland (Cork)

Today, my husband sent me a link to an article titled "5 ways you are unknowingly destroying your husband and killing your marriage." FML

Today, I woke up from a wet dream. My girlfriend quickly figured it out and bitched me out for having one when she was "right there" for me to ask for sex. Logic failure aside, the last time I flirted with her, she called me a sex-obsessed pig and didn't talk to me for three days. FML

#21315008
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35493) - you deserved it (3717)

On 12/10/2014 at 1:16pm - intimacy - by unlovedandunfucked (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, while clearing stuff out of the basement, I found my ex-wife's old electronic diary device from the '90s. I found the charger, powered it up, and had soon read all about out she'd been cheating on me for almost half our marriage with the guy she's now married to. FML

#21313160
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38435) - you deserved it (3266)

On 12/07/2014 at 2:20pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Ireland (Galway)

Today, I was a bit upset to learn that my 13 year-old daughter had a boyfriend. When she noticed, she assured me that I shouldn't worry, because "it's just for sex anyway". FML

#21311570
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36186) - you deserved it (5460)

On 12/04/2014 at 6:46pm - kids - by aprouddaddy - Sent from mobile version



FML's blog

  • FML's badges: pointless but essential!
  • If you're a regular on FML, it probably means that you're a member. Whatcha mean you're not a member? Right, for a start, run along and create yourself an account. Doing so will allow you to comment on…

Monday 23 February 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: