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dreamer2012

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dreamer2012

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2365
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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dreamer2012's page activity

Visits<b>tatiana1126</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 1:17am<b>tuckit</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 11:59am<b>jazzybrar</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 3:29am<b>05kingranch</b> - the 03/16/2014 at 11:52pm<b>ttr125</b> - the 01/18/2014 at 5:52pm<b>andrew6p</b> - the 12/25/2013 at 4:08am<b>cat_marie</b> - the 12/15/2013 at 1:20am<b>Forever1218</b> - the 12/07/2013 at 8:31pm<b>Eyeslick</b> - the 12/04/2013 at 10:22pm<b>monkeycrutch</b> - the 11/27/2013 at 7:03pm<b>B0SSAHOLIC</b> - the 10/23/2013 at 7:54pm<b>confusedAsFuck</b> - the 10/23/2013 at 2:21pm<b>MortenM</b> - the 10/19/2013 at 10:29pm<b>phatdaddy62</b> - the 10/19/2013 at 2:16pm<b>Kain713</b> - the 10/17/2013 at 4:17pm<b>OkCThunder</b> - the 05/02/2013 at 10:07pm<b>baabinator</b> - the 05/01/2013 at 8:42pm<b>JoBeth</b> - the 05/01/2013 at 1:15am

dreamer2012's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of dreamer2012's badges

dreamer2012's favorite FMLs

Today, it's five days until my wedding and I still can't tell my bride apart from her twin sister. They share clothes, have the same haircut, and they even take turns flirting with me to "catch me off guard" because they think it's hilarious to trick me. I'm scared I'll marry the wrong one. FML

#21133982
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62427) - you deserved it (7255)

On 05/08/2014 at 9:55am - love - by STOP (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while at a restaurant with my husband for our 4-year anniversary, he kept behaving strangely, breathing deeply and eventually sighing happily. I thought the wine had just gone to his head. Nope; he proudly admitted later that he'd jerked off without anyone noticing, even me. FML

#21126320
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42440) - you deserved it (4574)

On 04/29/2014 at 2:48pm - misc - by god (woman) - United Kingdom (West Lothian)

Today, my overly-attached 14-year-old cat wanted attention while I was in a heated Skype argument with my girlfriend. Worked up from the fight, I raised my voice and said, "Not now, go away!" He ran to his little bed, had a heart attack and died. I was a complete dick to my cat in his last moments. FML

#21108570
354 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63230) - you deserved it (30814)

On 04/09/2014 at 2:40pm - animals - by Brody89 (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, after his sixth beer, my dad looked me in the eye and said "I've never forgiven you for what you did to your mother's vagina". FML

#21025234
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54313) - you deserved it (5421)

On 01/12/2014 at 1:38am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I found out that I take long enough showers for my boyfriend to sleep with my sister and put everything back to normal before I get out. I found out when I needed more shampoo that was in a shopping bag in my room. FML

#20984084
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58186) - you deserved it (3853)

On 12/07/2013 at 4:55pm - intimacy - by mystery - United States (North Dakota)

Today, my boyfriend of three years sent me a text message saying "It's over!". I sent him maybe a thousand texts saying "Why?", "What do you mean?!" After an hour of crying and whatnot, I realized he had driver's education today and that he was saying the class was over. FML

#20959504
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29174) - you deserved it (44012)

On 11/16/2013 at 5:06am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it had to poop, but was having difficulty. About four hours later it still hadn't pooped. Turns out it was born without an actual butthole. It was there, just sealed up by skin. I literally had to cut this poor calf a new butthole. FML

#20617044
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72815) - you deserved it (3148)

On 04/23/2013 at 10:01pm - animals - by halliemarie1818 - United States

Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it had to poop, but was having difficulty. About four hours later it still hadn't pooped. Turns out it was born without an actual butthole. It was there, just sealed up by skin. I literally had to cut this poor calf a new butthole. FML

#20617044
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72815) - you deserved it (3148)

On 04/23/2013 at 10:01pm - animals - by halliemarie1818 - United States

Today, I took an afternoon nap, and when I woke up, it was pitch black outside. Still groggy, I went downstairs, only to see my dad sporting a shocked expression and a suspiciously powder-white beard. He actually almost convinced me that I'd just woken up from a five year coma. FML

#20510255
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26522) - you deserved it (5715)

On 02/17/2013 at 12:56am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, while showering with my boyfriend, he asked if something was weird about his penis. Naturally, I looked closer. As soon as I did, he sprayed my face with urine. This is only the beginning; we just moved in. FML

#19586096
361 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45279) - you deserved it (8734)

On 05/07/2012 at 5:42am - intimacy - by quirrus (woman) - United States

Today, I noticed my nephew has blue eyes, freckles and dimples which don't run in my family or my sister's husband's family, but they do run in my husband's family. FML

#19581290
323 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35213) - you deserved it (3539)

On 05/06/2012 at 9:53am - misc - by Damn (woman) - Australia

Today, it was my wedding. Everyone showed up, except my fiancé. FML

#19575941
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43498) - you deserved it (2734)

On 05/05/2012 at 3:08am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I had to explain to a customer how our hotel charged his card even though he has never stayed with us. Apparently his wife is a regular customer. I can't help but feel like a home-wrecker. FML

#19541511
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30720) - you deserved it (1884)

On 04/28/2012 at 9:57am - misc - by Steve - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out my fiancé has been cheating on me for the past month. The lady he has been seeing is a choreographer that was teaching him how to dance salsa for our wedding rehearsal. FML

#19509327
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26385) - you deserved it (1914)

On 04/22/2012 at 1:20am - love - by Gennifer - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my fiancée informed me she'd invited her ex-husband to our wedding at her parents' request. FML

#19480512
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21440) - you deserved it (1647)

On 04/16/2012 at 8:57pm - love - by Tony (man) - United States



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