Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

dreamer13

Search for a member

dreamer13
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 977
  • Number of comments : 21
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

dreamer13's last visitors

alexmac222

dreamer13's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

dreamer13's favorite FMLs

Today, I ordered a graduation cake from a woman at the grocery store. She asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I said "Congratulations Annie". Then she asked me who was ordering and I said "Annie". I had to order my own cake. The woman was silent. FML

#1930906
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44724) - you deserved it (5840)

On 05/14/2009 at 2:09pm - misc - by Annebelle (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, while working my job as a cashier, one of the customers that came to the register was a midget. As part of store policy, I had to ID him, and his driver's license said he was from Florida. So I asked, without catching myself, "How's the weather down there?" FML

#1793303
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27497) - you deserved it (44768)

On 05/09/2009 at 10:05pm - work - by Failoffel (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I had a massive argument with my boyfriend in which he called me stupid repeatedly. I stomped out of his house and sent a very angry text to my best friend about him. She didn't text back. Then my boyfriend texted. 'My girlfriend is so stupid she can't even text the right number.' FML

#1775796
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15149) - you deserved it (66127)

On 05/09/2009 at 11:48am - love - by rawkdinosawr (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I drove 9 hours and took Monday off of work to surprise my Mom and Dad for Easter. They weren't home so I called to tell them the surprise, rather than wait. They didn't answer as they were on a flight to Denver to surprise me for Easter since "I couldn't get off work." FML

#945655
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67141) - you deserved it (12312)

On 04/13/2009 at 6:45am - misc - by traveller (man) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I was going on a plane to Chicago. My passport picture is 6 years old, and back then I was a beautiful model. Now, I gave birth to a child and gained 50 lbs. When I showed my passport to the airport atendents, I got arrested for stealing someones passport. FML

Today, I was in a store using the only bathroom there. After I was done, I realized I couldn't open the door. Panicked it locked me in, I banged on the door, and screamed for help. The security and a whole group of people gathered, only to find that I was pulling the door instead of pushing it. FML

#851826
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12300) - you deserved it (68773)

On 04/07/2009 at 11:51am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Japan

Today, bouncing at a local bar. I I.D.'d a girl with a group of people. I told her that next time she used a fake I.D., she at least should get one with a picture that looked like her. She started crying and ran off. A guy told me that she had been in a car wreck, and had been badly disfigured. FML

#745352
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49475) - you deserved it (64738)

On 04/01/2009 at 12:51pm - work - by tsardaukar (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, I was packing my son's lunch and we ran out of water bottles. I asked my 16 years old to run to the store. She didnt want to but gave me one she had. After dropping my son off, my daughter frantically told me she made a mistake. I sent my second grader to school with a bottle of vodka. FML

#644123
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75814) - you deserved it (14637)

On 03/27/2009 at 2:42pm - misc - by badmom (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I went to the mall with my mom. We were in American Eagle shopping for spring clothes, when a few good looking guys walked by and whistled at me. I smiled at them. They were checking out my mom, not me. FML

#516140
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67819) - you deserved it (5994)

On 03/21/2009 at 7:18pm - misc - by motherdearest (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my family and I were at a restaurant. We're Swedish and love talking about people in our language because no one ever understands here. I decided to comment about how ugly the girl at the next table was. She turned around and goes "Dra åt helvete." That's Swedish for "Go to hell." FML

#329882
424 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21882) - you deserved it (269420)

On 03/14/2009 at 9:30pm - misc - by SwedishBozo (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my mother told me that my father once told her that he was glad she wasn't a red head. He wouldn't have married her if she was because he hates red heads. I am his red-headed daughter. FML

Today, while I was trying to take off my eye make up, I accidentally used nail polish remover. FML

#13539
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13816) - you deserved it (23175)

On 02/07/2009 at 3:43pm - misc - by Snow (woman) - United States (Virginia)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: