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drayloon

Offline (the 07/25/2014 at 6:32pm) | Search for a member

drayloon

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 15 August 1996 (17 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1615
  • Number of comments : 194
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About drayloon : I bet a nickel that you are reading this right now.

drayloon's page activity

Visits<b>The_Illegal_Juan</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 11:43am<b>DemiPewdsLover</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 4:44am<b>geass_user</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 6:53pm<b>AFCCT</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 1:02pm<b>Rallred32</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 9:46pm<b>HylianTwilight</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 11:58am<b>BunchieRules</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 4:30am<b>kidinkbaby</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 9:11am<b>ChenEighty</b> - the 05/21/2014 at 11:04am<b>random__username</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 7:53pm<b>NotR3ddy</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 5:05pm<b>A_Dead_Fish32</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 8:22pm<b>Mabzzz</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 2:20pm<b>Isaiah_T_Brown</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 1:26pm<b>skour1030</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 8:56am<b>Door_Productions</b> - the 04/18/2014 at 3:53am<b>floggnaw_daunis</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 1:11pm<b>R3TROxLOV3</b> - the 04/02/2014 at 3:11am

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drayloon's favorite FMLs

Today, I learned if you type my full name in Google Images, the 3rd thing that comes up is a naked woman in ropes. Someone on Pornhub thought it was smart to comment that the girl looks just like me. She does. Now my parents think I'm a porn star, and most people at school stopped talking to me. FML

#20662282
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62840) - you deserved it (4887)

On 05/14/2013 at 12:15am - intimacy - by magomag (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk, except it wasn't really a talk, but rather him making me watch a hardcore porn video with him as he commented on what the actors were doing. I had to listen to all this and ignore his obvious erection for almost an hour. FML

#20660939
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76992) - you deserved it (5267)

On 05/13/2013 at 3:10pm - intimacy - by more than I wanted to know (man) - Italy (Emilia-Romagna)

Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML

#20637691
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60376) - you deserved it (9124)

On 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my mom accused me of being pregnant. She wouldn't believe me when I told her I'm a virgin, and she challenged me to take a pregnancy test. It came back with a false positive. FML

#20634792
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58110) - you deserved it (4186)

On 05/01/2013 at 1:23pm - health - by DemiRawrs - United States

Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML

#20587443
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60476) - you deserved it (20217)

On 04/13/2013 at 1:04am - misc - by ironies a b*tch - United States (Illinois)

Today, while going down on my girlfriend, I finally managed to give her an orgasm. During that orgasm, she tore out a clump of my hair, causing me to scream in pain. She scowled and said, "Ah shut it, ya little bitch." FML

#20577693
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52187) - you deserved it (11982)

On 04/06/2013 at 3:13pm - intimacy - by dating walter white's gf apparently (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I was trying out my first vibrator. Soon enough, my 12-year-old sister opened my door, walked in, and saw me naked from the waist down. She laughed, called me a virgin, and left. FML

#20574621
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51875) - you deserved it (17638)

On 04/04/2013 at 12:04pm - intimacy - by Ribbed for Her Disaster (woman) - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, I was telling my aunt that I had achieved my blue belt in karate. Looking at my short hair, she says, "You're going to end up a lesbian." Thanks Aunt L. Love you too. FML

Today, I awoke to my husband talking to someone on the phone at 2am. I heard him say, "Baby you're making me hard." Immediately, I asked him who he was talking to. His response? "It's Jake, from State Farm." FML

#20562846
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79511) - you deserved it (8229)

On 03/27/2013 at 7:55pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Hawaii)

Today, while working in childcare, we went to a farm so the kids could see how things worked. They started showing off prize winning cattle and when they bought out "Miss Stacey", the kids lost their shit. My name is Miss Stacey. FML

#20550321
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31804) - you deserved it (2794)

On 03/19/2013 at 1:00am - work - by seriously! - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my girlfriend and I were going to get intimate, so I masturbated before leaving my place, hoping it would help me last longer than usual. 10 minutes in, she shoved me off and started screaming at me, convinced that I've been cheating on her and practising with someone else. FML

#20543433
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46860) - you deserved it (9468)

On 03/14/2013 at 12:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and after a while, she moved her hand down to my crotch. She felt my erection, then got up and yelled at me, calling me a horny pig for "assuming we were going to have sex." FML

#20527203
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61319) - you deserved it (5372)

On 03/01/2013 at 5:54pm - intimacy - by sn-511 (man) - Italy (Campania)

Today, I managed to score a date for the first time in over a year, and was very nervous. When I was asked what I do for a living, I laughed nervously, and then blurted out, "Finger women." What I was trying to jokingly say was that I'm a gynecologist. FML

#20525332
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16171) - you deserved it (34534)

On 02/28/2013 at 2:57am - love - by notapervert - United States (California)

Today, a German guy came into the place where I work. Eager to use the German that I'd learned from my immigrant mother and her family, I started a conversation. Things were going well until the term I grew up thinking meant "Africa" turned out to be racist, translating as "Ape Land." FML

#20523889
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27621) - you deserved it (3742)

On 02/26/2013 at 11:50pm - misc - by Jan (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was sitting on the chair-lift on a ski trip. There was a shift in gears and the metal in the seat began to vibrate. My dad, sister, and step-mom were all on the lift with me, not feeling a thing. It's terribly awkward to converse with your family while you involuntarily orgasm. FML

#20523671
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42692) - you deserved it (5387)

On 02/26/2013 at 10:00pm - intimacy - by Frostbitten (woman) - United States (Maine)



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