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drayloon

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drayloon

2Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 15 August 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2484
  • Number of comments : 222
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 8 posted

About drayloon : I bet a nickel that you are reading this right now.

drayloon's page activity

Visits<b>kelseysking</b> - 21 hours ago<b>NyQuilSausages</b> - yesterday at 3:53pm<b>drdeathnacho</b> - yesterday at 2:54pm<b>SystemofaBlink41</b> - yesterday at 11:50am<b>Actquick</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 5:31am<b>doodlecloud</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 3:54am<b>buckydargon</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 1:17pm<b>phoneaddict13</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 10:28am<b>Malicejane</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 9:35am<b>deusetnatura</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 4:06am<b>sothisisreal</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 4:44pm<b>metalscales</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 4:41pm<b>SabriLittleRed</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 1:45am<b>HackNSlashHD</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 1:09am<b>kudwafuuu</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 12:42am<b>RainbowBitch15</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 10:55pm<b>SammyS2012</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 9:36pm<b>sleepwalker13</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 7:49pm

Liked!<b>Falkin0113</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 6:46am<b>mysteryguy3039</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 3:35am

drayloon's FML badges

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You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.

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You subsequently gave feedback by commenting on an FML that you’d submitted and was published.

One ring to rule them all

You submitted an FML that was successfully published on the website. This makes you an exceptional human being.

See all of drayloon's badges

drayloon's favorite FMLs

Today, I was eating at a Chinese restaurant, when I stopped the waitress to tell her that even though I am of Chinese heritage, I can't understand a word of Chinese. After an awkward silence, she told me she was actually speaking English. FML

#21042741
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39102) - you deserved it (14583)

On 01/28/2014 at 6:16am - misc - by ChickenBallsPlease (woman) - United Kingdom (Norfolk)

Today, I realized that my dog has more work experience than I do. He's a retired military working dog, and I have a Master's degree. FML

#21042693
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39619) - you deserved it (5078)

On 01/28/2014 at 3:22am - animals - by Pooper scooper - Guam

Today, I was reading FML's birthday blog post and saw a picture of myself in it. I would've been happy if it wasn't #4 in the list of worst duckfaces of the week. FML

#21040870
167 comments

Today, after 3 months of no orgasms, I was in the shower, working to rectify that. As I was seconds away from coming, my dad loudly knocked on the door and demanded to know how much longer I was going to take. Probably another 3 months now, dad. FML

#21039460
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49246) - you deserved it (8386)

On 01/25/2014 at 12:42pm - intimacy - by sally - United States (Georgia)

Today, I'm a 34 year old male who just got given the sex talk on my Facebook timeline by my senile mother. 5ML

#21038727
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46424) - you deserved it (5123)

On 01/24/2014 at 8:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was applying for jobs online when my father called. When I told him what I was doing, he said in all seriousness that I should just be a sugar baby. I said he must be joking, but he replied, "Honey, if I had your tits, I'd never work a day in my life." 5ML

#21037822
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41660) - you deserved it (4555)

On 01/24/2014 at 12:15am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, and for the past week, my dog started barking at my door when I start masturbating. I think my mom is starting to suspect. FML

#21037288
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43881) - you deserved it (9916)

On 01/23/2014 at 4:06pm - intimacy - by fappy dog - United States (Illinois)

Today, my students unanimously agreed, in front of me, that the only reason they take my course is to look at my ass. FML

#21028396
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56681) - you deserved it (13933)

On 01/15/2014 at 12:54am - intimacy - by jseid2 - United States (California)

Today, my grandpa took my face in both hands, kissed me on the lips, said "Now you can tell all your friends you've had your first kiss," and walked out of the room. FML

#21023495
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47656) - you deserved it (4513)

On 01/10/2014 at 11:47am - misc - by wtf - United States (New York)

Today, I asked my husband to try a little foreplay for once, instead of just rushing into sex. His idea of foreplay was to sweetly whisper that he was going to "penis" me so hard. That's the first time I've heard the word "penis" used as a verb, and hopefully the last. FML

#21007475
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48751) - you deserved it (6439)

On 12/27/2013 at 5:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my elderly neighbor along with our community church's priest came to my house and demanded to "give them the girl". The girl is my 3-year-old daughter, who has natural born red irises and is photo-sensitive. And yes, we are also Romanian. FML

#20985281
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53000) - you deserved it (2929)

On 12/08/2013 at 5:07pm - kids - by OakStake (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was babysitting my barely-pubescent cousins, and they started talking about giving blowjobs to their "boyfriends". When I got mad at them and told them they shouldn't be thinking of that stuff, they said I was just pissed 'cause I haven't gotten laid. FML

#20984257
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48375) - you deserved it (4530)

On 12/07/2013 at 8:07pm - misc - by bella - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend wants to make a video of us having sex for us to watch later and figure out how to improve our skills in bed. The problem is her choice of cameraman: her uncle. FML

#20978171
204 comments

Today, after getting a root canal, I told my mother how boring it was just sitting there with my mouth open for ages while the dentist did his work. She then told me how she had to do the same kind of thing on her anniversary night with my father. FML

#20968136
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43510) - you deserved it (4366)

On 11/23/2013 at 4:57pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Argentina



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