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drayloon

Offline (the 07/31/2015 at 10:23am) | Search for a member

drayloon

38Fucked!

drayloondrayloon
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 15 August 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 10488
  • Number of comments : 325
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 11 posted

About drayloon : I bet a nickel that you are reading this right now.

Message me if you want, I get bored lol

drayloon's page activity

Visits<b>wafflewolf</b> - yesterday at 1:11pm<b>Unused_Account13</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 7:37pm<b>hfudge</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 2:34pm<b>dyne808</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 5:03am<b>Johnatron</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 5:13pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 8:47pm<b>Musicforlife29</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 12:22am<b>vampivy23</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 11:48pm<b>One_Way</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 1:18pm<b>The_Shrimp52</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 12:43pm<b>Benmantha</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 11:20am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 6:49am<b>kimg0885</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 5:07am<b>Mortoli</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 4:54am<b>Jessica0928</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 3:30am<b>OysterPearls</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 4:21pm<b>jessal</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 12:04am<b>aukaylaheath</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 9:42pm

Fucked!<b>dyne808</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 11:04am<b>karacakal2</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 2:48am<b>annabethjackson4</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 6:57am<b>mikki_arlert</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 10:26pm<b>pugpuggy</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 7:39pm<b>Kazze</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 8:53pm<b>Luis_Gonzo_13</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 8:58pm<b>ECHOSPiiKES</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 12:04pm<b>404_UserNotFound</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 11:44pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 10:47pm<b>insanecutie</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 10:19pm<b>OysterPearls</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 6:03am<b>minecraftguy333</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 12:42am<b>Steve95401</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 4:04am<b>andybub46</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 3:55pm<b>emilyharveyyy</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 7:34pm<b>jesuis_julie</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 5:05pm<b>djuptspartan71</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 1:32am

drayloon's FML badges

I like things a lot, 20 times in fact

You have liked 20 FMLs and your Facebook friends are going to like the FMLs that you have liked. We like that.

42

You see, sonny boy, moderating FMLs is a bit like running a marathon.

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

See all of drayloon's badges

drayloon's favorite FMLs

Today, my guide dog sneezed so hard that it slammed its head on the floor and knocked itself out. I have to trust this dog with my life. FML

#21117679
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53752) - you deserved it (4711)

On 04/20/2014 at 12:03am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Idaho)

Today, I took my kids to an Easter party hosted by a local church. The nice lady in charge told the kids, "Jesus died, but He rose to life again!" My 9 year old screamed, "LIKE A ZOMBIE!" FML

#21116666
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42386) - you deserved it (8301)

On 04/18/2014 at 8:14pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, one of my most problematic students remained after class, whence he strongly insinuated his interest in receiving oral sex; I tried to convey just how inappropriate that was, when he interrupted, "Look, will you at least touch it?" FML

#21114779
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55491) - you deserved it (5724)

On 04/16/2014 at 6:03pm - intimacy - by MILF (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my 12-year-old sister watched Frozen. She's spent the last two hours playing the song Let It Go on high volume over and over, and in different languages. I now have a skull-splitting headache, and my dad just sarcastically told me to "let it go". FML

#21113787
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48748) - you deserved it (6291)

On 04/15/2014 at 3:24pm - kids - by fuckyouharddad - United States (California)

Today, my house was robbed. My two 70-pound German Shepherds obeyed me when I told them to attack. They also obeyed the robber when he said, "Sit". FML

#21113538
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54717) - you deserved it (4945)

On 04/15/2014 at 8:08am - animals - by stupiddog (man) - United States (California)

Today, I realized that my boyfriend is so obsessed with tickling me that my body has developed a conditioned response. Now I flinch every time he touches me, no matter what we're doing. FML

#21111720
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42729) - you deserved it (4186)

On 04/13/2014 at 5:33am - love - by Ticklish - United States (Iowa)

Today, my neighbor asked to come over and use my laptop. She showed up drunk, grabbed my boobs, and asked if I'd ever had a lesbian experience. We both have husbands and kids; the kids were in the room. FML

#21109873
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52680) - you deserved it (5230)

On 04/10/2014 at 10:32pm - intimacy - by freakedout (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, after cleaning my house because I'd thrown a party all weekend while my parents were gone, I still got caught because somebody tried to make beer popsicles with Q-Tips in the ice trays in my freezer. FML

#21106348
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21063) - you deserved it (40211)

On 04/06/2014 at 11:03pm - misc - by trp007 (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went to my crush's house. We were watching a movie when suddenly he started kissing me. As it deepened he began to feel around. He was groping my armpit the whole time but I was too embarrassed that my underarm could pass for my boobs to redirect him. FML

#21104962
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48133) - you deserved it (7814)

On 04/05/2014 at 3:14am - intimacy - by armtits and big pits - United States (Florida)

Today, I met a really nice girl at a club, and we went back to my place. I was finally going to lose my virginity, but just as she started kissing me, I panicked and ended up fainting. When I came to, I was still clothed, and she was long gone. FML

#21104650
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41018) - you deserved it (12296)

On 04/04/2014 at 7:20pm - love - by ohai ur hawt, wanna fuzzzZzZZzzZzz (man) - Mexico (Distrito Federal)

Today, my 14-year-old son's pathetic rebellion came to a head. He ran away from home, leaving a note saying he hates me and was leaving forever to be part of a gang his friends had formed. He came back an hour later crying. His whole gang had gotten mugged, which he somehow blamed me for. FML

#21102946
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49287) - you deserved it (6081)

On 04/02/2014 at 4:10pm - kids - by I Have Failed (man) - Spain (Madrid)

Today, my girlfriend and I were snuggling and we placed our hands together, palm to palm. I can bend the tips of my fingers over hers, which apparently surprised her because she commented, "Huh, so big hands AREN'T related to penis size." FML

#21101616
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57303) - you deserved it (7380)

On 04/01/2014 at 2:06am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my drunken self became a vaguely racist poet. I am now the author of a four-page poem entitled "Chocolate Men". FML

#21094789
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30454) - you deserved it (16253)

On 03/23/2014 at 11:40pm - misc - by chocochoco - United States (New York)

Today, my dad decided to shave his beard. I told him I wanted him to keep it, so he took the shavings, put them in a jar, and left it in my room. FML

#21093737
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35358) - you deserved it (12202)

On 03/22/2014 at 7:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my dad took me to a bar for my first legal drink. He quickly got "drunk" and started slurring that I was an accident, saying the only reason I'm alive is because he'd been too poor to pay for an abortion. As I started crying, he burst out laughing and said soberly, "Just kidding, son." FML

#21092859
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46918) - you deserved it (6116)

On 03/21/2014 at 6:35pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Australia



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