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drayloon

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drayloon

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drayloondrayloon
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 15 August 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4401
  • Number of comments : 262
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 9 posted

About drayloon : I bet a nickel that you are reading this right now.

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drayloon's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out my boyfriend uses a period tracker app to find out when we can fuck. FML

#21315592
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30023) - you deserved it (6124)

On 12/11/2014 at 1:13pm - intimacy - by Anon - Ireland (Cork)

Today, I found out my boyfriend uses a period tracker app to find out when we can fuck. FML

#21315592
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30023) - you deserved it (6124)

On 12/11/2014 at 1:13pm - intimacy - by Anon - Ireland (Cork)

Today, I told my boss I have a sore throat. He replied, "Well, don't take it so deep next time." FML

#21314442
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32042) - you deserved it (5290)

On 12/09/2014 at 1:29pm - work - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, I was getting to second base with a really hot guy, but I couldn't stop laughing when he said my boobs were "soft like cake." He got so embarrassed that he lost his boner. FML

#21303170
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32472) - you deserved it (9001)

On 11/21/2014 at 4:56am - intimacy - by weirdthingtosay (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I managed to convince my sister that when you press down the diet button on the lid of a McDonald's cup it turns whatever is in there diet. I pressed the button and she started shouting how she hates diet drinks. She's 19. FML

#21292789
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28880) - you deserved it (3324)

On 11/05/2014 at 4:25pm - misc - by aineroo (woman) - Ireland (Galway)

Today, I stumbled across one of my son's English assignments. Apparently, he decided to submit a haiku about how electrical outlets are technically "whores" because they hook up with countless cords for a "charge." I don't know whether to be amused or furious. FML

#21285975
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32612) - you deserved it (4554)

On 10/26/2014 at 10:42pm - kids - by MySonThePoet (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my boyfriend and I tried roleplaying a teacher-student during sex. We're both studying to be actors, so we ended up going into a really deep, emotional storyline that didn't end in sex at all. FML

#21284275
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37003) - you deserved it (10800)

On 10/24/2014 at 6:54am - intimacy - by too good - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, my 17-year-old son managed to easily convince my 13-year-old daughter that if you have sex before getting married, you'll instantly get horrible diseases that will kill you. Her freaking out is how I found out she's not only gullible as hell, but sexually active as well. FML

#21283066
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41216) - you deserved it (5019)

On 10/22/2014 at 12:09pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, my 17-year-old son managed to easily convince my 13-year-old daughter that if you have sex before getting married, you'll instantly get horrible diseases that will kill you. Her freaking out is how I found out she's not only gullible as hell, but sexually active as well. FML

#21283066
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41216) - you deserved it (5019)

On 10/22/2014 at 12:09pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, my 17-year-old son managed to easily convince my 13-year-old daughter that if you have sex before getting married, you'll instantly get horrible diseases that will kill you. Her freaking out is how I found out she's not only gullible as hell, but sexually active as well. FML

#21283066
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41216) - you deserved it (5019)

On 10/22/2014 at 12:09pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, a nurse asked my relationship status. I answered, "Married". She then asked if there was any possibility of me being pregnant. I hardly contained my snort, before responding, "No, you have to have sex for that." I'm not sure what's worse, the fact that it's true or her laughter. FML

#21275225
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38030) - you deserved it (5000)

On 10/10/2014 at 9:25pm - intimacy - by bluevix (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I witnessed some greasy twat trying to chat a girl up by negging her, which is basically insulting a woman to lower her self-esteem so she's more likely to put out. "Goddamn negger", I muttered. "The fuck did you just say?!" yelled a black guy standing beside me. FML

#21275066
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31423) - you deserved it (14451)

On 10/10/2014 at 4:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my drunk husband came home, got into bed, and started humping the body pillow. He ended up whining about how I hadn't come yet, then angrily slurred that I must be cheating on him. All I could do was stay quiet and wonder how the idiot even made it home alive. FML

#21266933
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47425) - you deserved it (3524)

On 09/28/2014 at 11:30am - intimacy - by tw@ (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I was sitting on a bench at the local park, eating a banana. A guy old enough to be my grandfather walked by, turned to look at me, then said "Young man, I wish I were that banana." He walked away, and I almost blacked out choking on it in shock. FML

#21265897
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35741) - you deserved it (3651)

On 09/26/2014 at 4:40pm - misc - by Operation Yewtree here I come (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I won a gruelling fitness competition, only to find out the mystery prize was a voucher to get 10 free spray tans. I'm black. FML

#21249089
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46904) - you deserved it (3803)

On 08/31/2014 at 2:44pm - misc - by disappointedjamaican - United Kingdom (Coventry)



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