dragonstrike94

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dragonstrike94

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 2771
  • Number of comments : 135
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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dragonstrike94's page activity

Visits<b>angrykid11</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 8:12am<b>swimthenread27</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 9:24pm<b>EverettA</b> - the 04/23/2016 at 5:51pm<b>saucetheman</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 3:11pm<b>swmmrrnr</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 1:37am<b>foampositedaddy</b> - the 01/07/2016 at 12:38am<b>FilipinoDude9</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 3:56am<b>redstone7693</b> - the 12/13/2015 at 9:50pm<b>MassiDelta</b> - the 12/04/2015 at 4:02pm<b>hazelbravi</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 4:13pm<b>Raleaf</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 1:07pm<b>anthonyg2188</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 5:30pm<b>123456789010111</b> - the 10/09/2015 at 10:56am<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 10/03/2015 at 7:22pm<b>happysmile987</b> - the 09/19/2015 at 4:47am<b>Warriorflex</b> - the 09/12/2015 at 8:55pm<b>vintral88</b> - the 09/03/2015 at 5:19pm<b>kiki1705</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 9:29am

Fucked!<b>hazelbravi</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 10:14pm<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 10/04/2015 at 1:22am

dragonstrike94's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of dragonstrike94's badges

dragonstrike94's favorite FMLs

Today, the police called and told me that they had Alex in custody. Apparently, she had public sex with another woman and wants me to come bail her out. Alex is my mom. FML

by runescapeftw / 12/29/2009 at 1:18pm / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, my mom revealed to me that when I was in Preschool, I used to get caught in the bathroom with little boys while I was feeling their "no no" area. I was giving hand jobs to boys before I could read. FML

by Anonymous / 12/15/2009 at 9:20pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I kissed my iced over window to know what kissing Edward Cullen would be like. My neighbor saw. My first reaction was to come up with a cover story. I licked the window and wiped my sleeve over it to look like I was cleaning it. My neighbor came over later and gave me an early Christmas gift. Windex. FML

by obsessed / 11/27/2009 at 12:12am / United States (Iowa) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at a Remembrance Day service when an old widow told me I had my "grandad's" medals on the wrong side of my coat. I told her that I was an Afghanistan veteran and that they were mine. She then berated me in front of the WHOLE service for "lying". FML

by Danners88 / 11/10/2009 at 11:36pm / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend texted me telling me how much he loved me, and that he wanted my virginity. We have already done it. I don't think he meant to send that text to me. FML

by screwed.over / 10/10/2009 at 7:21pm / United Kingdom (London) / Intimacy

Today, my best friend and I went to the movies. There was a hot cashier, so I thought it would be cool to talk in a British accent to try and be sexy. I walked up and started talking when he interrupted me and said in a very heavy British accent, "I know you're faking. You can stop now." FML

by dammitt / 10/10/2009 at 2:10am / United States (Washington) / Work

Today, I was talking to my boyfriend on the way to meet him. While chatting, I told him that I had a rip in my favorite jeans. When he sympathetically apologized, I said "It's okay, you're just going to take them off in a minute, anyway." I forgot my mom was in the car. FML

by leahbeuhh / 09/05/2009 at 9:39am / United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire) / Love

Today, my wife thought it would be fun to bring in one of her girlfriends for a threesome. Because of the friend, I now know what my wife sounds like when she's having a REAL orgasm. Five years and two kids into our marriage. FML

by onehundredpercenteffed / 08/13/2009 at 9:46pm / United States (Idaho) / Intimacy

Today, I finally decided to tell my mother, a former Miss North Carolina winner, that I was several weeks pregnant. She immediately burst into tears and hugged me. She kept saying, "Thank god, thank god." At first I was relieved. Then she said, "I thought you were just getting fat." FML

by Anonymous / 08/03/2009 at 12:11am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I gave my wife of four years a special anniversary gift: a red rose dipped in liquid gold so that she would cherish and admire it forever. She told me it was too "Italian" looking. I now have a hundred dollar rose sitting in my office. FML

by WiltedFlower / 07/31/2009 at 12:02pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, I was at a friend's party. Her neighbor and I really hit it off. We went off into the woods and left everyone, including her parents, at the bonfire. We started hooking up when my friend ran over. Apparently they could see everything. We had on glow stick necklaces and bracelets. FML

by hoho5191 / 07/20/2009 at 12:50pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend's mom pulled me aside and started telling me about how her daughter was extremely depressed and suicidal before she met me, and how happy her family is because of me. I was planning on breaking up with her within the next week. FML

by hungryman / 07/14/2009 at 5:10pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I'm studying abroad in Russia, and I lost my keys to my dorm room. In the office I asked for a spare and she spoke really fast so I couldn't hear her. Assuming I don't speak Russian, she gets on the phone and calls maintenance saying, "There is this ugly girl about to cry... come fix it." FML

by icanunderstand / 07/10/2009 at 8:50am / Russian Federation (Saint Petersburg City) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to be go to the ER after I fell on a rake. After having stiches put in, my Mom wanted me to go to the store with her. My friend saw me at the store and thought it would be funny to rip off the band aid because she thought I was hiding a zit. She ripped out my stitches. FML

by Anonymous / 07/05/2009 at 7:20pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my daughter asked me what is the youngest age at which you should start having sex. Being a good mom, I said that she shouldn't have sex until after she's been married. My daughter then said, "Oh... shoot," and walked away. My daughter is twelve. FML

by blazer / 06/29/2009 at 8:40pm / United States (Minnesota) / Intimacy