doumtabarnack

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Offline (the 07/30/2016 at 8:39pm)

doumtabarnack

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 914
  • Number of comments : 203
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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doumtabarnack's page activity

Visits<b>AnnaMuffin</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 12:02pm<b>organizse</b> - the 06/13/2016 at 10:29am<b>TheHeirofTime</b> - the 05/29/2016 at 7:18am<b>HeatherFeatherB</b> - the 05/24/2016 at 9:29pm<b>shaysilverchase</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 4:31pm<b>ryan_k62</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 8:46pm<b>andrmac</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 8:12pm<b>nothemother</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 9:21am<b>ExplosiveTurtles</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 10:39pm<b>heirofhope</b> - the 10/06/2015 at 8:18pm<b>Feklfekl2222</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 10:46am<b>UltamiteNinja71</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 7:07am<b>xkbabyxo</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 3:18am<b>TheLoner2</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 6:31pm<b>noahpearson1611</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 12:31pm<b>stereomommy</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 2:43pm<b>Casper___t</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 6:56pm<b>oldtoad</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 8:16pm

Fucked!<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 3:13am<b>WildJubeJube</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 3:26pm

doumtabarnack's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of doumtabarnack's badges

doumtabarnack's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out my parents have been slipping birth control pills into my morning orange juice since I was 13. FML

Today, we had a guy come into the hospital with a carrot stuck deep in his anus. I've heard all kinds of ridiculous cover stories, but his took the cake; he claimed the phone rang while he was showering and he slipped onto a box of vegetables. Guess who had to extract the carrot. FML

by Anonymous / 06/18/2014 at 3:06pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I was out with my grandma when a pair of very shady guys approached us in the street, hands in their pockets. Without breaking stride, she pulled a knife out of her handbag and told them they'd better keep walking. They did. What the fuck, gran? FML

by emasculated 10000% / 05/04/2013 at 1:05pm / Sweden (Kronobergs Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was sitting on the chair-lift on a ski trip. There was a shift in gears and the metal in the seat began to vibrate. My dad, sister, and step-mom were all on the lift with me, not feeling a thing. It's terribly awkward to converse with your family while you involuntarily orgasm. FML

by Frostbitten / 02/26/2013 at 10:00pm / United States (Maine) / Intimacy

Today, while showering with my boyfriend, he asked if something was weird about his penis. Naturally, I looked closer. As soon as I did, he sprayed my face with urine. This is only the beginning; we just moved in. FML

by quirrus / 05/07/2012 at 5:42am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I had to bury my horse again because coyotes keep digging it up. FML

by Anonymous / 03/06/2012 at 11:03pm / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, my dad got drunk and thought it would be a great idea to clean up the yard by dumping gasoline all over the leaves and lighting our entire front yard on fire. FML

by JWhite / 11/24/2011 at 3:42am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was busily having fun with my girlfriend, when suddenly the bedroom door opened and a man walked in, picked me up, and threw me outside the apartment. I was naked and didn't even know she was into men, much less had a husband. FML

by Katrina / 02/13/2011 at 5:32pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Intimacy

Today, I need to find a way to explain to my 5, 7 and 12 year old kids their uncle wants to become their aunt. FML

by Anonymous / 11/09/2010 at 12:32am / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I sneezed so hard I herniated my back. After passing out from the pain I awoke on the floor covered in my own shit and piss. Unable to move, I had to wait in this state for four hours for my wife to return home from work, clean me up and take me to the hospital. FML

by Noname / 01/26/2009 at 7:02pm / Japan (Fukuoka) / Health