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dotar

Offline (the 09/22/2014 at 5:03am) | Search for a member

dotar

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 7 August 1987 (27 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2243
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About dotar : Hey there :3

dotar's page activity

Visits<b>stryggzy</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 3:30pm<b>Saso</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 8:23pm<b>redwoods</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 5:23pm<b>Tbear11</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 6:53pm<b>jack_jill05</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 6:55pm<b>AllKnowingTurtle</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 1:26pm<b>jelly_bennett</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 1:18pm<b>davotesolono</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 7:04pm<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 3:48pm<b>shudson186</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 10:58pm<b>aha_awkward_</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 1:25pm<b>TehAnderz</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 10:47pm<b>boostedc</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 6:17pm<b>gingalife8991</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 11:14pm<b>NiceGuysDoWin</b> - the 05/04/2014 at 7:19am<b>GuernseyGirl</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 6:24am<b>Earrings100</b> - the 04/24/2014 at 4:20pm<b>JamieLT</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 8:24pm

dotar's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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dotar's favorite FMLs

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex in the early hours of the morning. He said "Morning sex is the best thing to wake up to." Without thinking, I responded "Yeah, unless you're in prison." He lost his erection due to laughing so hard and now can't look at me without laughing. FML

#21262210
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35490) - you deserved it (9242)

On 09/21/2014 at 1:11am - intimacy - by RuinedTheMood (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend went shopping at Victoria's Secret with me. While she was in the fitting room, her parents walked by and saw me. They don't approve of the store, so I panicked and told them I was considering becoming a woman. FML

#21255419
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41570) - you deserved it (11620)

On 09/09/2014 at 11:16pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my new doctor gave me a breast exam and said everything was healthy, before adding "Well, I think so, anyway. I don't actually work here." As I freaked out, he laughed out loud, said he was just kidding, and that he should prescribe me a chill pill. FML

#21241090
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42013) - you deserved it (5962)

On 08/19/2014 at 4:46pm - health - by humdrummitydrum (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that if you wake your 7-year old sister up by plugging her nose, you'll wake up the next morning, taped down and unable to move as she pours ice water on you. FML

Today, despite all of the empty seats on the bus, a man sat next to me. So close to me that our legs touched. After a few moments of silence, he got closer and whispered in my ear, "You're so quiet." FML

Today, I saw a cute guy and decided to say hi. As I started to think about things to talk about, one story in particular about a drummer who looked like Jesus stuck out in my mind. I was so nervous that instead of saying hi, I blurted out, "Some people look like Jesus!" and took off. FML

Today, my dad told me that I can't wear leggings on Friday nights, because, "your butt is too distracting for my poker buddies." FML

Today, I was singing while driving through the car park. I blacked out trying to hit a high note, and ended up bashing into another car. FML

#21063366
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22877) - you deserved it (39605)

On 02/17/2014 at 12:43pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was sitting on the couch, watching The Avengers with my 4-year-old daughter, who loves the Hulk. When Hulk finally showed up, she excitedly looked at me and screamed, "Hulk Smash" before slamming both of her fists into my balls. FML

#21044971
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49765) - you deserved it (6237)

On 01/30/2014 at 7:34am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was in a market in France, and went to ask the seller for some potatoes. I speak fluent French, but I got flustered and instead of saying "pomme de terre", which is the French for potato, I said "pomme de merde". I literally asked for an "apple of shit". FML

Today, I went to get my first tattoo. Before we started, the tattooist told me to just relax and embrace the pain. I guess I did that too well; I kept getting an erection throughout. FML

#21030923
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40101) - you deserved it (7705)

On 01/17/2014 at 3:56pm - health - by sausages (man) - Macedonia (Karpos)

Today, my 7-year-old daughter made a new game: hitting me in the groin when I'm not expecting it. She hunts me in the house, hides around corners, and behind furniture to ambush me. She'll even do it if she catches me napping. I'm a grown man living in fear of a little girl. FML

#21029770
320 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51598) - you deserved it (11550)

On 01/16/2014 at 12:57pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via a sign he made in front of my Minecraft house. FML

#21000308
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44147) - you deserved it (5838)

On 12/21/2013 at 3:05pm - misc - by back to creepers (woman) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, my elderly neighbor along with our community church's priest came to my house and demanded to "give them the girl". The girl is my 3-year-old daughter, who has natural born red irises and is photo-sensitive. And yes, we are also Romanian. FML

#20985281
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53011) - you deserved it (2930)

On 12/08/2013 at 5:07pm - kids - by OakStake (man) - United States (New York)

Today, while teaching juniors about black holes, I said, "Imagine everything being sucked into a black hole." An African-American student shouted, "I'd better start clenching!" Nobody took the lesson seriously after that. FML

#20946225
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43282) - you deserved it (5253)

On 11/05/2013 at 8:22am - work - by regretsteachinghighschool - United States (Minnesota)



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