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doo_f

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doo_f

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  • Number of visits : 1139
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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doo_f's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife compared me to Sid the sloth from Ice Age. Same smile, same eyes, same belly, same big feet. FML

#17629436
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24363) - you deserved it (5127)

On 08/31/2011 at 12:25pm - love - by faceless_sailor8 - United States

Today, my parents wouldn't let me go to the fair because they reckon my IQ is so low, I could quite possibly choke on cotton candy and pass out confused by the hall of mirrors. FML

#17335799
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25597) - you deserved it (5882)

On 08/01/2011 at 8:31pm - misc - by vsf - United States

Today, I called my phone company to get some answers about my phone bill. I was okay with being put on hold. In fact, I was on hold for so long, that the music stopped playing. When someone finally answered they told me to call back tomorrow. All my phones disconnected an hour later. FML

#16992661
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31650) - you deserved it (2418)

On 07/05/2011 at 10:20pm - money - by Broguy - Canada

Today, my kitchen is flooded, and according to my landlord, this is normal, because it rained last night. Funny, I thought the purpose of a roof was to stop water from getting in. Guess I was wrong. Silly me. FML

#16559634
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41354) - you deserved it (3367)

On 06/08/2011 at 7:22am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France

Today, my dad came to my graduate art show wearing a t-shirt saying "My other daughter is a science major". He'd had it specially made. FML

#16341041
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38088) - you deserved it (6824)

On 05/25/2011 at 10:06am - misc - by art_major (woman) - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, I got slapped in the face by my girlfriend with a banana skin, because I finished up the chocolate cake. FML

#14921394
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10782) - you deserved it (34098)

On 02/10/2011 at 11:09am - misc - by Jaws (man) - France (Alsace)

Today, while in my doctor's packed waiting room, an elderly woman insisted I take her seat. I thanked her, but politely declined. She began to yell, saying I was "ungrateful", until I sat down. She then left, laughing, as I discovered that she peed in the chair. Apparently, she does this often. FML

Today, while giving a brief presentation at work, I blanked out on what I was going to say. I tried to make a joke and tell them I'd had a brain fart, but all I managed to say was "I farted". Well, at least they all laughed. FML

#14211006
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28450) - you deserved it (7869)

On 12/15/2010 at 6:57am - work - by Mike -

Today, one my friends died. All my crying gave me a headache, so I asked my boyfriend to bring me some aspirin. My headache didn't go away. Instead, I got diarrhea because my boyfriend gave me laxatives instead of aspirin as a "joke" to cheer me up. FML

#14147287
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52245) - you deserved it (3853)

On 12/09/2010 at 9:23pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my parents told me about how they met. I'd already known they were eight years apart, but I never knew my dad started dating my mom when he was 21 and she was 13. FML

#13561698
348 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50910) - you deserved it (3610)

On 10/23/2010 at 12:01pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I tried to jump between the train doors to make it in on time. And missed. FML

#13391537
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10441) - you deserved it (23219)

On 10/10/2010 at 11:16am - misc - by Icey_dan1 - Sent from mobile version

Today, a crying kid was brought to my attention by a customer. He was so upset from losing his mom that he couldn't say his name or his moms name. I took him around the store asking him to point out his mom. Once we found her she told me "I was hiding from my kid to test his independence." FML

#13107358
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34242) - you deserved it (2373)

On 09/19/2010 at 12:27am - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, after a few months of my neighbors friend parking outside his house and honking until he came outside, I happened to be out doing lawn work. I politely screamed "STOP HONKING YOUR F***ING HORN!" To which they responded by moving in front of MY house and holding down their horn. I hate people. FML

#12930514
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32593) - you deserved it (15231)

On 09/06/2010 at 6:45am - misc - by Myself - United States

Today, my boyfriend got scared of a fly, freaked out, and accidentally punched me in the face. FML

#12926482
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26777) - you deserved it (3664)

On 09/06/2010 at 12:25am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Dakota)

Today, was parent appreciation day at my daughter's KG class. On the stage, each child was asked to define each parent in one word. When it was my daughter's turn, she looked at me hard, thinking. Finally, in the end she said, "My daddy is very fat." Everybody stared. FML

#10717478
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25507) - you deserved it (7136)

On 05/23/2010 at 7:00pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)



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