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dontyaloveme

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dontyaloveme
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dontyaloveme's favorite FMLs

Today, my grandma added to my elephant collection by giving me some underwear with elephant ears on the hips, and a long, sock-like nose. She has no idea they're meant for a guy. FML

#20989013
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46175) - you deserved it (4407)

On 12/11/2013 at 3:14pm - intimacy - by ElephantLover (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I learned that just because you live on a different continent, it doesn't mean your mother won't come knocking when you are having sex. FML

#20989004
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47758) - you deserved it (3833)

On 12/11/2013 at 2:59pm - intimacy - by hi Mum - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my elderly neighbor along with our community church's priest came to my house and demanded to "give them the girl". The girl is my 3-year-old daughter, who has natural born red irises and is photo-sensitive. And yes, we are also Romanian. FML

#20985281
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49624) - you deserved it (2360)

On 12/08/2013 at 5:07pm - kids - by OakStake (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was walking through a crosswalk when a lady in a car looked at me with a horrified expression and then hit her door locks repeatedly. FML

#20176506
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17646) - you deserved it (1773)

On 11/24/2012 at 11:35am - misc - by lobstercola - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I finally had the confidence to show my girlfriend my hairy chest/stomach. I'm very self conscious about it, and get embarrassed easily. She said I looked disgusting, called me Chewbacca and broke up with me on the spot. FML

#13206157
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38267) - you deserved it (6171)

On 09/26/2010 at 5:26am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Vietnam (Ha Noi)

Today, I came home to my wife crying. She had mixed up our newborn twin girls and couldn't tell which was which. I looked at the girls. Neither could I. FML

#12953032
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48136) - you deserved it (7497)

On 09/07/2010 at 7:48pm - kids - by uselessdad - Singapore



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  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

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