Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

domking1315

Online | Search for a member

domking1315

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3379
  • Number of comments : 361
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About domking1315 : I died a little bit inside when I read these FML's in moderation:

"Today I was thinking that i have the desire to move to a tribe that has never made contact with civilization and have sex with one of the guys and have freaky sex with him and turn him out! And then he told all his friends that I'm the queen of sex and be tribe slut. What do you think?"

"Today I woke up to my penis chopped off and my girlfriend cooking it I'm broiled water... She's laughing at my pain while I'm sitting in the hospital trying to cut off her vagina!"

"Today I fucked a dog I'm not proud of it but it happens."

"Today I was jerkin' it in the shower. just as I reached climax my baby sister walked in. being two years old, she opened the curtain and I trurned around amd ended up cumming on her face. then she screamed and my dad walked in."

"Today I farted and my ex boyfriends cum shot out at my wife."

domking1315's page activity

Visits<b>kelseysking</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 2:53pm<b>alice_18</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 12:37pm<b>shiny_shipper</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 12:27pm<b>RageWolf16</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 11:33am<b>jaydoug92</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 11:11pm<b>Kbuk13jfkdm</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 10:41pm<b>darkparadox</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 4:06am<b>Queen_bee1234</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 2:05pm<b>Connerm</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 10:36am<b>MrBuffalo</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 10:35am<b>jbond97</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 7:22am<b>FrenchieJoking</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 6:54am<b>omgbrainZ</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 6:42am<b>Domdom96</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 3:05am<b>Tbear11</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 12:59am<b>dzhonatan</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 12:00am<b>Neylin</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 7:40am<b>Broadway_Vayne</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 2:51pm

domking1315's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of domking1315's badges

domking1315's favorite FMLs

Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML

#17767423
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29552) - you deserved it (8251)

On 09/17/2011 at 9:20pm - kids - by awesomekidsmum - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML

#17767423
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29552) - you deserved it (8251)

On 09/17/2011 at 9:20pm - kids - by awesomekidsmum - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was brutally run over by a man in a wheelchair. FML

#17757817
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24132) - you deserved it (3548)

On 09/16/2011 at 1:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my parents came to my house for my birthday. My mom backed her car into my motorcycle, knocking it over. She said because it was my birthday I could pay for the damages to her car later. FML

Today, while at the beach, my little brother's hat blew off. I chased after it before I completely lost sight and realized I was no match for the wind. I get back and he's wearing the hat. I chased a fucking trash bag for a mile thinking it was his hat. FML

#17729862
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22856) - you deserved it (9687)

On 09/12/2011 at 6:32pm - misc - by justhereforlaughs (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, while at the beach, my little brother's hat blew off. I chased after it before I completely lost sight and realized I was no match for the wind. I get back and he's wearing the hat. I chased a fucking trash bag for a mile thinking it was his hat. FML

#17729862
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22856) - you deserved it (9687)

On 09/12/2011 at 6:32pm - misc - by justhereforlaughs (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, the hillbillies who inhabit the apartment above mine got karaoke machine. It's 1 am and they're singing Achy Breaky Heart. FML

#17715363
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30815) - you deserved it (2931)

On 09/10/2011 at 11:18pm - misc - by 5.9Cummins (woman) - Canada

Today, desperate after a very painful breakup, I poured my heart and soul out to my old teddy bear. When I finished, I asked what he would do in my situation. Right on cue, a gust of wind came through the window and sent him falling off the windowsill and crashing head-first onto the floor. FML

#17706108
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35036) - you deserved it (6143) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 09/09/2011 at 7:18pm - love - by Angie - France

Today, I heard on a TV show that it's possible to fit a standard light-bulb in your mouth, but it can't be removed afterwards. I just had to try this out. And then visit the local hospital to get it removed. FML

#17695095
295 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7846) - you deserved it (60661)

On 09/08/2011 at 6:00am - health - by Stuck (man) - United States

Today, my six year old nephew told me to peel off my skin because, "They say you look prettier on the inside." FML

#17652059
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28555) - you deserved it (3047)

On 09/03/2011 at 10:36am - kids - by abby181 - United States (Colorado)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Because she farted, and thought it was "too awkward". FML

#17649576
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35727) - you deserved it (3388)

On 09/03/2011 at 12:48am - love - by CHStennis_4 - United States (Utah)

Today, I found my husband Googling Morse Code. He thinks his farts are trying to communicate with him. FML

#17611865
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30336) - you deserved it (3418)

On 08/29/2011 at 11:38am - health - by KJL - United States

Today, while bitching some girl out for spilling coffee all over me, she looks at me with accepting eyes and says after I'd finished, "I can understand your anger, big girls like you get grumpy when they're hungry." FML

#17606800
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12548) - you deserved it (42932)

On 08/28/2011 at 5:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I told my dad I was going to the gym. He stood up and clapped. FML

#17513277
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26063) - you deserved it (9974)

On 08/18/2011 at 8:59pm - health - by kaitylait (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, two Jehovah's Witnesses rang my doorbell for the 10th time. This time they asked me whether I knew Faith's greatest enemy. I replied, "Basic reasoning?" A copy of The Watchtower can really hurt when it hits you in the eye. FML

#17468167
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34812) - you deserved it (9638)

On 08/14/2011 at 7:20am - misc - by Goaway (man) - United States (Connecticut)



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: