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djsammyc

Offline (the 09/11/2014 at 8:48pm) | Search for a member

djsammyc

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 18 June 1999 (15 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1350
  • Number of comments : 168
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About djsammyc : hi, im sam. im a socially awkward clutz with an over active imagination. I will most likely never get published but that doesnt mean I wont try to turn my misfortune into a good laugh for you:)

djsammyc's page activity

Visits<b>choco_nades</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 10:47pm<b>aron1991</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 3:21am<b>LizzieC22</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 1:08am<b>michman3030</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 5:24pm<b>chingachonga</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 4:46pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 4:34pm<b>Kidkaplan</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 11:09pm<b>Cruzg2017</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 8:43pm<b>ian3866</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 6:36pm<b>SiKH_WiT_iT</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 5:28pm<b>kingteefteef</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 5:15pm<b>guess_again</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 10:44am<b>rdnkchevy</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 9:33pm<b>ZooMzy</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 11:40am<b>zingline89</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 10:45am<b>_Rachel_2008</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 6:43am<b>lazyslumber</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 6:36am<b>HumbleExistence</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 5:23am

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djsammyc's favorite FMLs

Today, my parents sat me down and told me that I'm adopted. I took it in stride, and reassured them that as far as I'm concerned, they're my true parents. That annoyed them. Apparently the whole thing was a prank for a YouTube video, which I ruined by not crying or freaking out. FML

#21247893
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44921) - you deserved it (2770)

On 08/29/2014 at 2:09pm - kids - by hannahka (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my brother told my 3 year old son that cool kids call their parents by their real names. This wouldn't be half as bad if he hadn't also convinced my son that my real name was Satan. FML

#21247749
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38935) - you deserved it (3442)

On 08/29/2014 at 8:35am - kids - by Amithatevil - Japan (Kanagawa)

Today, I dreamed I was wrestling an alligator. I quickly woke up to my girlfriend yelling and me holding her in a headlock. FML

#21247589
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37203) - you deserved it (4992)

On 08/29/2014 at 12:16am - misc - by AgentOrion - United States (Alabama)

Today, my boyfriend was stroking my stomach and looking into my eyes. It was very romantic, until he grabbed my love handles and said, "Mmmm... bacon..." FML

#21247445
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35363) - you deserved it (4674)

On 08/28/2014 at 9:47pm - love - by ch4nny (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my demented little sister walked up to me and kicked me between the legs. I told my parents, but they just accusingly asked me what I did to provoke her. When I said "nothing", they accused me of lying. There is no justice. FML

#21247278
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37254) - you deserved it (2883)

On 08/28/2014 at 5:16pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Portugal

Today, my new boyfriend and I got intimate for the first time. He started whispering in my ear, but I couldn't understand him. He pushed me away and ignored me the rest of the night. Apparently it's a huge turn-off that I can't talk dirty in Klingon. FML

#21246884
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42590) - you deserved it (4918)

On 08/28/2014 at 12:34am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after coming home from a two week vacation, my dog was pink, there were beer bottles and used condoms on my bed, and everything was a mess. I asked my sister, who'd been watching over the place, what had happened. She just said "Oops." and hung up. FML

#21246633
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36945) - you deserved it (3249)

On 08/27/2014 at 6:52pm - misc - by nayahbear24 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I bought some noise-canceling headphones. They work well. Too well. My mom came home, unpacked her shopping, walked upstairs, knocked on my door, opened my door, and found me jacking off to a porno, all without me hearing a thing. Fucking hell. FML

#21246585
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35146) - you deserved it (33824)

On 08/27/2014 at 5:50pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed. All I can remember is crying to my mom because I thought spoons were taking over the world. FML

Today, a guy in my class was talking about himself. He started his story with, "When I was little, I was a ginger." I replied without thinking, "Is that why you got put up for adoption?" Him being adopted was the actual story he wanted to tell. FML

#21246134
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19969) - you deserved it (42225)

On 08/26/2014 at 11:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kansas)

Today, while at the bakery, I stood there trying to pick between black forest and dark chocolate. The salesman said kindly, "I've heard dark chocolate helps you lose weight. Yeah, you'd definitely want dark chocolate." FML

#21245941
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33154) - you deserved it (3876)

On 08/26/2014 at 6:55pm - misc - by Lika1712 (woman) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, my boss asked me if I could work this weekend, doing the work of 2 people, for almost no extra pay. I had a weekend out with my kids planned, so I said I couldn't. My boss called it a shitty excuse, yet gave a free pass to a guy who claimed he had a "phobia of working on weekends". FML

#21245803
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36515) - you deserved it (2203)

On 08/26/2014 at 2:11pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Latvia (Riga)

Today, it's my fourth day of my trip to the USA. I've actually started keeping count of the number of times people get confused because I was born in South Africa and yet am not black. Current count: 9. FML

#21245756
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41030) - you deserved it (3499)

On 08/26/2014 at 12:22pm - misc - by WTF, guys? - United States (California)

Today, I was taking a customer's order, when she said she'd better go for a salad, because she was getting fat. She was actually very slim, so I told her she wasn't fat at all. She took one look at me and snorted "Yeah, not compared to you, that's for sure." FML

#21245733
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40934) - you deserved it (3559)

On 08/26/2014 at 11:30am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was staying in my family friend's house in France. The church bells ring every hour, which I thought was cute. Until 8 this morning where they rang 24 times. FML

#21245620
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30784) - you deserved it (3390)

On 08/26/2014 at 3:48am - misc - by hellangelrose - France



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