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djsammyc

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djsammyc

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 18 June 1999 (15 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2209
  • Number of comments : 173
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About djsammyc : hi, im sam. im a socially awkward clutz with an over active imagination. I will most likely never get published but that doesnt mean I wont try to turn my misfortune into a good laugh for you:)

djsammyc's page activity

Visits<b>seemo82</b> - yesterday at 1:54pm<b>plagiarismo</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 3:09am<b>morondon000</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 12:37am<b>RA91</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 3:27pm<b>sexymomo1234</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 2:13pm<b>pantherfan0877</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 10:21am<b>Joe_Flair</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 9:37am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 9:04am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 11/25/2014 at 4:46am<b>ShroudedKnife</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 11:53am<b>shanekicksass</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 6:41pm<b>choco_nades</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 10:47pm<b>aron1991</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 3:21am<b>LizzieC22</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 1:08am<b>michman3030</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 5:24pm<b>chingachonga</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 4:46pm<b>Kidkaplan</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 11:09pm<b>Cruzg2017</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 8:43pm

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djsammyc's favorite FMLs

Today, my boss heard a rumor that I was in a relationship with a fellow co-worker. He assured me that inside relationships weren't against any store policy, so I confirmed it. He then fired my boyfriend anyway. FML

#21318814
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25082) - you deserved it (3883)

On 12/16/2014 at 10:31pm - work - by thankssomuch - United States (Maine)

Today, a student's mother sent me an e-mail complaining that I was requiring her child to read a book containing mild profanity. She then demanded me to let him read an easier book. This would've been somewhat acceptable if the student wasn't in the 12th grade. FML

#21318762
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26649) - you deserved it (1998)

On 12/16/2014 at 9:11pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my classmate commented on how quiet I am. I responded with, "Well, nobody plots murder out loud," trying to be funny. My teacher tried to get me arrested. FML

#21318752
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27728) - you deserved it (5371)

On 12/16/2014 at 8:54pm - work - by justjoking - United States

Today, I needed to take a dump at school. As soon as I sat down, somebody else walked in. I'm extremely poop-shy, so I was forced to wait for several minutes while they styled their hair and applied makeup. After they left, I breathed a sigh of relief. Then someone else walked in. FML

#21318557
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24577) - you deserved it (5835)

On 12/16/2014 at 2:26pm - misc - by privatebathroomneeded - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to the lovely sounds of goats having escaped their pen and climbed onto the roof. Again. FML

#21318538
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23208) - you deserved it (2338)

On 12/16/2014 at 1:42pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, my parents decided to "discipline" my kitten by spraying her with water. This somehow managed to completely un-train her, and now she's back to being the compulsive biter she was when I first brought her home. FML

#21318466
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24814) - you deserved it (2704)

On 12/16/2014 at 10:01am - animals - by scars - United States (Illinois)

Today, I asked my spouse to help me apply some hemorrhoid relief cream, since I couldn't see what was going on down there clearly. Next time, I hope I'll remember if I'm still in a conference call with my online classmates so they don't witness the whole thing again. FML

Today, I blew my load in less than a minute. I wasn't having sex or even making out. I was spooning. FML

#21318416
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28252) - you deserved it (5353)

On 12/16/2014 at 7:01am - intimacy - by Extravirgin (man) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, my 5-year-old daughter was asked by her teacher to write a letter to each member of her family to read during the holidays. Her letter to me said, "Dear mommy, come on. You could have done better than dad." FML

#21318238
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27398) - you deserved it (3193)

On 12/15/2014 at 10:38pm - kids - by Lisa - United States (Missouri)

Today, my mom told me how lucky I was to inherit her "asymptomatic" periods. It's true, I don't get cramps, bloating or mood swings with my periods. Nope, just excruciatingly painful diarrhea. Thanks, mom. FML

#21318154
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26621) - you deserved it (2248)

On 12/15/2014 at 8:23pm - misc - by period_probs (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my family got into a massive argument about whether or not battery-operated toothbrushes are considered electric toothbrushes. Everyone is in their own room and refuses to talk to each other. FML

#21318050
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25357) - you deserved it (2680)

On 12/15/2014 at 5:24pm - intimacy - by thechaos (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, my classmate said I looked better without makeup. Well, her exact words were, "You look like less of a whore without makeup." FML

Today, my cat let out the biggest moan I have ever heard, while we were both in the living room. My dad heard and accused me of watching porn. FML

#21317874
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28186) - you deserved it (2429)

On 12/15/2014 at 11:07am - animals - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, I called this girl I've had a crush on for 2 years to confess my love to her. However, as she picked up the phone, I got so nervous that I froze and couldn't say a word. I was standing there, breathing heavily for 20 seconds. She got so freaked out that she threatened to call the police. FML

#21317815
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27684) - you deserved it (7401)

On 12/15/2014 at 6:59am - love - by LonelyGuy (man) - Australia

Today, my new friend tried to introduce me to "American Culture," as I am new to the city. He explained what a hamburger is and how it differs from the Asian food I was used to eating. I moved from Seattle and have worked at Burger King. FML

#21317624
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29634) - you deserved it (2245)

On 12/14/2014 at 10:30pm - misc - by AsianSensation (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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