Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

divali

Search for a member

divali

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 30 June 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1060
  • Number of comments : 24
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About divali : This member HAS filled in the description.

divali's page activity

Visits<b>TheFirstHipster</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 12:37pm<b>sybyabraham</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 8:35pm<b>alfalfalaffa</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 10:57pm<b>shivamtrivedi</b> - the 02/20/2014 at 4:03am<b>Allornone</b> - the 05/14/2013 at 11:14pm<b>Shrimpy35</b> - the 04/10/2013 at 7:17pm<b>sandman24551</b> - the 12/18/2012 at 11:26am<b>Dillonislame</b> - the 09/01/2012 at 5:13am<b>vnecksonmybed69</b> - the 05/10/2012 at 10:33pm<b>lmc94</b> - the 02/23/2012 at 12:38pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:49pm<b>twistedline</b> - the 02/17/2011 at 1:05pm<b>Dannybtw</b> - the 01/15/2011 at 8:30pm<b>jetpackzach</b> - the 01/08/2011 at 10:18pm<b>masterbaker11</b> - the 11/12/2010 at 8:01am<b>otheirrationalme</b> - the 11/10/2010 at 9:46pm<b>LaL26</b> - the 11/10/2010 at 5:50pm<b>hempat</b> - the 11/05/2010 at 6:29pm

divali's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

See all of divali's badges

divali's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to lie to my female roommate about what happened last night. She was drunk and spent half the night cuddling with me and trying to get me to kiss her. I've loved this girl for two years, but I promised her I wouldn't let her cheat on her boyfriend with anyone. Even me. FML

#16677911
338 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65355) - you deserved it (11513)

On 06/15/2011 at 2:00pm - love - by anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found out that as a supervisor, if you reprimand a female worker and end the conversation with "Now get back to making sandwiches." your boss will consider it sexism and suspend you. I work at Subway. FML

#16589228
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50326) - you deserved it (7820)

On 06/10/2011 at 1:01am - work - by MakeMeASandwich (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, Twilight once again won all the awards at MTV, beating out Inception, Toy Story 3, Harry Potter, etc. This is MY generation. FML

#16524791
575 comments

I agree, your life sucks (96998) - you deserved it (10729)

On 06/06/2011 at 2:27am - misc - by KillMeNow (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was on my third date with a really hot girl. A guy walked by singing the Pokémon theme song. She started making fun of the guy, mocking his immaturity. I joined in order to keep the conversation going. Everything was going great but then my phone rang. It was the Pokémon theme song. FML

#16435078
488 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15776) - you deserved it (74617)

On 05/31/2011 at 1:05pm - love - by chickennbenchpress (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my identical twin sister got in trouble for sneaking out of the house to see her boyfriend. My father decided to ground both of us, because it would be "too confusing" for him otherwise. FML

#16057937
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59021) - you deserved it (4668)

On 05/05/2011 at 5:04pm - kids - by Monika (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I got pulled over. Suspicious that I'd been drinking, the police officer made me walk a straight line and recite the alphabet. I failed both. I was completely sober. FML

Today, I got pulled over. Suspicious that I'd been drinking, the police officer made me walk a straight line and recite the alphabet. I failed both. I was completely sober. FML

Today, at work, I spent half an hour trying to convince an elderly customer that no, I wasn't a messenger sent by the devil to take her soul to hell. FML

#15857597
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33543) - you deserved it (3215)

On 04/20/2011 at 10:15am - work - by rawr -

Today, I went for a job interview. I was asked if I wanted a drink. I have no idea why, but I replied "a bottle of milk please." FML

#15855605
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19143) - you deserved it (29556)

On 04/20/2011 at 4:10am - work - by bham boy -

Today, my manager told me to throw out some of the old toys at the daycare we work at. I can't because I've seen Toy Story 3, and thinking about them in a dump makes me cry. I'm 28. FML

#15852392
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32932) - you deserved it (16539)

On 04/19/2011 at 10:29pm - work - by Stupid (woman) - United States

Today, I sneezed so hard I fell down the stairs. FML

#15791793
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30059) - you deserved it (7141)

On 04/15/2011 at 1:47am - misc - by HWS - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my friends sat me down and said they were concerned I was self-harming. I don't self-harm, I'm just a massive klutz. They don't believe me, and want me to get professional help. And now, because I found it all so funny, they think I'm mentally unhinged. FML

#15560826
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28801) - you deserved it (4225)

On 03/30/2011 at 1:28pm - misc - by Alisha (woman) - United Kingdom (Stirling)

Today, I woke up to a beautiful sunrise, the smell of bacon in a frying pan, and some dickhead trying to pick the lock on my front door. FML

Today, my girlfriend bought several bottles of Potassium Iodine pills and a gas mask, due to the radiation scare from Japan. We live in Texas. FML

#15409356
335 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38754) - you deserved it (6797)

On 03/21/2011 at 12:25am - health - by radiationkillz (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend was buying a new hockey stick; to test it out he started hitting a ball around the aisle and decided to shoot it back into its bin. Instead the ball hit me dead in the mouth, giving me a fat lip. Instead of consoling me, my boyfriend yelled "GOAL!" FML

#15408372
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32193) - you deserved it (6220)

On 03/20/2011 at 11:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: