dimitriibelikov

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dimitriibelikov

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 475
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About dimitriibelikov : You don't need to see my face, I'm anonymous.

dimitriibelikov's page activity

Visits<b>zzainn</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 1:03am<b>army_of_misfits</b> - the 07/13/2013 at 7:20pm<b>DeidaraAkatsuki</b> - the 06/28/2013 at 4:15pm<b>BrandonJDalley</b> - the 06/26/2013 at 6:35pm<b>georjayy</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 3:28pm<b>k4m1k4z3</b> - the 06/22/2013 at 3:16am<b>Harshdfml</b> - the 06/21/2013 at 1:30pm<b>efelsh</b> - the 06/14/2013 at 9:38pm<b>Tvolsfan325</b> - the 06/04/2013 at 12:42am<b>masonsmither</b> - the 05/30/2013 at 1:03pm<b>man_in_black08</b> - the 05/29/2013 at 8:01pm<b>FluxPavilion</b> - the 05/29/2013 at 5:17pm<b>WantsHazzasGravy</b> - the 05/29/2013 at 4:34pm<b>Joshwarrior</b> - the 05/29/2013 at 2:13pm<b>jaffvis</b> - the 05/27/2013 at 7:06pm<b>Gshelton09</b> - the 05/23/2013 at 9:10pm<b>crackmore278</b> - the 05/20/2013 at 9:25am<b>rachel_h</b> - the 05/19/2013 at 10:22am

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dimitriibelikov's favorite FMLs

Today, I cleaned up my brother's room, since he's moved out. Under the bed I found a Doritos bag full of used condoms. FML

by the_lonely_life / 06/26/2013 at 9:02pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my husband thought it would be funny to mow a penis into our lawn. I guess he forgot my parents are coming over. FML

by Anonymous / 06/25/2013 at 7:26pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while life-guarding in a 55+ community, I greeted a man by saying: "Good morning Sir!" He responded with, "Cut the shit kid, I'm not that fucking old." FML

by Anonymous / 06/25/2013 at 5:45pm / United States (New Jersey) / Work

Today, my mom confessed to me that she used to pluck my step-dad's butt hair. I hope the brain-gods delete this obnoxious mental picture. FML

by mymomplucksbutthair / 06/25/2013 at 4:43pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was bored so I began to try to convince my boyfriend that Albert Einstein was actually African-American, and that he painted himself white so he would be accepted as a scientist. Due to his competitive nature, he replied, "I already knew that babe." FML

by anonymous / 06/25/2013 at 2:12am / United States (Minnesota) / Geek

Today, my daughter's obsession with Canada got out way of hand when she was suspended for climbing up the flagpole, in an attempt to replace the flag with a red-and-white maple leaf one. FML

by VictoriaLeavitt / 06/24/2013 at 8:35pm / United States (Nevada) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was feeding some ducks. One of them choked to death on the old bread. FML

by Anonymous / 06/24/2013 at 12:41pm / Belgium / Animals

Today, my ten-year-old brother came to visit me in NYC. Within ten minutes of walking on Times Square he had seen a prostitute and a partially-naked man. He now refuses to leave my apartment and screams when I try to drag him out. He's here for the next two weeks. FML

by NYCproblems / 06/24/2013 at 10:06am / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I thought I was home alone. Likewise, my visiting grandfather thought he was alone. You can imagine the mutual surprise when I caught him stealing money from my sister's bedroom. FML

by pumboc / 06/24/2013 at 1:38am / Australia (Victoria) / Money

Today, I went on a date with a seemingly really awesome guy. It went quite well, until dessert came and he started telling me why bestiality "isn't really so wrong, you know?" Riiiggghhttt. Looks like I'm still single. FML

by kittyfiddlernono / 06/23/2013 at 3:39pm / Bulgaria (Pernik) / Love

Today, I took my cat to the vet. The creepy vet looked me in the eyes and said, "This isn't the only pussy I'll be checking out today." FML

by o_O / 06/23/2013 at 1:26pm / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous

Today, it's been weeks since some asshat started placing gnomes in my front and back yards. I resorted to setting up cameras, which I thought had deterred the idiot, until I walked into my kitchen this morning and found two gnomes on the counter. Nothing on the tapes. I'm freaking out here. FML

by ilivealoneandwhatthefuck / 06/23/2013 at 1:02pm / Guam / Miscellaneous

Today, I decided to go buy myself a dildo to use on my lonely nights. Once at the adult store, I also grabbed a birthday card to make it seem the dildo wasn't for me. At the register, the cashier looked at me and said, "For God's sake, save yourself some money. I already know it's for you." FML

by Anonymous / 06/23/2013 at 6:38am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I found out that my creepy neighbor paid a guy to install a camera in my bathroom. It's been there for three months. The guy he paid? My brother. FML

by part time all the time / 06/23/2013 at 12:37am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad invited our very cute neighbor inside to introduce him to me. I was wearing pajamas and hadn't showered in two days due to being extremely sick. FML

by Selina / 06/22/2013 at 6:59pm / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous