diceddiamonds

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diceddiamonds

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7980
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About diceddiamonds : Lol seriously fuck you all.

diceddiamonds's page activity

Visits<b>jonathan896</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 3:25pm<b>Tthug</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 1:00am<b>cuervobombz</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 7:45pm<b>boredSOLDIER</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 12:37pm<b>Darkcamzy</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 7:38pm<b>charliedee</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 2:57pm<b>HuntersCreed</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 10:31pm<b>JoshuaIsHott</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 8:58am<b>johndog699</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 6:26am<b>abdiG</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 8:39pm<b>evilamoebaattack</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 12:05am<b>tylermt1999</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 9:27am<b>tshurtz722</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 9:37pm<b>ryan5707</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 9:57pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 8:53am<b>Booda_Shun</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 1:57am<b>Dark_Zekrom</b> - the 01/29/2014 at 10:34pm<b>wilburhp</b> - the 01/18/2014 at 3:07pm

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diceddiamonds's favorite FMLs

Today, I finished moving out of my apartment and decided to clean the fridge before I left. I pulled out a drawer that I never used and was shocked to find a moldy, rotten, decayed watermelon. I remembered that I had bought a watermelon the first week I moved into the apartment. Four years ago. FML

by rydawg79 / 08/30/2009 at 2:29am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was trying to have sex with my boyfriend, David. I moaned his name and he whispered, "I'm not David." Then, with an Italian accent, he said, "It's-a-me! Mario!" FML

by Michelle / 08/28/2009 at 1:11pm / United States (Maine) / Intimacy

Today, after spending $15,000 to treat my dog's cancer over the past two months, he died of kidney failure. FML

by w-dog / 08/24/2009 at 1:33pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a double wedding with my sister. My mother, being as encouraging as she always is, told us that statistics say one of our marriages will end in divorce. She then explained she thinks it'll be mine because I'm 'a self-absorbed bitch'. FML

by Anonymous / 08/24/2009 at 7:33am / Romania (Constanta) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 6 year old daughter somehow learned about sex. She also had the open house at her school where she meets her new teachers. When the teacher asked where she came from, she said, "My daddy's happy sacks." FML

by Ben / 08/21/2009 at 5:28pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was on the elevator going up to a meeting, and the elevator was getting more and more crowded as we went up. After about ten people got on, they all agreed that I should get off the elevator because they thought me being on was exceeding the weight limit. FML

by tryingatkins / 08/21/2009 at 5:27am / United States (Virginia) / Health

Today, I saw a video of myself filmed last night, hammered, climbing my wardrobe screaming, "I WANT TO GO TO NARNIA" while naked. FML

by ShiriSarah / 08/20/2009 at 10:39am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that I'm immune to laughing gas and partially immune to novocaine while I was getting two teeth pulled. FML

by Anonymous / 08/17/2009 at 8:14pm / United States (Virginia) / Health

Today, I woke up with my girl laying next to me in bed. When she woke up we started to get hot and heavy but all of a sudden our cat hops on the bed. I guess the cat was more important cause my girl got up started playing it instead of me. Cockblocked by another pussy. FML

by Steve / 08/16/2009 at 1:04pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, at a family gathering, my aunt asked me when I was planning to have children. I'm only 16, I laughed and said not for a while, definitely not until I get married. My family shook their heads, and ignored me for the rest of the day. Apparently, teenage pregnancy is valued in my family. FML

by Anonymous / 08/15/2009 at 7:42pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I bought a freezer mug that looks like it's full of water. I've been playing tricks on my friends by throwing the empty cup at them. After doing this a few dozen times, my 83 year-old mother came to visit. I played the same trick on her. The joke's on me. My Dad filled the cup. FML

by oldtexas / 08/13/2009 at 3:27am / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous

Today, my parents decided to visit me. When I first got my apartment I gave them a key "just in case" and today they used this key to enter when I didn't answer their knocking. I didn't answer because I was having sex with my boyfriend. My parents saw everything. They didn't know I was gay. FML

by gorgeousrenthead / 08/10/2009 at 7:41pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I went to the movies with my best friend. While waiting for it to start, I went on to describe this guy I really liked and how badly I wanted to do him. Just then the girl sitting behind us leans down and says "That's my little brother. So you're the creeper he talks about." FML

by HouseMdFangirl / 08/10/2009 at 2:12am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I found what I assumed was my laptop, though my mother has the same one. As I opened it, I was greeted by a video of my father waving. He wasn't using his hands. FML

by daddysboy123 / 08/06/2009 at 11:40am / United States (Maine) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked into my new maths class. I stepped inside only to be yelled at by the teacher for nearly 15 minutes. I was then told never to enter her class again and was sent to the principal. My identical twin brother was in her class the period before me. He also has a thing for older women. FML

by slamo / 08/06/2009 at 6:10am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous