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diah

Offline (the 07/19/2015 at 7:59pm) | Search for a member

diah

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 161
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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diah's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of diah's badges

diah's favorite FMLs

Today, I got into a heated argument with my girlfriend. Not because of anything I did, but because she actually believes that pasteurization is when a pastor blesses a dairy product. "You know, like kosher." FML

#21416018
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26455) - you deserved it (2450)

On 05/26/2015 at 11:12am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was supposed to light candles at my aunt's wedding. I accidentally lit the groom on fire. FML

#21402824
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29905) - you deserved it (5558)

On 05/01/2015 at 9:41am - misc - by why? - United States

Today, my girlfriend went shopping at Victoria's Secret with me. While she was in the fitting room, her parents walked by and saw me. They don't approve of the store, so I panicked and told them I was considering becoming a woman. FML

#21255419
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44926) - you deserved it (13098)

On 09/09/2014 at 11:16pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my grandma got a new boyfriend. She dumped the old one because "His wife was taking too long to die." FML

#21195046
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53132) - you deserved it (4547)

On 07/01/2014 at 1:31pm - love - by carebear1228 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my four year old son came into the restroom while I was applying my make-up, and asked me "Mommy, are you putting on make-up so that someone will love you?" FML

Today, I was waiting in line with my boyfriend behind me. I decided to hold his hand and rub his chest while we waited. Then I heard a female voice behind me that said, "Ma'am, please don't touch me." FML

#20852134
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40775) - you deserved it (15173)

On 08/24/2013 at 11:18am - misc - by cpmolly (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I was walking home when I made eye contact with some guy, just being friendly. He then started rapping to me while pointing at his dick. FML

#20850372
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41323) - you deserved it (4231)

On 08/23/2013 at 2:23am - misc - by NotInterested (woman) - United States

Today, I had my driver's test in rural Maine. I hit a cow. FML

#20777070
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48065) - you deserved it (13550)

On 07/12/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I had my driver's test in rural Maine. I hit a cow. FML

#20777070
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48065) - you deserved it (13550)

On 07/12/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, my 14-year-old daughter came home after sneaking out and partying. She was totally drunk, and started crying on my shoulder because some boy named "Thomas" has a small dick, and she had to fake an orgasm. FML

#20419819
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84138) - you deserved it (25944)

On 12/24/2012 at 10:03pm - intimacy - by valnaj1 (woman) - Denmark (Syddanmark)

Today, while volunteering at a local homeless shelter, I asked the woman next to me how long she'd been homeless. She works there. FML

#19655540
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21049) - you deserved it (9874)

On 05/21/2012 at 1:28am - work - by HomelessGirl1 - United States (Nevada)

Today, I had to tell my mom to stop sending pictures of Jesus to my boyfriend. FML

#19052034
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32167) - you deserved it (3118)

On 02/11/2012 at 10:01pm - love - by Anon - United States (Arizona)

Today, my job at a luxurious retirement community was terminated when I ran over an old lady with my work golf cart. FML

#18852472
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7968) - you deserved it (46406)

On 01/19/2012 at 10:42am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my mom asked me to help pick out clothes for my grandma to wear in her casket. I didn't know she'd died. FML

#18646853
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33493) - you deserved it (2752)

On 12/29/2011 at 7:29pm - misc - by naomids (woman) - United States (Florida)



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