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dheh

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dheh's favorite FMLs

Today, I was watching ESPN. My boyfriend came in, bitched about "boring tv," so I handed him the remote. He put on a Lifetime movie. I must be the only woman in America with this problem. FML

#21010622
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46901) - you deserved it (4750)

On 12/30/2013 at 4:38pm - love - by smokecloud_ (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me for the first time. About 2 hours later, he got to hold my hair while I puked, also for the first time. FML

#19312067
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19985) - you deserved it (6174)

On 03/20/2012 at 1:49am - love - by notsober - United States

Today, I played Call Of Duty online against someone who turned out to be wanking. FML

#18897054
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23806) - you deserved it (6802)

On 01/24/2012 at 5:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had a job interview. The only moment I impressed the interviewer was when I talked about drama. He started to talk about a play I hadn't seen, but I decided to agree on everything he was saying. Suddenly he said, "the play doesn't actually exist." I silently left the room. FML

#17912138
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8361) - you deserved it (33155)

On 10/05/2011 at 4:33pm - work - by Lyingg (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my mum told me that my sister's little kiddie swing wouldn't hold my weight. I told her she was being stupid, and went on anyway. A broken ankle and two pins in my elbow later, I'm willing to accept this. FML

#16905617
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7534) - you deserved it (52891)

On 06/29/2011 at 2:12am - health - by Anza (woman) - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, while at work, I started to feel sick to my stomach, hot, and dizzy. My co-worker told me to go home. On the way through the locker room to get my stuff, I experienced a dizzy spell so severe, I blacked out and pooped myself. No one in the building is going to let me forget this. FML

#12646207
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30146) - you deserved it (2715)

On 08/20/2010 at 2:40pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, someone broke into my car to steal $1.50. FML

#10908235
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31227) - you deserved it (3289)

On 06/01/2010 at 2:47pm - money - by Brokeashell - United States

Today, after about a month with no sex, my girlfriend told me to come up to her room and began kissing me passionately. She got me down to my underwear before informing me that she had Spanish homework left. To make things better, upon finishing up, she went straight to sleep. FML

#9672080
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29822) - you deserved it (5266)

On 04/06/2010 at 3:10am - intimacy - by BluBaller (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was using a power drill to take down the set for the musical we just finished. My long hair got caught in the drill, got ripped out and now I have a hurting, bleeding bald spot the size of 2 quarters. FML

#8963973
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22304) - you deserved it (12341)

On 03/10/2010 at 1:11am - misc - by bdavis - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I realized that sometimes I forget to turn off my desk light when I leave the room for dinner. I also learned that said desk light can get hot enough to melt plastic, which is why my brand-new laptop screen was literally oozing onto the table top when I got back. FML

Today, after working another double shift because I want to buy my boyfriend a really expensive anniversary present, I get to his apartment to find him calculating in how many paychecks he'll be able to afford a Caribbean getaway. For himself. FML

#5798197
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28913) - you deserved it (3092)

On 10/12/2009 at 3:31pm - love - by Sucker (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I went through the car wash my boyfriend works at. When I pulled in, I explained I was Greg's girlfriend and cutely asked if I could get a free car wash. His co-worker looked at me confused and said "Greg said he didn't have a girlfriend", then he looked at me and said "Now I know why". FML

#4337553
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45228) - you deserved it (10272)

On 08/06/2009 at 3:31pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me in my front yard. As I stormed off in my dramatic exit, I realized I had locked myself outside. I had to ask my now ex-boyfriend to borrow his phone so I could call my mom. FML

#3627701
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35797) - you deserved it (8673)

On 07/10/2009 at 12:12am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I got my hair done, eyebrows waxed, and a new expensive dress to impress my boyfriend. When I got home I asked him if he noticed anything different about me. He looked at me for one minute before asking, "Did you finally start using Proactive?" FML

#3285279
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41905) - you deserved it (5217)

On 06/27/2009 at 8:55pm - love - by Acneface - Sent from mobile version

Today, my fish's tank was all green and nasty, but I had no time to clean it because I woke up late, so the job was left to my mom. When I came back, the water level seemed high, and the fish looked a little strange, so I asked my mom what she did. She said "I cleaned the tank with chlorine!" FML

#404530
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44594) - you deserved it (27907)

On 03/17/2009 at 12:34am - animals - by Poorfish (man) - United States (California)



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