dheh

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dheh

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  • Number of visits : 94
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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dheh's favorite FMLs

Today, I was watching ESPN. My boyfriend came in, bitched about "boring tv," so I handed him the remote. He put on a Lifetime movie. I must be the only woman in America with this problem. FML

by smokecloud_ / 12/30/2013 at 4:38pm / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me for the first time. About 2 hours later, he got to hold my hair while I puked, also for the first time. FML

by notsober / 03/20/2012 at 1:49am / United States / Love

Today, I played Call Of Duty online against someone who turned out to be wanking. FML

by Anonymous / 01/24/2012 at 5:39am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

Today, I had a job interview. The only moment I impressed the interviewer was when I talked about drama. He started to talk about a play I hadn't seen, but I decided to agree on everything he was saying. Suddenly he said, "the play doesn't actually exist." I silently left the room. FML

by Lyingg / 10/05/2011 at 4:33pm / United Kingdom (London) / Work

Today, my mum told me that my sister's little kiddie swing wouldn't hold my weight. I told her she was being stupid, and went on anyway. A broken ankle and two pins in my elbow later, I'm willing to accept this. FML

by Anza / 06/29/2011 at 2:12am / United Kingdom (Hampshire) / Health

Today, while at work, I started to feel sick to my stomach, hot, and dizzy. My co-worker told me to go home. On the way through the locker room to get my stuff, I experienced a dizzy spell so severe, I blacked out and pooped myself. No one in the building is going to let me forget this. FML

by Anonymous / 08/20/2010 at 2:40pm / United States (Florida) / Health

Today, someone broke into my car to steal $1.50. FML

by Brokeashell / 06/01/2010 at 2:47pm / United States / Money

Today, after about a month with no sex, my girlfriend told me to come up to her room and began kissing me passionately. She got me down to my underwear before informing me that she had Spanish homework left. To make things better, upon finishing up, she went straight to sleep. FML

by BluBaller / 04/06/2010 at 3:10am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I was using a power drill to take down the set for the musical we just finished. My long hair got caught in the drill, got ripped out and now I have a hurting, bleeding bald spot the size of 2 quarters. FML

by bdavis / 03/10/2010 at 1:11am / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized that sometimes I forget to turn off my desk light when I leave the room for dinner. I also learned that said desk light can get hot enough to melt plastic, which is why my brand-new laptop screen was literally oozing onto the table top when I got back. FML

by iplaytwister / 10/22/2009 at 5:00pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, after working another double shift because I want to buy my boyfriend a really expensive anniversary present, I get to his apartment to find him calculating in how many paychecks he'll be able to afford a Caribbean getaway. For himself. FML

by Sucker / 10/12/2009 at 3:31pm / Canada (Quebec) / Love

Today, I went through the car wash my boyfriend works at. When I pulled in, I explained I was Greg's girlfriend and cutely asked if I could get a free car wash. His co-worker looked at me confused and said "Greg said he didn't have a girlfriend", then he looked at me and said "Now I know why". FML

by Anonymous / 08/06/2009 at 3:31pm / United States (New York) / Transportation

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me in my front yard. As I stormed off in my dramatic exit, I realized I had locked myself outside. I had to ask my now ex-boyfriend to borrow his phone so I could call my mom. FML

by Anonymous / 07/10/2009 at 12:12am / United States (Connecticut) / Love

Today, I got my hair done, eyebrows waxed, and a new expensive dress to impress my boyfriend. When I got home I asked him if he noticed anything different about me. He looked at me for one minute before asking, "Did you finally start using Proactive?" FML

by Acneface / 06/27/2009 at 8:55pm / Love

Today, my fish's tank was all green and nasty, but I had no time to clean it because I woke up late, so the job was left to my mom. When I came back, the water level seemed high, and the fish looked a little strange, so I asked my mom what she did. She said "I cleaned the tank with chlorine!" FML

by Poorfish / 03/17/2009 at 12:34am / United States (California) / Animals