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Offline (the 02/23/2015 at 8:00am)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 11 September 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1068
  • Number of comments : 32
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About detectivedipsiht : 'what is it with friends and the whole, 'wanting to be in your life' thing?'

if I give you a 'fuck', it's an accident. no, really!

detectivedipsiht's page activity

Visits<b>Aukrenchi</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 4:56am<b>wheresmymary</b> - the 05/31/2015 at 12:07pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 6:20pm<b>jackroarrr</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 9:55am<b>cottoncandylips</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 10:41pm<b>Lockerch</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 9:36am<b>vivivic268</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 10:09pm<b>ally_sanderson</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 4:38pm<b>Amama</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 9:22am<b>averynicole18</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 9:10am<b>maggiefox</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 1:57am<b>Amant97</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 12:51am<b>Ditagein</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 12:50am<b>Tbear11</b> - the 11/26/2014 at 8:02pm<b>kkkkkkkkkka</b> - the 11/26/2014 at 1:18pm<b>Snowble11</b> - the 11/26/2014 at 6:04am<b>DenBriZel</b> - the 11/26/2014 at 3:29am<b>C7</b> - the 11/26/2014 at 2:08am

Fucked!<b>ally_sanderson</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 10:39pm<b>qdawg06</b> - the 11/25/2014 at 11:52pm<b>wheresmymary</b> - the 11/25/2014 at 9:01pm<b>Amant97</b> - the 11/25/2014 at 6:51pm

detectivedipsiht's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of detectivedipsiht's badges

detectivedipsiht's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me by canceling our relationship status on Facebook. I commented in disbelief, only for my dad to reply "#rekt", then "But seriously, about time. She's gonna give your balls back, right?" Thanks for the support. FML

by kumcat / 01/11/2015 at 12:57am / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I found my intoxicated step-father in our back yard trying to domesticate a stray opossum, attempting to give it steak and malt liquor. FML

by Anonymous / 01/09/2015 at 10:41pm / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, I signed into my online class, got bored, and took off my headphones to argue with my roommates about anal sex. At the end of the argument, I put my headphones back on to hear my professor asking if someone could call me to tell me to turn my damn mic off. FML

by EvilBubbles / 01/08/2015 at 10:45pm / Trinidad and Tobago (Port-of-Spain) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my girlfriend found out that I secretly watch porn while she sleeps, but she seemed to be fine with it. That's until the next day, when she got on my Facebook account and publicly shared every porn page I visit. My father even commented, "Poor choice in porn, son". FML

by Red / 12/04/2014 at 11:31am / Love

Today, I realized my anger management has hit a new low when I screamed at a goose for being a goose. FML

by WickedLittleDoll / 12/01/2014 at 11:38am / United States (North Carolina) / Animals

Today, I started to get horny while watching TV with my husband. I tried turning him on by telling him I wanted his cock. He cheerfully replied without looking away from the TV, "If only I gave a fuck, babe, if only I gave a fuck!" FML

by 404: fuck not given / 11/23/2014 at 11:34am / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy

Today, I had a dream that I kicked the moon like a soccer ball. It started swearing in my boyfriend's voice. That part wasn't a dream. FML

by Anonymous / 11/17/2014 at 5:00pm / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend broke the bed pretending to be a caterpillar. FML

by tine / 11/16/2014 at 4:44am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, my husband and I told my parents I was pregnant with my first child. The only thing my father did was look at my husband and tell him his pull out game was weak. FML

by wtfdad / 11/16/2014 at 12:29am / United States (New Jersey) / Kids

Today, someone commented on my mother's memorial page on my blog. It said "u need too get over it bitch" and "ur mum was a wh0re". I looked up the IP address and found the comment was posted from my own wifi. The only other person who lives in my house is my girlfriend. FML

by Anonymous / 11/12/2014 at 12:21pm / United Kingdom (Redcar and Cleveland) / Love

Today, my wife slapped me for touching her boobs during sex. FML

by Anonymous / 11/11/2014 at 10:37am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my dad got so drunk that he forgot my name. He started calling me "It". FML

by ItGirl / 11/08/2014 at 9:36pm / Sweden (Sodermanlands Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at my friend's Bar Mitzvah. After he finished his long-winded speech, I sarcastically did the mockingjay sign from the Hunger Games. It took a couple of seconds before I realized how that looked, and a couple more for me to be shouted down and kicked out. FML

by Anonymous / 11/08/2014 at 12:24pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I took my girlfriend for what I thought would be a romantic horse-drawn carriage ride. We didn't expect the horse to die in the middle of it. FML

by subduedbeast / 10/27/2014 at 2:48pm / United States / Love

Today, I found a book in my attic that I always read when I was a kid. For old times sake I read it again. On the very first page, child me had written, "Go to page 15" so I did. On page 15, in big red letters, it said, "Get bent". I got pranked by myself. FML

by Deadpool434 / 10/19/2014 at 3:27pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Miscellaneous