Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Offline (the 03/30/2015 at 5:30am) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 8 June 1998 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 485
  • Number of comments : 43
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About deathstroke990 : Yo I'm super boring but if you wanna talk homestuck message me.

deathstroke990's page activity

Visits<b>Chanti</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 2:45am<b>izkiz</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 6:53pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 2:19pm<b>homesuckfucker</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 12:04am<b>whatsittoyabitch</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 5:23pm<b>SpamPam</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 3:19am<b>cherrio27</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 11:59am<b>comedybreak</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 10:11am<b>RiceCrispies</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 7:19am<b>devilsADD</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 4:51am<b>martin8337</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 8:22am<b>RusticChick</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 5:53am<b>mezochan</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 12:48pm<b>nikmiester</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 8:06am<b>DrSkillz</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 1:41am<b>Wedees</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 5:27pm<b>shay_serendipity</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 4:34pm<b>anfscd</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 3:37pm

deathstroke990's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.


You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of deathstroke990's badges

deathstroke990's favorite FMLs

Today, while working at McDonald's, a guy asked me to deep fry his salad. FML


Today, I walked in on my husband jacking off to a photo of himself. FML


I agree, your life sucks (39492) - you deserved it (4251)

On 01/30/2015 at 3:16pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was being interviewed for a grant over the phone. When asked why I wanted to go to school to be an OB nursing assistant, I panicked and yelled, "BECAUSE VAGINAS ARE FASCINATING!" into the receiver. FML


I agree, your life sucks (29886) - you deserved it (12860)

On 10/27/2014 at 7:05pm - health - by lady parts - United States (Illinois)

Today, coming home, I opened up my door to find my drunk boyfriend trying to teach our three baby parakeets to perch on his erect penis. FML


I agree, your life sucks (38082) - you deserved it (4183)

On 10/15/2014 at 7:36pm - misc - by facepalm (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was sitting on a bench at the local park, eating a banana. A guy old enough to be my grandfather walked by, turned to look at me, then said "Young man, I wish I were that banana." He walked away, and I almost blacked out choking on it in shock. FML


I agree, your life sucks (38361) - you deserved it (4012)

On 09/26/2014 at 4:40pm - misc - by Operation Yewtree here I come (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my boss slapped me across the face with a raw chicken breast. FML


I agree, your life sucks (43586) - you deserved it (5236)

On 08/22/2014 at 8:05am - work - by haileelouxxx (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I found out the reason our toilet paper has been disappearing so fast recently isn't because my son is wanking like a gibbon as I first thought. He's just been using our shredder to make streamers out of the stuff, then hiding it all in a box in his closet. Fucking hell, son. FML


I agree, your life sucks (39447) - you deserved it (4313)

On 05/02/2014 at 10:04am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I was texting an artist friend telling her I wanted to buy her paintings; going on and on about how much I wanted it and loved the way they looked and couldn't wait to have them. I realized my phone had corrected paintings to panties. FML


I agree, your life sucks (40183) - you deserved it (5305)

On 03/19/2014 at 7:19pm - misc - by BigBlue (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I watched "Time of the Doctor" and I'm pretty sure my love of Doctor Who slithered out through my ear and shamefully lodged itself in the darkest corner of the room, crying. FML


I agree, your life sucks (33766) - you deserved it (8494)

On 12/26/2013 at 7:08am - love - by anon - Australia

C comme Line's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Céline's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! It’s a day of national pride over near the FML offices. There's a time for everything, and even if the desire to piss about to release the tension is huge, we mustn’t forget that we can…

Friday 27 November 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: