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deathpotato

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deathpotato
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 5 May 1990 (23 years)
  • Number of visits : 632
  • Number of comments : 78
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Keen reader – Level: student ninja

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deathpotato's favorite FMLs

Today, I discovered how startling it is to wake up by having your cat springboard off your face. The intended prey? Two fornicating geckos on the ceiling. FML

Today, my boyfriend came over to cheer me up after I'd had a sleepless night. He thought it would be a good time to propose. Unfortunately, it coincided with me yawning. FML

#19039912
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21542) - you deserved it (4322)

On 02/10/2012 at 4:37am - love - by ohgodwhy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had to explain to this really intimidating girl that I wasn't giving her a dirty look, and that it was just my face at rest. FML

#19018819
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16854) - you deserved it (1830)

On 02/07/2012 at 3:39pm - misc - by Emily (woman) - United States

Today, my mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then informed me that, for as long as my girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML

#18733573
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19017) - you deserved it (37903)

On 01/07/2012 at 5:27am - intimacy - by Danny - Australia

Today, my racist grandmother was complaining that the new nurse at her nursing home is a black woman. I casually asked, "Is she cute?" I'm now out of the will. FML

#18641039
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27652) - you deserved it (6485)

On 12/29/2011 at 1:47am - misc - by Snurkles McGree (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, we found out where our daughter had been hiding her crayons. We also found out why our stereo stopped working. FML

#18619223
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16792) - you deserved it (1926)

On 12/26/2011 at 9:24pm - kids - by Peter - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was trying to get my boyfriend in the mood so I held his hands against the bed, and whispered, "Have you been a bad boy?" Thinking he'd say something kinky back, he replied "Yes Santa" then burst out laughing. FML

#18134142
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27068) - you deserved it (13336)

On 11/01/2011 at 10:36pm - intimacy - by HOe HOe HOe (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I noticed how big my brother's package is. If it hadn't been for the fact that my family has taken up walking around naked half the day, I never would have had to. FML

#17594618
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24690) - you deserved it (2691)

On 08/27/2011 at 12:09pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my dog was barking at a squirrel in the yard. I opened the door to let him chase the squirrel. I went to look at the dead squirrel and found out it was the neighbor's chihuahua. FML

#15714709
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18794) - you deserved it (32154)

On 04/09/2011 at 8:58pm - animals - by Sid (man) - United States (California)



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