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deathpotato

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deathpotato
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 5 May 1990 (23 years)
  • Number of visits : 628
  • Number of comments : 78
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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deathpotato's favorite FMLs

Today, the rollercoaster I was on stuck upside down for a few minutes. I shat myself in terror. Then, gravity took effect. FML

#20480979
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36811) - you deserved it (8940)

On 01/27/2013 at 6:10am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was walking in the freezing rain when a guy asked me if I wanted to share his umbrella with him. I grinned and told him I did. He then noticed a pretty girl walking behind me and he abruptly turned to her and asked her the same question. FML

#20104191
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22138) - you deserved it (1763)

On 10/06/2012 at 11:52am - misc - by FML_Elle - United States

Today, I wanted to surprise my long distance girlfriend by flying to her unannounced. When I arrived at her house, her family tells me that she herself boarded an unannounced flight to where I lived hours ago. Surprise. FML

#20103950
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27635) - you deserved it (3143)

On 10/06/2012 at 6:04am - love - by Jex (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my boyfriend told me he masturbates to the thought of me swimming in pancake syrup. FML

#20094500
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27379) - you deserved it (4837)

On 09/30/2012 at 12:37am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I bought a pack of toothpicks. There were 500 of them. When I got home I accidentally dropped the pack. After twenty long minutes of picking them up, I dropped them again. FML

#20042606
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20305) - you deserved it (10212)

On 08/26/2012 at 12:20pm - misc - by S. (woman) - Estonia

Today, I walked into a public restroom to find that they had set up a free health clinic for the homeless; by that I mean that I found one bum inspecting and cleaning the infected, bloody genitals of another bum. FML

#19531341
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22413) - you deserved it (2229)

On 04/26/2012 at 8:08am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was watching a boys volleyball team warming up, and I had my eye on one of them who was quite attractive. He sent the ball a little too far and it hit me in the face. He apologized, and I then for some reason replied with, "It's fine, I like balls in my face." FML

#19475030
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14684) - you deserved it (25578)

On 04/15/2012 at 9:13pm - intimacy - by lifeonfire12 (woman) - Canada

Today, after years of secretly faking my orgasms, my husband gave me my first real one. Afterward was also the first time he ever accused me of faking it because, "It was different from all the other times." FML

#19423040
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10966) - you deserved it (35535)

On 04/07/2012 at 11:27am - intimacy - by anonomous - United States

Today, after having been told that I looked horrible for the last five months, I decided to give myself a make-over. As soon as the make-up artist was done, I told her I didn't like it, and that I still didn't like how I look. She simply replied: ''Well, I'm a make-up artist, not a magician!'' FML

#19411148
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12049) - you deserved it (21755)

On 04/05/2012 at 8:36am - misc - by Anonymous - Netherlands

Today, while at a store, my stuttering problem became so bad the poor store clerk had to supply my own words for me. FML

#19397276
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18500) - you deserved it (1469)

On 04/02/2012 at 8:32pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to re-grade a student's assignments because neither he, nor his parents can read "Spanish." I'd written in cursive. FML

#19324505
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25723) - you deserved it (3406)

On 03/22/2012 at 1:13am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I decided to hit on a very attractive girl. I guess I was too drunk to remember it was my family reunion. FML

#19299263
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7594) - you deserved it (39822)

On 03/18/2012 at 7:41am - love - by Austin Franklin - United States

Today, a little girl looked at me and yelled "Mommy look, there's a real leprechaun!" FML

#19296318
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18852) - you deserved it (1691)

On 03/17/2012 at 8:48pm - kids - by Redhead4life (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to Hooters for lunch. My food was brought to me by a man. FML

#19288594
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20801) - you deserved it (12870)

On 03/16/2012 at 1:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, after months of teaching my parrot to speak, he finally demonstrated his abilities. I accidentally set off my smoke detector, and he's been wailing like a dying banshee ever since. FML

#19260934
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19938) - you deserved it (3118)

On 03/11/2012 at 11:04pm - animals - by weep weep weep (man) - United States (Florida)



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