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deathburger13

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deathburger13
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7179
  • Number of comments : 37
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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deathburger13's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend of 4 years proposed to me. I said yes and he gave me an engagement ring. He immediately went to call his mom to tell her the happy news. After the phone call, he asked if he could return the ring because his mom needed money. FML

#5110290
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49443) - you deserved it (3284)

On 09/07/2009 at 6:08pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, my friends and I went to the beach and we were tanning when I suddenly saw 10 roses floating in the ocean. I went around to pick up all the roses and threw the petals at my friends. Then I notice a big boat of people in black and white were looking at me with disgust. It was a funeral. FML

#5087791
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14791) - you deserved it (46043)

On 09/06/2009 at 7:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was fired from my job. I was a lifeguard and the other day a 30 year old man who only spoke spanish hit on me. I'm 16 and politely rejected him. He then went to the front desk and told them how I tried molesting him in the locker room. FML

#5082390
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40656) - you deserved it (1908)

On 09/06/2009 at 2:23pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got my renewed driver's license. It clearly indicates 'Sex: F'. My beard and penis beg to differ. FML

#5081396
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42958) - you deserved it (3335)

On 09/06/2009 at 1:10pm - misc - by HeShe (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was using a Kodak Picture Maker in Walmart. I needed help using the machine so the lady that works there came over and tried to load my pictures. I heard some snickering behind me from the people in line. Turns out the pictures loaded. Even the nude ones I forgot about. FML

#5064237
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5277) - you deserved it (32452)

On 09/05/2009 at 5:14pm - misc - by indecentcameraexposure (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I was at a party when I got covered in the liquid from a glow stick. Thinking it wasn't a big deal I went to rub it off, but it stuck to my clothes. The cops came so everyone ran and hid in the bushes because we were all drunk. The cops arrested fifteen people because I glowed. FML

#5063911
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13477) - you deserved it (39592)

On 09/05/2009 at 4:54pm - misc - by Idiots (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my dentist asked me about my fillings, so I told him that when I was younger, I had 2 cavities. He replied, "No you didn't. I just looked at your x-rays." Turns out my old dentist ripped me off. I never needed fillings. FML

#5061381
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38569) - you deserved it (1884)

On 09/05/2009 at 2:16pm - health - by itsjustnotfair (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was talking to my boyfriend on the way to meet him. While chatting, I told him that I had a rip in my favorite jeans. When he sympathetically apologized, I said "It's okay, you're just going to take them off in a minute, anyway." I forgot my mom was in the car. FML

#5057922
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9230) - you deserved it (61763)

On 09/05/2009 at 9:39am - love - by leahbeuhh (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, my girlfriend, her grandma, and I were leaving her house to eat lunch. I stubbed my toe on the door while exiting. It hurt, so I stood there shortly in pain. I heard my girlfriend's grandma call me a "pansy". I later saw blood and took off my shoe. My whole toenail had come off of my big toe. FML

#5053287
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42069) - you deserved it (2912)

On 09/05/2009 at 12:57am - misc - by HotCurry (man) - United States

Today, before class I was trying to prove I can twist myself like the people on the front of my anatomy textbook, I got onto a table and twisted my ankles behind my head. Everyone seemed impressed until I farted so loudly that it echoed in the hallway. I couldn't get my legs unstuck. FML

#5050946
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13618) - you deserved it (42491)

On 09/04/2009 at 11:07pm - misc - by flexibleflatulance (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, was a nice day, so I opened the sunroof and all the windows in my car. My hair started flying around and at one point it went out the sunroof. My friends thought it would be funny to close my hair in the sunroof. They laughed until they couldn't open it up again. It short-circuited. FML

#5043249
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36517) - you deserved it (2701)

On 09/04/2009 at 4:10pm - misc - by badhairday (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went to a carnival. While walking around with my cousin, I saw a one hundred dollar bill on the ground. Just before I stepped on it, a man grabbed it. His words? "Don't you just hate it when that happens?" And he walked away. FML

#5041996
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34151) - you deserved it (3902)

On 09/04/2009 at 2:41pm - misc - by bubblezzz123 - United States (New York)

Today, I was awakened by the sound of chain-saws. Moments later a tree branch came through my roof. FML

#5040554
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40458) - you deserved it (1713)

On 09/04/2009 at 12:46pm - misc - by 1ndustrytx (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went para sailing for the first time ever. My friends thought it would be funny to pull down my trunks right before my feet left the boat. I dangled there in the air for the whole resort to see. And I lost my shorts in the ocean. FML

#5039169
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37991) - you deserved it (2801)

On 09/04/2009 at 10:50am - misc - by no_hullabalo (man) - Taiwan (T'ai-wan)

Today, I was talking to my mom about when I have kids. I told her I may want two or three. She immediately cut me off and told me to stick to one, and that any more than that will be a burden. I am the second born child of my family. FML

#5035693
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34166) - you deserved it (2973)

On 09/04/2009 at 2:30am - misc - by pandabear93 - United States (Arizona)



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