deadeyedex

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deadeyedex

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 20 October 1996 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 649
  • Number of comments : 35
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About deadeyedex : I'm Jason and I am always listening to Eminem im on FML alot cuz I'm always bored so message me

deadeyedex's page activity

Visits<b>wallac7</b> - the 03/14/2016 at 1:52am<b>redstone7693</b> - the 12/06/2015 at 11:47am<b>Envy22</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 12:03am<b>Driving_Gaming</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 1:18pm<b>joebagz</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 8:25pm<b>teentee401</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 10:12pm<b>lil_ham1644</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 3:20pm<b>PurelyCanadian</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 2:06am<b>HeatherFeatherB</b> - the 03/25/2014 at 11:45pm<b>JandTaco</b> - the 02/28/2014 at 3:44pm<b>neonvortex</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 5:29am<b>forshey13</b> - the 10/24/2013 at 10:43pm<b>lillord55</b> - the 10/22/2013 at 3:02pm<b>Booda_Shun</b> - the 10/11/2013 at 2:10pm<b>chilltime</b> - the 08/04/2013 at 9:02pm<b>BojangusXD</b> - the 07/20/2013 at 2:28am<b>maddiiee00</b> - the 06/02/2013 at 11:15pm<b>stevenJB</b> - the 03/07/2013 at 11:56am

deadeyedex's FML badges

Consolation prize

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Socialite

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Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

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deadeyedex's favorite FMLs

Today, I baked some regular brownies for my friend. Just to mess with him, after he ate some, I said they had weed in them. He trashed my room in anger, and still won't believe me when I tell him that I didn't actually slip him any drugs. FML

by mateyouremental / 12/21/2012 at 3:48pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that the only reason my boyfriend got a job was so that he could buy weed. FML

by hopeless / 07/06/2012 at 1:46am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to a glorious sunrise. I stood up, took a moment to soak up some sunlight, and then spent the next hour too scared to go make my morning coffee, after my mother loudly moaned, "Ah yeah, give it to me, Woody!" from down the hall. FML

by huh / 06/02/2012 at 4:31pm / United Kingdom (South Ayrshire) / Intimacy

Today, I brought my 90-year-old grandfather into school for a project that required to bring in "a first-hand account" of the Great Depression. He started off by telling the class how in his day, they "threw rocks at black people." FML

by Class / 05/11/2012 at 7:52pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom walked in on me masturbating. She didnt look away and we stared at each other for a while; then she asked me what I wanted from McDonalds. FML

by ShadowJack / 04/29/2012 at 11:10am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was at a party, when the cops busted us. Since I'm underage, I hid behind a chair for an hour and a half while they breathalyzed everyone and sat them in the same room I was in. The cops left, everyone realized I was behind the chair, and now my nickname is "Anne Frank". FML

by Anonymous / 04/12/2012 at 2:31pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I repeatedly screamed so loudly and with such emotion at a video game, that my neighbours thought I was in trouble and called the police. FML

by thatscreamerguy / 04/03/2012 at 7:11am / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Geek

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated, and he started to go down on me. In excitement, I accidentally drove a knee into his face. No amount of fondling his diddlestick made him forgive me for his bloody nose and swollen eye. FML

by Anonymous / 03/16/2012 at 4:23pm / Ireland / Intimacy

Today, I dropped a knife while cooking. Luckily it missed my foot, but only because it hit my knee. FML

by jmac / 03/10/2012 at 10:06pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, I found out that my desk is perfectly placed so that my boss can shoot me with a Nerf gun from his office. FML

by Anonymous / 02/19/2012 at 9:42pm / United States / Work

Today, I found out that my favorite song since I was a small child is actually about anal sex and delaying an orgasm. FML

by Anonymoosey / 02/19/2012 at 6:47pm / Canada / Intimacy

Today, I received a cute letter in my locker. It was in German, so I used Google translate. Apparently, someone hopes I choke on big fat cock. FML

by kittens go meow / 02/14/2012 at 7:35pm / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy

Today, I got pulled over. When the cop asked where I was coming from, reflexively I said, "Your mom's house." FML

Today, I cracked a rib coughing. FML

by anonymous / 02/13/2012 at 6:32am / United States / Health

Today, I received a parking fine for $147. My car isn't even worth that much. FML

by jam / 02/11/2012 at 2:03am / Australia / Transportation