Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

deLongenator

Search for a member

deLongenator
  • Town/Country : bd, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 17 August 1995 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 384
  • Number of comments : 24
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About deLongenator : Get on here on my iPod a lot. I love Tom DeLonge and every band he is involved with. He's my hero and love of my life.

deLongenator's last visitors

Tara115alexmac222CrowntheHorizonDizzyRamoneSayPeanutsNikoTheMan

deLongenator's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of deLongenator's badges

deLongenator's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend texted me, saying, "I'm running a bath. Wanna come over and learn about water displacement?" I excitedly drove over, thinking he wanted to have some fun. No, he really did want to teach me about water displacement. FML

#20047830
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29422) - you deserved it (5864)

On 08/29/2012 at 12:38pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my cheating, psycho asscricket of an ex texted me and asked me back out. I said no, and didn't think any more of it, at least until an hour later, when I looked out my window, only to see him smearing a bag of dog crap all over my porch. FML

#20020463
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20824) - you deserved it (1681)

On 08/14/2012 at 11:02am - love - by WELLFUCKYOUTOO (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend told me that he believes getting kicked in the balls is a scientifically-proven method of birth control. FML

#19428378
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17774) - you deserved it (2603)

On 04/08/2012 at 6:37am - intimacy - by Jordan - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, during an Easter egg hunt, I found divorce papers. FML

#19428226
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29018) - you deserved it (1705)

On 04/08/2012 at 5:16am - love - by claudio117 - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, two drop dead gorgeous Australians asked me for directions. Being so shocked by their beauty and accents, I couldn't get words out of my mouth. The one said to the other "Nope she doesn't speak English", then walked away. FML

#19337051
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17223) - you deserved it (8650)

On 03/24/2012 at 2:45am - misc - by jennag5 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was at the park with my friends. We were all having fun on the swings, when out of nowhere I heard a thud, followed by a child crying. Turns out I accidentally kicked him in the head. FML

#19308008
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20394) - you deserved it (6729)

On 03/19/2012 at 4:18pm - kids - by Evelyn - United States

Today, while I was cuddling with my girlfriend, she looked at me and leaned in. Thinking she was going to kiss me, I leaned too. Just as we were about to kiss, she screamed "COW KISSES" and somehow managed to lick my eyeball. FML

#19297004
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22411) - you deserved it (3981)

On 03/17/2012 at 10:32pm - love - by Brian - United States (Washington)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: