Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

davincidasecond

Online | Search for a member

davincidasecond

5Fucked!

davincidasecond
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 1 February 1993 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4452
  • Number of comments : 587
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 14 posted

About davincidasecond : Weeeeell, I'm a:
Senior in college.
Rugby player/fan.
Comic book geek.
Guy who comes on FML to laugh.

Just a few things (out of thousands) to know about me. Feel free to shoot a message. But please, no creepers.

davincidasecond's page activity

Visits<b>thatonelosergirl</b> - 24 hours ago<b>kukumber</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 4:28pm<b>Ashd09</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 1:46pm<b>The_Curvy_Girl</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 9:33am<b>blade9502</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 7:43am<b>Salvanoi</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 7:39am<b>jenpearl</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 6:17am<b>clairesucks</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 4:35am<b>ThatOtherMegan</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 10:44am<b>disasterlydeed</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 7:31pm<b>EddySaBoy</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 2:05pm<b>kylie31</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 9:18am<b>RealSuperSand</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 3:05pm<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 10:27pm<b>jfreeman86</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 2:49am<b>TiddlesWiddles</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 3:49pm<b>toasty_narwals</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 4:22am<b>Mitchellbassists</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 7:20pm

Fucked!<b>RealSuperSand</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 9:05pm<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 4:27am<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 8:01am<b>_mittlieder_</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 4:23am<b>zBerryz</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 6:24am

davincidasecond's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of davincidasecond's badges

davincidasecond's favorite FMLs

Today, I overheard my dad telling his friends that the only way I'll ever sleep with a woman is with the help of Rohypnol. FML

#21292660
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27274) - you deserved it (2667)

On 11/05/2014 at 11:54am - misc - by chlorobitch551 (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I burned my hand while making breakfast. As I staggered around the kitchen in agony, looking for some burn cream, my cat figured he'd latch onto said hand and drag his claws through the burn. FML

Today, my ex sent me a pack of beer to screw with me. I'm still going to AA, and I thought I was almost over it. Five bottles later, I realized I'm not. We didn't break up over my drinking, either; it was because after just 2 weeks of dating, she threatened to kill herself if I didn't marry her. FML

#21292603
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35907) - you deserved it (3685)

On 11/05/2014 at 8:57am - health - by AAnonymous (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, my boyfriend came home from college for the first time in weeks just to visit me. I was so excited that I spent two hours getting ready. Turns out he was only coming back to dump me. Now I'm single and out of foundation. FML

#21292231
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37317) - you deserved it (3928)

On 11/04/2014 at 8:16pm - love - by single pringle - United States (New Jersey)

Today, army recruiters came to my school and set up some punching bags to attract potential recruits. I gave it a shot, managing to set the highest score at my school and fracture my wrist at the same time. FML

#21291962
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32556) - you deserved it (6561)

On 11/04/2014 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I've been one year sober. My health has improved a lot, unlike my social life, which has died a horrible, lonely death. FML

#21286990
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31811) - you deserved it (4420)

On 10/28/2014 at 2:04pm - health - by not drunk (woman) - Brazil (Rio Grande do Sul)

Today, I was getting a pedicure to cheer myself up. I've been so lonely, I got overly excited when someone sat next to me, because I got to pretend I had a friend. FML

#21286908
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31948) - you deserved it (3891)

On 10/28/2014 at 10:07am - misc - by bottombarrel - United States (Ohio)

Today, I hit a new low point in my life when I stole batteries from a toy at the daycare I work at, and put them in my vibrator. FML

#21286701
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26432) - you deserved it (34629)

On 10/27/2014 at 11:40pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, I took my girlfriend for what I thought would be a romantic horse-drawn carriage ride. We didn't expect the horse to die in the middle of it. FML

#21286332
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49355) - you deserved it (3482)

On 10/27/2014 at 2:48pm - love - by subduedbeast - United States

Today, my friend drove up a parking lot and I unbuckled my seatbelt as soon as we were parked. He then suddenly saw a better spot right in front and moved his car. When I got out, a police officer approached me, saying I wasn't wearing my seatbelt. I was fined for that. FML

Today, I stumbled across one of my son's English assignments. Apparently, he decided to submit a haiku about how electrical outlets are technically "whores" because they hook up with countless cords for a "charge." I don't know whether to be amused or furious. FML

#21285975
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32842) - you deserved it (4582)

On 10/26/2014 at 10:42pm - kids - by MySonThePoet (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my boyfriend and I tried roleplaying a teacher-student during sex. We're both studying to be actors, so we ended up going into a really deep, emotional storyline that didn't end in sex at all. FML

#21284275
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37796) - you deserved it (10995)

On 10/24/2014 at 6:54am - intimacy - by too good - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, I was passing notes in class with my crush. I started to pour my heart out and tell him about how I've liked him for years. I was caught by the teacher. He looked at it, laughed, and tore it up. He then looked at me and said, "I just saved you from years of embarrassment. You're welcome." FML

#21283544
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39644) - you deserved it (10624)

On 10/23/2014 at 12:04am - love - by Rachel - United States (Ohio)

Today, I had sex for the first time with my first boyfriend. We broke up 6 years ago. FML

Today, my 17-year-old son managed to easily convince my 13-year-old daughter that if you have sex before getting married, you'll instantly get horrible diseases that will kill you. Her freaking out is how I found out she's not only gullible as hell, but sexually active as well. FML

#21283066
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41430) - you deserved it (5537)

On 10/22/2014 at 12:09pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)



FML's blog

  • Tania's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! How are you all doing? This week has been quite eventful for some people. Uber has been causing taxi drivers here and there to get their knickers in a twist, notable over here in France, which caused…

Friday 26 June 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: