davidflake

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davidflake

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 1 June 1985 (31 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 149
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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davidflake's page activity

Visits<b>fooad444</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 10:54am<b>toasty_narwals</b> - the 11/16/2013 at 11:26pm<b>sarahperez</b> - the 11/10/2013 at 12:35pm<b>Drag0nb0rn</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 4:03pm<b>ervnomyous</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 4:07pm<b>Dany93</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 10:29am<b>chloeville</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 9:34am<b>Llama_Face89</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 6:29am<b>Das_is_gud</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 6:27am

davidflake's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of davidflake's badges

davidflake's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally got my driver's permit. To celebrate, my parents decided to go to a bar and make me wait in the car because I'm now the designated driver. FML

by Anonymous / 10/21/2013 at 6:57am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my brother accidentally hit me in the throat. After I stopped coughing, choking, and feeling like I was going to die, he came back into my room, quietly said "I know your weakness," and left. FML

by Anonymous / 02/23/2013 at 1:28am / United States (Colorado) / Health

Today, I was walking my dog when he decided that he was too lazy to continue walking. It ended up with me looking like a crazy dog lady carrying my medium-sized dog home. FML

by life// / 01/08/2013 at 6:56pm / Canada (Alberta) / Animals

Today, I walked into the kitchen at 5 am, to have my 7 and 9 year olds throw a bucket of water on me. To their surprise and horror, I didn't melt. FML

by Nickki / 10/14/2012 at 10:57am / United States / Kids

Today, I realized that my boyfriend really does have a problem with my upper-lip hair. I woke up this morning to him ripping a wax strip off of my face. All he could say after I stopped shrieking was that he had hoped it wouldn't wake me up. FML

by WaxOnWaxOff / 09/06/2012 at 5:50pm / United States (Colorado) / Love

Today, I was watching Free Willy with my boyfriend. It was at the part where the boy leaned into the water to give Willy a hug. I asked, "How do you even hug a whale?" My boyfriend rolled over and gave me a hug, and said, "Like this." FML

by leigh2812 / 01/05/2010 at 5:03pm / Love

Today, while cleaning up, I dropped a box of thumbtacks, spilling them all over the floor. As I fumbled to pick them up, the power went out. FML

by Ouchies / 10/01/2009 at 6:31pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was trying to have sex with my boyfriend, David. I moaned his name and he whispered, "I'm not David." Then, with an Italian accent, he said, "It's-a-me! Mario!" FML

by Michelle / 08/28/2009 at 1:11pm / United States (Maine) / Intimacy