Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

davidflake

Search for a member

davidflake

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 1 June 1985 (29 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 47
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

davidflake's page activity

Visits<b>toasty_narwals</b> - the 11/16/2013 at 11:26pm<b>sarahperez</b> - the 11/10/2013 at 12:35pm<b>Drag0nb0rn</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 4:03pm<b>ervnomyous</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 4:07pm<b>Dany93</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 10:29am<b>chloeville</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 9:34am<b>Llama_Face89</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 6:29am<b>Das_is_gud</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 6:27am

davidflake's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of davidflake's badges

davidflake's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally got my driver's permit. To celebrate, my parents decided to go to a bar and make me wait in the car because I'm now the designated driver. FML

#20928623
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44311) - you deserved it (4319)

On 10/21/2013 at 6:57am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my brother accidentally hit me in the throat. After I stopped coughing, choking, and feeling like I was going to die, he came back into my room, quietly said "I know your weakness," and left. FML

#20518354
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30295) - you deserved it (2972)

On 02/23/2013 at 1:28am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was walking my dog when he decided that he was too lazy to continue walking. It ended up with me looking like a crazy dog lady carrying my medium-sized dog home. FML

#20448490
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25630) - you deserved it (4606)

On 01/08/2013 at 6:56pm - animals - by life// (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I walked into the kitchen at 5 am, to have my 7 and 9 year olds throw a bucket of water on me. To their surprise and horror, I didn't melt. FML

#20116347
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22629) - you deserved it (3066)

On 10/14/2012 at 10:57am - kids - by Nickki - United States

Today, I realized that my boyfriend really does have a problem with my upper-lip hair. I woke up this morning to him ripping a wax strip off of my face. All he could say after I stopped shrieking was that he had hoped it wouldn't wake me up. FML

#20060710
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20309) - you deserved it (8713)

On 09/06/2012 at 5:50pm - love - by WaxOnWaxOff - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was watching Free Willy with my boyfriend. It was at the part where the boy leaned into the water to give Willy a hug. I asked, "How do you even hug a whale?" My boyfriend rolled over and gave me a hug, and said, "Like this." FML

#7165792
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35726) - you deserved it (12793)

On 01/05/2010 at 5:03pm - love - by leigh2812 - Sent from mobile version

Today, while cleaning up, I dropped a box of thumbtacks, spilling them all over the floor. As I fumbled to pick them up, the power went out. FML

#5589145
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44073) - you deserved it (3287)

On 10/01/2009 at 6:31pm - misc - by Ouchies (woman) - United States (Florida) - moderated by Kevin Nealon

Today, I was trying to have sex with my boyfriend, David. I moaned his name and he whispered, "I'm not David." Then, with an Italian accent, he said, "It's-a-me! Mario!" FML

#4882481
346 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62986) - you deserved it (16004)

On 08/28/2009 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by Michelle (woman) - United States (Maine)



FML's blog

  • Gragrou's illustrated FML
  • One day, cats will rule the world, but not today, there's a bit of tin foil stuck under the couch. The Internet and cats is quite the love story, everybody knows that. A very serious study that was done…

Friday 26 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: