davexbro

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Offline (the 04/23/2016 at 1:16am)

davexbro

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 659
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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davexbro's favorite FMLs

Today, I started my job as a driving instructor. My first client showed up piss drunk. FML

by Anonymous / 06/14/2014 at 8:34pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Work

Today, I got home late from work, so I decided to make myself a microwave meal. I pierced the plastic film several times. A little too loudly for my hateful bastard of a neighbor, I guess, because he called the cops on me, claiming he heard gunshots from my apartment. FML

by fuck you, jack / 03/04/2014 at 3:44pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, after babysitting, the parents actually tried to pay me in Trident Layers Gum. FML

by iwantmoney / 07/21/2011 at 8:20pm / United States (Ohio) / Money

Today, I was given a DUI while in the Whataburger drive thru. FML

by Anonymous / 07/16/2011 at 7:09pm / United States / Transportation

Today, I caught a cab to take me to a hospital appointment. The driver turned around and told me I was in the Cash Cab. I got really excited and screamed. That is, until she laughed and said, "Just kidding. I always wanted to do that to someone." FML

by Anonymous / 07/15/2011 at 10:06pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I caught a cab to take me to a hospital appointment. The driver turned around and told me I was in the Cash Cab. I got really excited and screamed. That is, until she laughed and said, "Just kidding. I always wanted to do that to someone." FML

by Anonymous / 07/15/2011 at 10:06pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dog was scooped up by an owl. FML

by flipnazn / 07/15/2011 at 12:24am / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, I got into my first car accident. I side swiped the truck next to me merging into another lane. He was in my blind spot. It was a cop. FML

by bym5052 / 07/14/2011 at 8:28pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Transportation

Today, while babysitting a five year old, I found a cartoon called Metalocalypse for him to watch while I made dinner. I didn't realize it was an "adult" cartoon until afterwards. He watched a whole episode about a clown with a cocaine problem. FML

by dummy / 07/11/2011 at 3:21pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Kids

Today, I received a $50 iTunes card for my birthday. I immediately sat down at my computer and starting buying all my newest favorites. Then I realized I never redeemed my card so the $50 was all charged to my account. FML

by brokeaf / 07/11/2011 at 3:09pm / United States / Money

Today, I had to dig up my twin boys birth certificates for baseball registration. Turns out I had been calling both of them by the other twin's name for eight and a half years. FML

by beekeke45 / 06/25/2011 at 9:39am / United States (New Hampshire) / Kids

Today, my brother thought it would be funny to disable my iPod Touch for 45 minutes. After 45 minutes, I went to enter my password. I missed a number accidentally. 50 minutes to go. FML

by iDisable / 06/18/2011 at 8:27pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, my brother thought it would be funny to disable my iPod Touch for 45 minutes. After 45 minutes, I went to enter my password. I missed a number accidentally. 50 minutes to go. FML

by iDisable / 06/18/2011 at 8:27pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was given a new nickname at work due to my boss always confusing me with one of my co-workers who is taller than me. Someone suggested he just call us the same name to make it simpler, and the tall one would be big and the short one little. Everyone at my job now calls me Little Dick. FML

by lilben / 06/10/2011 at 4:09am / United States (California) / Work

Today, I was given a new nickname at work due to my boss always confusing me with one of my co-workers who is taller than me. Someone suggested he just call us the same name to make it simpler, and the tall one would be big and the short one little. Everyone at my job now calls me Little Dick. FML

by lilben / 06/10/2011 at 4:09am / United States (California) / Work