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datshistylizard1

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datshistylizard1

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  • Number of visits : 943
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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datshistylizard1's page activity

Visits<b>kitcat517</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 6:22pm

datshistylizard1's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

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datshistylizard1's favorite FMLs

Today, I went on a date. I took her out to an expensive steak house. When she was done eating, she got up, said she was married, and told me she only accepted the date because I'd be paying for it. FML

#21301400
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39011) - you deserved it (3320)

On 11/18/2014 at 1:57pm - misc - by steak through the heart - United States (California)

Today, I told my mom that my boyfriend, who I've been living with for a year, and I were moving to another state at the end of the month. I told her in a restaurant, over lunch, where she then just got up and left me there without saying a word. FML

Today, my father told me to "go get a job". He has been unemployed for 3 years. FML

#21300409
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26530) - you deserved it (2714)

On 11/16/2014 at 10:52pm - work - by username - United States (Indiana)

Today, my teacher "busted" me for writing down answers on my arm for a test. The so called "answers" was just a duck my little nephew had drawn on my hand the night before. She's actually trying to get me suspended over it. FML

#21298328
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34167) - you deserved it (2059)

On 11/13/2014 at 1:17pm - misc - by really - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my mum was in a bad mood, so I tried to cheer her up by telling her I love her, and giving her a hug. She slapped me hard enough to leave a red, hand-shaped mark on my face, and told me to fuck off with my "sarcasm". FML

#21293904
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36726) - you deserved it (3168)

On 11/07/2014 at 3:03am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, I was a pregnant man for Halloween. Everyone at school thought it was funny, except my principal, who gave me a detention and said it was, "inappropriate and making a pregnant teacher feel uncomfortable". That pregnant teacher asked me to take a selfie with her. FML

#21289257
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34469) - you deserved it (2148)

On 10/31/2014 at 7:28pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, my friend took our prank war too far when he secretly added peanuts to my food. I have a peanut allergy. FML

#21289188
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33975) - you deserved it (2772)

On 10/31/2014 at 5:12pm - health - by peanutprobs - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, my little sister decided to color-in my favorite black-and-white comic book. It was worth over $200. When I told my mother, she said, "Oh that old thing? I thought it was a stupid coloring book you were too stupid to color." FML

#21287570
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37750) - you deserved it (3609)

On 10/29/2014 at 9:09am - kids - by NoColor (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my friend drove up a parking lot and I unbuckled my seatbelt as soon as we were parked. He then suddenly saw a better spot right in front and moved his car. When I got out, a police officer approached me, saying I wasn't wearing my seatbelt. I was fined for that. FML

Today, my son asked for my help with a personal matter. I was flattered that he trusted me, since he's a paranoid, untrusting psycho. Turned out he wanted to use my locksmith skills to break into his ex's house and "teach her a lesson" for breaking up with him after he cheated on her. FML

#21285546
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33196) - you deserved it (4516)

On 10/26/2014 at 9:54am - kids - by Bob H. (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was shopping at my workplace, out of uniform, with my husband. A customer recognised me and wanted me to serve him, but I couldn't since we can be fired for doing so while off-duty. He complained to my manager, who wasted no time publicly bitching me out. FML

#21285416
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33471) - you deserved it (2150)

On 10/26/2014 at 1:53am - work - by iskiel (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was giving lifeguard instructions to a couple of teens. When I quizzed them about what they should do when someone is choking, one of them said, "Take a step back" and winked at me. FML

#21282836
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32181) - you deserved it (3357)

On 10/21/2014 at 11:18pm - work - by Australian Lifeguard - United States (Arizona)

Today, the man who hit on me in a store and asked for my number showed up on my doorstep to inquire about my couch for sale. With his wife. FML

#21262712
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31101) - you deserved it (2263)

On 09/21/2014 at 9:27pm - misc - by ohtheirony -

Today, I had a volleyball game, and we were down by 13 points. I looked up at the crowd, and my mom was shaking her head in disappointment. When it was my turn to serve, I aced them, and tied the score. When I looked up she was gone. She'd left. When I got home, I heard how I sucked for an hour. FML

#21260940
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39718) - you deserved it (2400)

On 09/18/2014 at 9:56pm - misc - by Lexi801 - United States (Utah)

Today, I had to take bus to work, because yesterday my car was hit by a bus. While standing there, I noticed the driver kept looking back at me every now and then. As I went to get off, he looks at me again and says: "Sorry..." FML

#21252700
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44438) - you deserved it (2616)

On 09/05/2014 at 10:36pm - work - by crop circle galore - United States



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