darksunshinegirl

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Offline (the 12/21/2015 at 3:14am)

darksunshinegirl

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 11 July 1995 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 204
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About darksunshinegirl : @daarksunshinee on Twitter
daarksunshinee.tumblr.com on Tumblr
@daarksunshinee on Instagram

look me up, follow me, figure me out.

darksunshinegirl's page activity

Visits<b>I_Like_Boobs</b> - the 06/20/2016 at 2:56pm<b>LPac5295</b> - the 03/17/2016 at 8:49am<b>onlytimewilltell</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 11:46pm<b>Cacksonic</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 1:23am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 03/05/2016 at 7:52am<b>NH_Freelancer</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 11:29am<b>JMCJester69</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 9:17am<b>nhatt</b> - the 10/21/2015 at 11:41pm<b>balboa_2</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 2:28am<b>krisseyDJ</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 8:21pm

Fucked!<b>JMCJester69</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 3:17pm<b>krisseyDJ</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 2:21am

darksunshinegirl's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

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darksunshinegirl's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up to shuffling noises coming from downstairs. Suspecting the worst, I jumped out of bed, and whispered over my shoulder for my girlfriend to stay quiet. Only after going downstairs and taking a swing in the dark with my bat did I figure out it was just my girlfriend foraging for snacks. FML

by Zack / 04/01/2012 at 5:36pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I offered an elderly man my seat on the train. He thanked me by winking and offering me a seat on his lap. FML

by Anonymous / 04/01/2012 at 9:53am / Australia (Western Australia) / Transportation

Today, I felt manly. I spent almost the entire day peeling paint, power sanding, and applying Spackle for my grandma. Strutting with masculinity, I headed for the shower, only to let out a womanly yelp at a spider hanging at eye level around a corner. Manliness gone. FML

by Anonymous / 03/29/2012 at 9:54pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized that something's wrong when you have to go to a mental hospital for a family reunion. FML

by neverthesame / 03/28/2012 at 10:53pm / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She said it's a good thing, because it was a "mutual decision", and that while she wouldn't mind staying together, I was the one who wanted to split, and she respected my decision. I wish I had been a part of this delusional conversation. FML

Today, my girlfriend compared my penis to a snake. Not because of the size or shape, but because a snake is not something she imagines herself ever touching. FML

by Anonymous / 03/15/2012 at 7:50am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk. Almost before he could open his mouth, my mother popped her head into the room and said, "Be realistic, Dan. Who would want to sleep with that?" FML

by CallaC / 03/14/2012 at 10:01pm / Canada (New Brunswick) / Miscellaneous

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents. Her huge, ex-Marine father took me out back, saying he wanted to show me something. That something was a machete. He savagely buried it in a tree stump and said, "Son, if you break my daughter's heart, that'll be your dick." FML

by PUA / 03/14/2012 at 9:06pm / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy

Today, I was masturbating, and out of the corner of my eye I saw a figure. It was my neighbor staring at me through the window with a total look of disgust. I moved in this weekend and hadn't yet introduced myself to her. FML

by Anonymous / 03/14/2012 at 3:31pm / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I was chatting to a nice girl at the mall, and I said if she didn't get a raise, I would write to the management. She said they have no email address, and I replied that I meant an actual letter. "Like, on paper?" she said, "Damn, how old are ya, pops?" I want a ticket off this planet. FML

by S. Michaels / 03/14/2012 at 11:17am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom was freaking out about me handling a CD-ROM with my bare hands. When I asked her what all the commotion was about, she said she was worried that I would catch "one of those computer viruses" she'd heard about on the news. FML

Today, my son learned that when you slide a mug across the kitchen table, it doesn't stop where you expect it to like in the old cartoons. I then learned what it feels like to have a full mug of hot chocolate spilled onto my crotch. FML

by Bruce / 02/01/2012 at 10:11pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Kids

Today, I had a quicky with my boyfriend, because his dad was about to pick him up. Afterwards, I texted: "Nice to meet your dad, hope we didn't look too heated." A few minutes later, he replied: "Great timing, he was holding my phone." FML

by B / 01/31/2012 at 3:36pm / Netherlands / Intimacy

Today, I cut my finger with a plastic knife while demonstrating that you can't cut yourself with a plastic knife. FML

by cbad / 01/30/2012 at 10:27am / United States / Health

Today, I learnt there's a woman who comes into my store only to hear my Barry White-like voice. My boss knows who it is, yet refuses to tell me because it's "hilarious." I'm now cautious of every customer. FML

by Anonymous / 01/30/2012 at 4:00am / Australia (New South Wales) / Work