About darkenedkitten : i love video games.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Beginner
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
Today, two guys broke into my apartment to rob me at gunpoint. While I was wanking. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51567) - you deserved it (9778)
On 12/01/2010 at 12:11am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Louisiana)
Today, my girlfriend got a great idea for her history class project... while we were having sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20360) - you deserved it (4995)
On 11/30/2010 at 8:52pm - intimacy - by erpuchi (man) - Dominican Republic (Distrito Nacional)
Today, I found out my girlfriend had sex with three different guys in one day. All at a party. A party that I was at. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39391) - you deserved it (5721)
On 11/30/2010 at 12:46pm - intimacy - by crushed (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when I came. She got pissed and slapped me really hard for cumming inside her because she didnt want to get pregnant. 1. I was wearing a condom. 2. Shes on the pill. 3. We were having anal sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (53875) - you deserved it (7019)
On 10/31/2010 at 9:30am - intimacy - by Tai - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my girlfriend was going down on me. She only did it for 30 seconds, stopped, then said, "I'm not in the mood anymore." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24815) - you deserved it (6072)
On 10/29/2010 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Taylor parsons - United States (Alabama)
Today, my little cousin is going to be staying at our house for a year or so, because of financial problems. It wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for the fact that every single night he creeps up on me while I'm sleeping, and shouts "GO F YOURSELF!" directly into my ear. Only another 11 months to go. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21254) - you deserved it (2291)
On 10/28/2010 at 12:44am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I had a date with a guy I've had a crush on for 6 years. Things got heated when we got back to his place, but he had trouble getting the condom on. As soon he got it on, he came. I told him it was ok, I'd help him get hard again. He said, "No thanks. I'm good." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28089) - you deserved it (2973)
On 10/26/2010 at 12:37pm - intimacy - by Deidle-dee - United States
Today, my boyfriend decided to come over and surprise me. When he got to my apartment and heard the shower running, he decided get in and join me. I was walking my dog, my mother is in town for the weekend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33890) - you deserved it (2943)
On 10/25/2010 at 6:09pm - animals - by sly - United States (Texas)
Today, I teach English in Taiwan. I got two new students, brothers named Harry and Potter. People, they're children, not pets. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24290) - you deserved it (4042)
On 10/21/2010 at 9:03pm - misc - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version
Today, my boyfriend of three years proposed to me. He brought me to our favorite restaurant and ordered expensive champagne. It was all very romantic, until he got on one knee and I farted out of surprise. Loudly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31686) - you deserved it (5917)
On 08/31/2010 at 10:48am - love - by maebyf - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I walked in on my mom giving my dad head. Acting like I hadn't seen anything, I asked if I could use a towel sitting on the dresser. My mom said, "No, we're going to need that one." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24936) - you deserved it (5131)
On 08/29/2010 at 11:37am - intimacy - by bkay26 - United States (Georgia)
Today, my dad walked in on me singing "Bohemian Rhapsody", while spinning in circles with the cat in my arms. I thought I was home alone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9322) - you deserved it (18196)
On 08/29/2010 at 12:54am - animals - by Hobbsie - Canada (Ontario)
Today, it was really hot in my house so I pulled my shorts down so I was just in my boxers. My family and I were watching tv and I got a spontaneous erection. When I discreetly tried to pull my shorts back up, my penis flipped out of my boxers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28736) - you deserved it (19870)
On 08/28/2010 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Sicko - Sent from mobile version
Today, my new girlfriend, with whom I have not had sex, showed me her collection of sex toys. She picked up one approximately the size of my forearm and said "This one is my favorite" now I'm scared for her to see me naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34275) - you deserved it (3324)
On 08/27/2010 at 5:15am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex in a rarely used room at school. We got carried away and found ourselves locked in. We slept there overnight. We woke up when the cleaning lady found us the next morning and were greeted by worried parents and school staff. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9495) - you deserved it (33540)
On 08/26/2010 at 5:17pm - intimacy - by Eeeek (woman) - Bulgaria (Varna)
Monday 17 June 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
