About darkenedkitten : i love video games.
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This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
darkenedkitten's favorite FMLs
Today, it's been two months since I got a kitten. He loves to hide, and then surprise me by jumping out of his hiding place. It was quite a surprise when he launched himself out of my bag during class. FML
by LucidNightmare / 01/27/2013 at 12:38am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 01/06/2012 at 9:22pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health
Today, I had a dream that I was trying to pop a balloon. Nothing I did was working, so I put it between my knees and tried to pop it that way. Immediately, I woke up to the sound of frantic hissing and meowing. As it turns out, I was trying to pop the cat. FML
by furryballoon / 11/21/2011 at 11:46pm / United States (Washington) / Animals
by ohmaigawd / 09/14/2011 at 12:59pm / Argentina / Intimacy
Today, I decided to formally introduce my girlfriend to my parents. My dad took the opportunity to apologize for walking in on us a few days ago while we were having sex. It wasn't her. Thanks dad. FML
by Anonymous / 09/10/2011 at 2:35am / United States / Intimacy
by INside / 08/02/2011 at 12:52am / United States (New York) / Intimacy
by Lame / 07/09/2011 at 8:19pm / United States (New York) / Money
by bob / 02/05/2011 at 7:02am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
by em / 02/05/2011 at 4:32am / United Kingdom (North East Lincolnshire) / Love
Today, I had a date with a girl I'd been seeing for about a month. When I got home, I saw her facebook status changed to "In a relationship". This made me kind of excited, until I realized it wasn't with me. FML
by sadman / 02/05/2011 at 2:16am / United States (Virginia) / Love
by SkinsCastSelection / 01/17/2011 at 4:53am / France / Love
by SkinsCastSelection / 01/17/2011 at 4:53am / France / Intimacy
Today, my girlfriend and I were about to have sex for the first time. We are both virgins. After we kissed and I took down my pants, she screamed and said "That THING is going to break me." We never did it. FML
by Anonymous / 01/16/2011 at 8:28pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I moved three hours away from my boyfriend for college. Even though he got accepted to the…