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darkenedkitten

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darkenedkitten

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 10 October 1988 (25 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 777
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About darkenedkitten : i love video games.

darkenedkitten's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:54pm<b>nicholaslim</b> - the 12/29/2010 at 3:54am<b>luv4xlr8ion</b> - the 10/04/2010 at 11:31am<b>zdani</b> - the 08/22/2010 at 9:39pm<b>buzz18</b> - the 07/26/2010 at 2:20pm<b>fuck_this_shit_5</b> - the 07/23/2010 at 11:59am<b>selenagirl</b> - the 07/21/2010 at 7:33am<b>broken_symlink</b> - the 07/18/2010 at 9:28pm<b>Saudade</b> - the 07/18/2010 at 8:37am<b>5t3ff1k4h</b> - the 06/24/2010 at 12:40am<b>Snugglez</b> - the 06/22/2010 at 8:23pm<b>nerdsgetmehot</b> - the 06/22/2010 at 3:36pm<b>rallets</b> - the 06/20/2010 at 10:30pm<b>Chaith</b> - the 06/18/2010 at 12:24pm<b>Aero_boy</b> - the 06/16/2010 at 11:37pm

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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darkenedkitten's favorite FMLs

Today, it's been two months since I got a kitten. He loves to hide, and then surprise me by jumping out of his hiding place. It was quite a surprise when he launched himself out of my bag during class. FML

#20483320
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45393) - you deserved it (5931) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/28/2013 at 2:52pm - animals - by Kitten_Love - Sent from mobile version

Today, I got a text from an unknown number saying, "You shouldn't be eating that." I was eating a piece of chocolate, cheating on my diet. FML

#20480667
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30194) - you deserved it (17018)

On 01/27/2013 at 12:38am - misc - by LucidNightmare - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was cooking with super hot ghost peppers. The package said "After handling them not to touch your eyes, nose or pets". They should've added "penis" to that list. FML

#18729935
357 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11829) - you deserved it (54897)

On 01/06/2012 at 9:22pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had a dream that I was trying to pop a balloon. Nothing I did was working, so I put it between my knees and tried to pop it that way. Immediately, I woke up to the sound of frantic hissing and meowing. As it turns out, I was trying to pop the cat. FML

#18312960
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34252) - you deserved it (6019)

On 11/21/2011 at 11:46pm - animals - by furryballoon (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend proposed by painting his chest with "marry me?" and an arrow going down. The ring was attached to his penis with a string. FML

#17743940
293 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41398) - you deserved it (6207)

On 09/14/2011 at 12:59pm - intimacy - by ohmaigawd (woman) - Argentina

Today, I decided to formally introduce my girlfriend to my parents. My dad took the opportunity to apologize for walking in on us a few days ago while we were having sex. It wasn't her. Thanks dad. FML

#17709124
580 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20783) - you deserved it (233823)

On 09/10/2011 at 2:35am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend decided it'd be funny to create a "place" on Facebook for my vagina. Now he "checks-in" every time we have sex. FML

#17338945
332 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50648) - you deserved it (9770)

On 08/02/2011 at 12:52am - intimacy - by INside (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was robbed by a guy wearing a ninja turtle costume. FML

#17044811
287 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40140) - you deserved it (6210)

On 07/09/2011 at 8:19pm - money - by Lame (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I saw my mom run across the house naked for a condom. FML

#14849779
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50856) - you deserved it (3747)

On 02/05/2011 at 7:02am - misc - by bob - United States (Arizona)

Today, my boyfriend came home drunk. As he got home he asked me to marry him, I was going to say yes until he said, "Oh wait, wrong woman." FML

#14849196
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42111) - you deserved it (5203)

On 02/05/2011 at 4:32am - love - by em - United Kingdom (North East Lincolnshire)

Today, I had a date with a girl I'd been seeing for about a month. When I got home, I saw her facebook status changed to "In a relationship". This made me kind of excited, until I realized it wasn't with me. FML

#14848305
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30503) - you deserved it (3325)

On 02/05/2011 at 2:16am - love - by sadman (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, trying to be an old-school romantic, I asked my girlfriend "where art thou my love?" via SMS. She replied "Toilet." FML

#14659588
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14496) - you deserved it (26551)

On 01/21/2011 at 6:41am - love - by gummy bear -

Today, in the middle of the night, my girlfriend whispered "Are you asleep?" I chose not to respond, to see what she'd do. She then let rip a loud, stinking fart, giggled, and went back to sleep. FML

#14610611
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14013) - you deserved it (36198) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my climax, she thought it would be funny to turn my 'weapon' against me. Boom, headshot. FML

#14610613
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40036) - you deserved it (26533) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, my girlfriend and I were about to have sex for the first time. We are both virgins. After we kissed and I took down my pants, she screamed and said "That THING is going to break me." We never did it. FML

#14604817
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43292) - you deserved it (6262)

On 01/16/2011 at 8:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)



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