Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

darkdemon24

Search for a member

darkdemon24

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 5 November 1986 (27 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 346
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About darkdemon24 : Not really much about me. Just an average person with the same opinion as everyone depending on the situation.

darkdemon24's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of darkdemon24's badges

darkdemon24's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally bought a car, after saving up for a year. My dealer had told me it was a good buy, so I snapped it up then and there. On the way home, the rear axle practically fell out of the car due to frame rot. My dealer wants to buy the car back at half the price. FML

#19587863
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10274) - you deserved it (25585)

On 05/07/2012 at 4:40pm - money - by exalia (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, the father of my child couldn't understand why he had been laid off from his job as a painter's assistant. He couldn't find a broom or vacuum, so he "cleaned" a carpet by laying down strips of painter's tape and pulling it up. FML

#19586827
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19338) - you deserved it (3224)

On 05/07/2012 at 11:57am - work - by notrocketscience (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I accidentally kicked a can and it hit a man's shoe. He tried to kick it at me but his foot somehow failed to connect with the can. I could hear it rattling behind me as he failed again and again. So he decided to run up behind me and throw it at my head. FML

#19586621
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21829) - you deserved it (5253)

On 05/07/2012 at 10:08am - misc - by thepigeonsfriend (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I asked my dad why there were no photos of me on the wall. He replied, "Every time you disappoint us we burn one." FML

#19586113
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29205) - you deserved it (4675)

On 05/07/2012 at 5:51am - misc - by N (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, while showering with my boyfriend, he asked if something was weird about his penis. Naturally, I looked closer. As soon as I did, he sprayed my face with urine. This is only the beginning; we just moved in. FML

#19586096
362 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46181) - you deserved it (8851)

On 05/07/2012 at 5:42am - intimacy - by quirrus (woman) - United States

Today, I went to a river near my house. They have several swing ropes that you grab and then jump into the river. As I was about to let go of the rope, my leg got tangled and I was held underwater. My mom watched and laughed for a while before she came to help me. FML

#19585555
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19566) - you deserved it (2549)

On 05/07/2012 at 1:25am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my dad found a couple of coins on the floor next to my desk, and gave me a lecture about how money doesn't grow on trees and how irresponsible I am when it comes to money. They were Chuck E. Cheese tokens. FML

#19585247
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20394) - you deserved it (2273)

On 05/07/2012 at 12:12am - money - by rofindie (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She promptly had a panic attack and screamed, "No!" FML

#19584517
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26469) - you deserved it (2397)

On 05/06/2012 at 10:13pm - love - by gutted (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I had to convince my 28-year-old boyfriend to take down his booger wall. FML

#19584469
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19236) - you deserved it (4696)

On 05/06/2012 at 10:03pm - misc - by fock (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got my colonoscopy results back. I had hoped they'd show what's been causing my stomach pains for the last few weeks, but instead it turns out that my colon is healthy and normal. I basically got cornholed for no goddamn reason. FML

#19583210
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18391) - you deserved it (3724)

On 05/06/2012 at 5:57pm - health - by billiams15 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I married the man of my dreams. While I was being driven to our wedding reception, I checked my Facebook. My husband had just updated his status to "Me and the bitch just got hitched." FML

#19582200
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28602) - you deserved it (6423)

On 05/06/2012 at 2:01pm - love - by Bridget (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my son tried to swat a fly with a hammer. Our apartment walls are now littered with dents and holes. FML

#19581531
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20322) - you deserved it (4048)

On 05/06/2012 at 10:57am - misc - by flustered (man) - United States (South Dakota)

Today, I noticed my nephew has blue eyes, freckles and dimples which don't run in my family or my sister's husband's family, but they do run in my husband's family. FML

#19581290
326 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37125) - you deserved it (3701)

On 05/06/2012 at 9:53am - misc - by Damn (woman) - Australia

Today, I had a dream I was on the toilet taking the longest piss known to man. Unfortunately, it was partially true. FML

Today, I had a huge yard sale. Since I live in a good neighborhood, I decided to leave the stuff out tonight rather than pack it all in for only a few hours. The news didn't say anything about the impending severe thunderstorm. FML

#19580691
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7085) - you deserved it (29072)

On 05/06/2012 at 3:38am - misc - by penguindude82 - United States (Texas)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: