darkdemon24

Search for a member

Offline (the 02/05/2015 at 7:53pm)

darkdemon24

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 5 November 1986 (29 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 562
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About darkdemon24 : Not really much about me. Just an average person with the same opinion as everyone depending on the situation.

darkdemon24's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of darkdemon24's badges

darkdemon24's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at the gym on the elliptical. Feeling proud of myself for finishing a very intense workout, I looked to my left to see that the maintenance guy fixing the machine next to me had burned more calories testing the machine than I did during my entire workout. FML

by Slowsky / 05/09/2012 at 6:19am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I went to the beach. While I was enjoying the sun, an old man with prosthetic leg and no clothes on sat next to me. He took off his fake leg and put it behind his head. Then he opened his legs revealing his "stuff." I will never unsee this. Ever. FML

by aligator1009 / 05/09/2012 at 12:54am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my wife stabbed my hand with a fork, making it bleed. I'd only tried to take some fries from her plate. FML

by Mouhahaa / 05/08/2012 at 11:48pm / France / Love

Today, I heard the ice cream truck. Being the idiot that I am, I ran down the steps and almost immediately fell down them. I needed four stitches. I didn't even get my ice cream. FML

by Anonymous / 05/08/2012 at 9:59pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I corrected someone who spelled "learned" as "learnt" on my favorite forum. Nothing could've prepared me for the torrent of abuse that followed from the non-American members. Now I'm banned for "trolling," and all my 7,000+ posts since 2006 are gone forever. FML

by Anonymous / 05/08/2012 at 6:10pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, against my wishes, my son snuck out of my house to go partying. When he came home, I called him in so I could properly discipline him. While I was talking, he staggered to our fish tank, pulled open the lid, and vomited straight into it. FML

by A-64 / 05/08/2012 at 4:48pm / Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest) / Kids

Today, I was shopping at Walmart, when I saw a really good deal on some bacon. Before I could take any, a huge-ass woman stormed over, kicked my cart down the aisle, and snatched every single packet for herself. And I actually got upset over this. FML

by wtf is wrong with my country / 05/08/2012 at 1:57pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my pet mouse demonstrated that he has bigger balls than my boyfriend, by running across the dinner table and eating off his plate, all while he jumped out of his chair, screaming like a girl. FML

by gl0b3suck0r / 05/08/2012 at 12:41pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Animals

Today, I was at my job life-guarding, when a woman pushed the spine-board over, hitting me on the back of my head. She laughed, but I now have a concussion and a stiff neck, and my co-workers can't stop laughing at the "irony." FML

by Anonymous / 05/08/2012 at 10:00am / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I was broken up with via a cereal analogy. Apparently, I'm a Cheerio and all he wants is a Fruit Loop. FML

by Kyley / 05/08/2012 at 7:55am / United States / Love

Today, I walked in on my daughter attempting to iron her pants with a hair straightener. She's 17. FML

by SomePeoplesKids / 05/08/2012 at 2:08am / Canada (Alberta) / Kids

Today, I was practicing for a choir concert that I have next week. My mom walked into my room and listened to me for a little while. After I finished the last song, she smiled, patted me on the head and said, "It's okay honey, I can't sing either." FML

by Ellie / 05/08/2012 at 1:05am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a parking ticket while I was in the car. I didn't even notice it happen. Ninja cops do exist. FML

by Anonymous / 05/07/2012 at 10:52pm / United States / Money

Today, the Star Wars Cantina song had been stuck in my head since I woke up, as my brother was humming it. I finally managed to get it out of my head. Then my mom started to whistle it. It's stuck in my head again. FML

by Anonymous / 05/07/2012 at 7:52pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my four-year-old daughter started screaming and lashing out at me as I was getting her ready for a bath. It seems my idiot husband told her she was still small enough to be feasted on by the "drain monster". FML

by lon01t / 05/07/2012 at 4:43pm / United Kingdom (Falkirk) / Kids