daphnizzle

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daphnizzle

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 3 March 1989 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4463
  • Number of comments : 21
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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daphnizzle's page activity

Visits<b>ptellini</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 10:55am<b>Juicenub</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 4:21am<b>dafuck_15</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 10:00pm<b>Laxinitup</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 7:30am<b>Ayezed</b> - the 03/25/2014 at 1:17pm<b>mariepastyglue</b> - the 08/19/2013 at 3:01am<b>bananagoat</b> - the 08/06/2013 at 11:35pm<b>l4nier15</b> - the 06/18/2013 at 9:31pm<b>mik3r</b> - the 03/17/2013 at 11:37pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:09pm<b>ally_anonymous</b> - the 01/09/2011 at 11:28pm<b>Aaron89D</b> - the 01/09/2011 at 6:21pm<b>riad91</b> - the 11/19/2010 at 4:26pm<b>georggx</b> - the 11/14/2010 at 6:19pm<b>rob935</b> - the 10/17/2010 at 10:46am<b>thunderdome41</b> - the 09/16/2010 at 12:10am<b>GirlWithAHat</b> - the 09/15/2010 at 8:21pm<b>tika12991</b> - the 09/15/2010 at 3:28am

daphnizzle's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

daphnizzle's favorite FMLs

Today, at a family dinner, my new husband compared deciding to marry me to buying a used car. Some of the similarites included looking under the hood and finding out how many previous owners there were. FML

by carwife / 08/21/2010 at 12:13am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I was on a small plane. A flight attendant told us that there was too much weight in the front of the plane and they needed 3 people to move to the back of the plane. I volunteer and walk to the back. She says, "Okay, we're going to need 1 more person." FML

by Anonymous / 04/13/2009 at 12:39am / United States (North Carolina) / Health

Today, my Dad called me to tell me that he had finally won the lottery and that I no longer had to worry about trying to find a way to pay for school. I was so excited I started crying. He then told me that he won $5 on a scratch off lotto ticket. He bought a sandwich. Funny dad. FML

by Anonymous / 04/11/2009 at 12:13pm / United States (Illinois) / Money

Today, while at the Golden Gate Bridge, I spotted a large group of Asians trying to take a picture. Trying to help, I slowly say, "You... want me... take picture?" while using hand motions. The man looks at me and says, "No thanks asshole, I got it," in plain English. FML

by Tourist / 03/26/2009 at 3:19am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a job interview. I stopped to take a pee in the lobby before I went in. I relaxed a bit too much at the urinal and accidentally farted. I chuckled about it like a 5-year old for a few seconds. The guy that had been next to me at the urinal was the interviewer. FML

by ADH2000 / 03/09/2009 at 6:45pm / United States (New York) / Work

Today, me and my girlfriend were watching some show about sex on the discovery channel. The topic of female orgasms came up and she said, "Wow, I wonder what that's like?" We've been dating and sexually active for three years. FML

by secret123 / 02/24/2009 at 6:01am / United States / Intimacy