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danthehuman

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danthehuman

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 21 July 1999 (15 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 946
  • Number of comments : 40
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About danthehuman : Hi. I've been on FML a couple of years. Just here to have fun :). I also play RTS games on Gameranger. If anyone plays AOE III or things like that, don't hesitate to message me.

danthehuman's page activity

Visits<b>greentide</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 8:08pm<b>Emzinatorbot</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 10:55pm<b>wilburhp</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 11:32pm<b>crazycountry81</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 8:01pm<b>yuggi1</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 11:59am<b>berryjones11024</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 9:02am<b>MzZombicidal</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 8:09am<b>thatoneguy2a</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 1:17am<b>makeda_3</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 10:36pm<b>derpina72</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 2:58pm<b>edvin</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 8:09pm<b>Ev3d11</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 12:22am<b>emmaaadotcom</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 3:30am<b>cameronaka</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 11:59pm<b>akkianjum</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 10:13pm<b>abattior</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 7:41pm<b>WoldowJR</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 7:28pm<b>99treee</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 11:27pm

Liked!<b>msid9999</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 7:59am

danthehuman's FML badges

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You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

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You have thumbed 5000 comments.

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You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

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danthehuman's favorite FMLs

Today, I posted a photo on Facebook showing a side-by-side view of me before and after I'd tried out my new makeup. My dad commented, "What is this, Gollum cosplaying an Orc?" My mum, brother, and over 20 "friends" liked his comment. FML

#21320382
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19651) - you deserved it (3366)

On 12/19/2014 at 2:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I was shocked to notice that my hair has started growing out entirely silver, supposedly due to pregnancy. I'm 19. Apparently, according to my aunt, "It runs in the family." FML

#21320202
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23780) - you deserved it (4764)

On 12/19/2014 at 5:41am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, the power went out at school. As a senior, I don't show up until third period. When I got there, I signed in as usual. The office secretary waited until I signed in to tell me that if I hadn't, I wouldn't have to attend classes that day. Now I have to sit in class doing nothing. FML

#21315594
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25210) - you deserved it (2893)

On 12/11/2014 at 1:20pm - misc - by KCHS - United States

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend of 2 years after eating in a 5-star restaurant. She said that she wasn't ready and that she would walk home by herself, which she did. A homeless gentleman walked up from behind me, patted me on the back and said, "Bitches man." I cried. FML

#21315476
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36793) - you deserved it (2639)

On 12/11/2014 at 7:01am - love - by Brasilian29 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was a bit upset to learn that my 13 year-old daughter had a boyfriend. When she noticed, she assured me that I shouldn't worry, because "it's just for sex anyway". FML

#21311570
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35035) - you deserved it (5351)

On 12/04/2014 at 6:46pm - kids - by aprouddaddy - Sent from mobile version

Today, my mom found my dildo, and got so angry that she beat me with it. FML

#21309415
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42384) - you deserved it (10754)

On 12/01/2014 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I realized my anger management has hit a new low when I screamed at a goose for being a goose. FML

#21309384
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27614) - you deserved it (7476)

On 12/01/2014 at 11:38am - misc - by WickedLittleDoll - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I sat down for a poop. The toilet seat slid off immediately, taking me with it. I lay on the bathroom floor for several moments stunned, still pooping. FML

#21308801
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32668) - you deserved it (4221)

On 11/30/2014 at 2:32pm - misc - by pooplife - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, my little sister asked if she could play on my laptop, but I said no because I was writing an essay for school. She then bit herself hard and showed the mark to our parents, saying I did it. As they bitched me out, my sister got on my laptop and deleted my half-finished essay. FML

#21308491
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40267) - you deserved it (2556)

On 11/30/2014 at 12:48am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, while walking home with my mom, some unoriginal cockshart in a passing car yelled at me: "Fuck her in the pussy!" It was a long, awkward walk home after that. FML

#21308349
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28772) - you deserved it (2483)

On 11/29/2014 at 8:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I asked my girlfriend's father for permission to take his daughter's hand in marriage. He asked me "Which one?" I said "Uh, the one I'm dating... Lisa." He belched and said, "Yeah sure, throw 'er off a cliff for all I care. Piss off, boy." So much for chivalry. FML

#21308242
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33048) - you deserved it (2986)

On 11/29/2014 at 4:54pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after a huge fight, my girlfriend started coming onto me. I thought it was actual make-up sex and went along with it. It was great, until she suddenly shoved me off her just as I was almost ready to come. She smugly announced she was dumping me, got dressed, then left. FML

#21308219
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34823) - you deserved it (5751)

On 11/29/2014 at 4:08pm - intimacy - by blueballed (man) - Germany (Schleswig-Holstein)

Today, my little brother learned about mortality when our dog died. Since then, he's gone a little nuts and keeps ranting that he sees no point as to why our other dog should live. He's 16. FML

#21306062
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28654) - you deserved it (2280)

On 11/26/2014 at 7:09am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal)

Today, I learned that if life gives you lemons, your sister is going to squeeze them over your face while you take a nap on the couch. FML

#21303546
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27219) - you deserved it (1953)

On 11/21/2014 at 9:00pm - misc - by ShutUp007 - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my boss said he's worried about our network, because "Wifi's all in the air. People could spy on us from anywhere!" I sarcastically said "My god, you're right!" and suggested switching to tin-foil ethernet cables to stop the signal escaping. He told me to do it ASAP. This moron makes five times my salary. FML

#21302784
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32330) - you deserved it (3542)

On 11/20/2014 at 3:15pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)



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