dang

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dang

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 65093
  • Number of comments : 116
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 23 posted

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dang's page activity

Visits<b>ToriDawnxx</b> - the 04/26/2016 at 9:46pm<b>RawrPancaked</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 7:31am<b>Gladeryn</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 9:21pm<b>buffaloshmuffalo</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 6:59pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 8:51am<b>erinshuttleworth</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 1:51pm<b>ElloSubjects</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 9:24pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 12:07am<b>Earrings100</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 10:57am<b>frostedpuffs</b> - the 04/10/2014 at 5:53pm<b>faglio</b> - the 10/07/2013 at 4:53pm<b>goawayy</b> - the 07/31/2013 at 6:13pm<b>XxnirvanaxX</b> - the 04/03/2013 at 4:05am<b>scothran428</b> - the 12/21/2012 at 6:59pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:31pm<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 1:21am<b>jeanii</b> - the 11/14/2009 at 4:34pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 09/29/2009 at 11:35pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 2:51pm

dang's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

dang's favorite FMLs

Today, I tried for the first time putting a condom on my boyfriend using my mouth. I freaked out, swallowed, and started choking on the condom. FML

by notsexy / 05/09/2009 at 11:51am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. I really get off on hearing her say my name so I was imagining her doing so more often than she actually was. I then called out my own name by accident. FML

by eeh / 05/07/2009 at 10:45am / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I was pulled over for speeding. When the police officer approached me and asked for license and registration, I accidentally gave him my fake I.D. FML

by FakeID / 05/06/2009 at 4:05pm / United States (Georgia) / Transportation

Today, I found a box of birthday candles sitting on the coffee table. Bored, I lit one, and after a minute I threw it away and sat back down on the couch. I started looking at the box and noticed that it said "Magic Re-Lighting Candles" at the exact moment that my trash can burst into flames. FML

by Anonymous / 05/04/2009 at 4:28pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was driving down the road at about 10pm, when the passenger in the car in front of me threw something out the window. The object flew towards and landed directly on my windshield. It was a condom. A used condom. It wasn't tied. Semen spreads out quite a bit when you're driving fast. FML

by Aether / 05/03/2009 at 5:17pm / United States (Michigan) / Transportation

Today, at 4 AM, I locked myself out of my apartment. After calling friends in vain, I decided to just sit on the doorstep and wait for someone to come in. I sat for 10 minutes before a homeless man insisted threateningly that I move. I was kicked off my own front doorstep by a homeless man. FML

Today, I went to the mall with a couple of friends. While walking through the parking lot, we saw a very dirty car. You couldn't even see the inside of the car through the windows. I thought it would be funny to trace on the window, "Wash Me." After doing so, the driver got out of the car. FML

by Anonymous / 04/24/2009 at 12:38am / United States (Colorado) / Transportation

Today, I saw a girl I knew from high school at the DMV and she started leaning forward. I thought she was leaning into hug me. So I just began to hug her. She was actually trying to throw something in the garbage. FML

by Anonymous / 04/23/2009 at 6:07am / United States (New York) / Love

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Right as I was really getting into it, he pauses, frowns, and says, "I think I see the pee hole." FML

by Anonymous / 04/17/2009 at 1:43am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was home alone while my mom went out to dinner. I decided to hop in the shower, and I noticed my mom left her douche in there. After, I texted her telling her what I found and that it was gross. Her response? "It's not gross. It came from my vagina, like you and your sister." FML

by duuuuude / 04/16/2009 at 11:08pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Health

Today, I was driving home from school, when I saw this girl I like walking home. Trying to be polite, I pulled over and asked if she wanted a ride. After my offer, I was rejected as she said "No, I'm actually already home," and walked up the nearest driveway... MY driveway. FML

by Kelavmeister / 04/16/2009 at 9:16pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, my mom and I went to Winn-Dixie. I told her I was going to a different isle 5 minutes later I hear my name on the intercom to go to the front of the store. As I go I see my mom crying, she comes and hugs me and tells me she thought I was lost. Im 22, I had my cell phone, and I drove there. FML

by SwimSquid / 04/15/2009 at 2:38pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was talking to a guy I met online and have known for 4 years. I've fallen in love with him twice, one of those times being currently. He was supposed to visit this summer. I got an email from him saying he's really a 17 year old girl from Chesterfield, MO. FML

by oxbbabexo / 04/14/2009 at 9:45am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, half asleep, I dropped my pill before I could take it. I quickly picked it up and washed it down. Five hours later, I just found my pill on the ground. What did I swallow? FML

by anonymiss / 04/13/2009 at 12:12pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, I was surfing and trying to impress some girls on the beach. While I was out in the water, a jellyfish wrapped itself around my torso. I started to yell and freak out, making a huge scene. I grabbed it off of me, only to realize that I was freaking out over a plastic grocery bag. FML

by effingawwesome / 04/11/2009 at 2:52pm / United States (South Carolina) / Miscellaneous