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Today, I was walking in the mountains when I tripped, I grabbed onto the fence in an attempt to soften my fall. The fence was electric. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37270) - you totally deserved it (2272)
On 08/01/2009 at 12:49pm - misc - by Electronotfriend (woman) - Poland (Pomorskie)
Today, I was at the mall and someone peeked their head under the door of my dressing room while I was half dressed. Not knowing who it was, I kicked him in the face just out of instinct. Its was a 4 year old kid looking for his mother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36385) - you totally deserved it (12259)
On 07/29/2009 at 4:26pm - misc - by 4yrldkicker (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I tried to break up with my boyfriend. He said no. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36189) - you totally deserved it (15861)
On 07/23/2009 at 10:26pm - love - by Ella (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I had a fight with my little sister. Later she apologized and made me dinner to make up for it. I thought it was pretty good until I found out that instead of using Parmesan cheese in the recipe, she used foot shavings from her Ped Egg. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42505) - you totally deserved it (3673)
On 07/22/2009 at 12:12am - misc - by vomitingnow (man) - United States
Today, I was on a 3 hour plane ride. An elderly man was sitting next to me and before the flight took off, he fell asleep on my shoulder. I decided to be kind and let him sleep. When the flight was about to land, I tried to wake him up. He wouldn't. He died on my shoulder. FML
I agree, your life sucks (67524) - you totally deserved it (2393)
On 07/19/2009 at 12:17am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I had to go through the embarrassment and pain of telling my parents I was pregnant. I took the test and it came out positive and I was freaking out. I got grounded for the rest of the year and they're really disappointed in me. Five minutes ago, I got my period. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37140) - you totally deserved it (15568)
On 07/11/2009 at 9:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I lost my cell phone. Since I sleep on the couch, I started looking through the cushions. I didn't find my phone, but after 6 months of uncomfortably sleeping on the couch, I find out I'm sleeping on top of a pull out bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10733) - you totally deserved it (36761)
On 07/07/2009 at 10:34am - misc - by stupid (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, my daughter asked me what the youngest age you should start having sex is, being a good mother I said that she shouldn't have sex until after she's been married. My daughter then said, "Oh...shoot." and walked away. My daughter is twelve. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48906) - you totally deserved it (6528)
On 06/29/2009 at 8:40pm - intimacy - by blazer - United States (Minnesota)
Today, the cops showed up to check out a child abuse complaint, I then had to spend an hour explaining that I had given my son a suppository. The neighbors heard him sobbing hysterically "Daddy, why did you put that in my butt? It hurts." My neighbor had heard and thought I was raping my son. FML
I agree, your life sucks (53945) - you totally deserved it (2299)
On 06/24/2009 at 5:11pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, I rode my bike to work. While biking on the road, I gave a hand signal for turning left. A car passing the opposite way veered towards me and attempted to give me a high five. I now have cuts all over my body and my bike is in two pieces. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44959) - you totally deserved it (1933)
On 06/15/2009 at 10:13pm - misc - by Shaun (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I tried to imitate Mary Poppins by jumping off a shed with an umbrella. I spent the next 3 hours in the emergency room. My leg is broken. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5129) - you totally deserved it (101355)
On 05/29/2009 at 11:04pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was working at a day care center. A 5 year old boy came up to me telling me he wanted to eat my face. Confused, I asked him why. He said, "Because your face looks like pizza." FML
I agree, your life sucks (35156) - you totally deserved it (2789)
On 05/29/2009 at 5:09pm - health - by PiZzA_FaCe (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I bought a top with some other things. I went to the restroom and had diarrhea, but there was no toilet paper in the stall. I had to use the receipt from the store. I then realized the clerk hadn't put the top in the bag. I needed that receipt to get the top. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33668) - you totally deserved it (8221)
On 05/29/2009 at 1:44am - misc - by suckerrrrr (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, me and my girlfriend were heading back to her place. On the way there, she was rubbing and stroking me. When we got there, I asked her mom for a congrats hug. I forgot I had a hard on from my girlfriend. She felt it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12018) - you totally deserved it (43459)
On 05/27/2009 at 5:45am - intimacy - by arctic1 (man) - United States (Alaska)
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She told me that her father didn't approve of me and forced her out of the relationship. Her father died 2 years ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50237) - you totally deserved it (1887)
On 05/25/2009 at 12:43pm - love - by nadette (man) - United States (California)
