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An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (57633) - you deserved it (4844)
On 05/06/2013 at 2:29am - kids - by SkeetinKeaton (man) - United States
Today, through sheer luck, I got talking to an actor from the Harry Potter films who I've had a crush on since I was about ten. I tried to play it cool, and pretend I didn't know who he was. Then my phone rang, with the Harry Potter theme tune. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19787) - you deserved it (36912)
On 04/30/2013 at 6:23pm - misc - by itsellie27 (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, I went to my daughter's room with clean laundry. I found her lying on her bed with a hand down her pants, totally zoned out and staring blankly at the Justin Bieber poster on her wall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38262) - you deserved it (4760)
On 03/03/2013 at 12:03pm - misc - by parental failure (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, my boyfriend and I were preparing for the arrival of Hurricane Sandy. I tasked him with going out to buy emergency groceries in case we lose power. He returned with dozens of microwave cup noodles. We're going to starve. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18909) - you deserved it (2884)
On 10/28/2012 at 4:14pm - love - by cupnoodles (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I found out my home health patient purposely drinks tons of prune juice every night so I will have a huge mess to clean up in the morning because I'm "a lazy bastard" and I "need to work harder." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17962) - you deserved it (1711)
On 07/03/2012 at 11:08am - work - by melikeyturtles - United States (Illinois)
Today, my future mother in law started shit-talking me on Facebook, and we got into a heated argument. She called me later in the day, saying I'll be lucky if I ever marry her son and that, "You'll suffer to your last breath." I'm now terrified to set foot outside. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18445) - you deserved it (4007)
On 01/14/2012 at 1:26pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)
Today, I walked into my elderly grandmother's trailer, used the bathroom and went to wash my hands. She had a soft spot in the floor that she covered with a bathmat. I fell through. Right leg up to my hip in the floor, boobs stuck on the counter. My husband and grandmother stood there laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18496) - you deserved it (1915)
On 12/27/2011 at 12:13pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I received a rejection letter from a college that I'd applied to 6 years ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23118) - you deserved it (1577)
On 09/13/2011 at 1:53am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my dad informed me that I will be staying in the bug-infested shed for the summer when I come to visit, due to his girlfriend's sewing workspace completely taking over the only room I've ever had at his house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25546) - you deserved it (1626)
On 06/22/2011 at 12:59am - health - by justinj360 - United States (Montana)
Today, my girlfriend told me that her parents have a bet going on when we are going to break up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20969) - you deserved it (2651)
On 12/29/2010 at 10:24am - love - by ... -
Today, my mother took a bunch of sleeping pills, then went driving. I followed her and dialed 911. Now she thinks that I was "trying to get her arrested," and she refuses to talk to me ever again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21701) - you deserved it (3298)
On 12/22/2010 at 5:23pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I finally moved all my boxes into my new apartment. I was settling in when my alarm clock that was stashed in one of the boxes began ringing. Two hours and several boxes later, I still can't find it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17381) - you deserved it (4525)
On 12/18/2010 at 4:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, at work, I was reprimanded for not engaging with customers enough. In an effort to be more friendly, I complimented the next customer on her interesting accent. Turns out it was from a stroke she had last year. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20064) - you deserved it (4897)
On 08/28/2010 at 8:05pm - work - by Flippy - United States (Washington)
Today, I found out that my overprotective parents hired a private investigator a month ago, who since then has been watching my perfectly normal boyfriend, in case he "tries to rape or kill" me. We're both 25 years old. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31047) - you deserved it (1802)
On 08/15/2010 at 8:52am - love - by wtf - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was walking my dog and he stopped to take a crap. While he was doing his business, I saw something white coming out of his butt that just wouldn't budge. He started whimpering and I stepped in to help him. I pulled out an entire plastic bag. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31737) - you deserved it (3600)
On 04/19/2010 at 7:24pm - animals - by buttpicker - United States
Monday 17 June 2013
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