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daking963

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daking963

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  • Number of visits : 6463
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50 favourites

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daking963's favorite FMLs

Today, I lost my phone. I tried to call it using my husband's phone, but couldn't figure out which of the three Kates in the contact list was me. Turns out, two are co-workers and one is his aunt. I was listed under Satan. FML

#9110965
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39769) - you deserved it (8323)

On 03/15/2010 at 7:22pm - love - by Satan (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my dad and I were in the car when a rabbit scurried across the road, just missing us. My dad turned and said to me, "Well, it's good we didn't hit him. He gets to live another day." I then looked in the rear view mirror to see the rabbit running away from the cross traffic, only to be hit by the car behind us. FML

#9102050
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21691) - you deserved it (2987)

On 03/15/2010 at 12:44pm - misc - by bunnylover (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house, when I needed the loo. The door was ajar, so I walked into his bathroom, sat down, and started to pee. I then looked up to see the shocked face of his dad sitting naked in the bath. FML

#9040804
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25915) - you deserved it (8846)

On 03/13/2010 at 4:17am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Havering)

Today, my cat managed to lock my dad and me outside of our house. FML

#5937584
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29278) - you deserved it (6217)

On 10/21/2009 at 10:58pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got pulled over for going 85mph in a 60mph zone on a highway in the Everglades. There were cars passing both the cop and me as I was being pulled over. The cop decided I was easiest to catch since I was the slowest of the bunch even though the other cars were topping 100mph. FML

#5899039
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33343) - you deserved it (15285)

On 10/19/2009 at 5:12pm - misc - by tracey (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my secret crush, who sits next to me in Bio, asked if he could borrow my notes. I agreed. It was only after he drove away, with my notebook, that I realized that in the back of my notes, I had written his name 100 times, surrounded by little hearts. FML

#5869946
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14337) - you deserved it (37044)

On 10/17/2009 at 7:05pm - misc - by Lovenotes (woman) - United States

Today, I realized that acne is a major side effect of a medication I'm taking. The medication is to help me with my anxiety. The acne is creating more anxiety. And the more anxious I get, the more meds I need. And the more my face breaks out. FML

#5861611
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35881) - you deserved it (4593)

On 10/17/2009 at 2:26am - health - by JoJo - United States (Iowa)

Today, I left work at 11pm. It was cold and dark, and I was anxious to get home, so I cut across some soccer fields to get to my car. About halfway across, the sprinklers came on. FML

#5860815
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23892) - you deserved it (7939)

On 10/17/2009 at 1:18am - work - by legotron (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I met some guys from my dad's workplace. They told him what a pretty daughter he had, to which he responded, "Nah, it's just shit-loads of makeup." FML

#5857727
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33067) - you deserved it (6756)

On 10/16/2009 at 10:04pm - misc - by SheWentCrayola (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I bought a safe. I put all of my most prized possessions in it, including all of my jewelry, family heirlooms and important papers. Oh, and just before I locked it up, I put the key to the safe in there too. FML

#5853420
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9339) - you deserved it (44213)

On 10/16/2009 at 5:02pm - misc - by smarty (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was playing FarmTown and got into a fight with a 14 year old boy. I threatened him with physical violence, and he reported me. I'm 23 years old and got banned from a virtual farming game for threatening children. FML

#5841852
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7108) - you deserved it (55639)

On 10/15/2009 at 1:04pm - kids - by hatelittleboys (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I found out that, because i'm a student, the employees I train make more than me. FML

#5840313
20 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27750) - you deserved it (1974)

On 10/15/2009 at 7:29am - money - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was in bed sick from pneumonia. I asked my boyfriend to nuke a can of soup for me. He said "in a sec, let me finish this game" and continued to play on his Xbox for an hour. Starving, I crawled out to make soup. When I sat down to eat, he paused the game and asked "you didn't make me any?" FML

#5826469
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37849) - you deserved it (4875)

On 10/14/2009 at 9:00am - health - by tooflufoschool (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was in a bad mood after being stuck in traffic for 2 hours and late for work. I was walking to my building when I saw a 100 dollar note flying my way. A man called after me for it, but being selfish I took the note in my pocket as a little reward. That man was my boss. Yes, I'm fired. FML

#5757165
331 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7083) - you deserved it (65218)

On 10/10/2009 at 12:30pm - money - by horniness (man) - Hong Kong

Today, my ex said "I love you!" for the first time at a party in front of my boyfriend. Smugly satisfied, I said "Well, you're too late for that." My ex looked at me with irritation and said "I'm talking to him!" and gestured to my boyfriend. They'd been "best friends" since middle school. FML

#5751188
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13917) - you deserved it (31451)

On 10/10/2009 at 12:25am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Alabama)



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