Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

dabears1011234

Search for a member

dabears1011234

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 19 July 2000 (14 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 35
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About dabears1011234 : Hi there.

My name is Caelum and I am 14 years old. I am 5'7" and I am Russian, Ukrainian, Canadian and American. I play Ice hockey and baseball and am an avid camper. I like nutella and anything from Chicago (exept the sox.) I seem to be the only person who thinks people deserve it sometimes

The free palestine movment is a phony.

Add me on PS3 @matyidawg

The Walking Dead

Message me I probably have nothing to do so ;)

Jump Around

dabears1011234's page activity

Visits<b>xx_ginny</b> - 5 hours ago<b>katydid91</b> - 6 hours ago<b>rejlac</b> - 9 hours ago<b>WubStep_</b> - 9 hours ago<b>devildee101</b> - 10 hours ago<b>Feijai</b> - 11 hours ago<b>zingline89</b> - 11 hours ago<b>Garrison21</b> - 12 hours ago<b>_Buttons_</b> - 12 hours ago<b>nick2356</b> - 13 hours ago<b>RenoTheRhino</b> - 16 hours ago<b>Kruitdamp</b> - 18 hours ago<b>Effulgence</b> - 18 hours ago<b>dianababe</b> - 22 hours ago<b>ylime23456</b> - yesterday at 4:39am<b>Miss_Brii</b> - yesterday at 4:08am<b>samm12099</b> - yesterday at 3:19am<b>Ausdank</b> - yesterday at 2:08am

dabears1011234's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of dabears1011234's badges

dabears1011234's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to my weekly AA meeting. It was a huge crowd and I was the guest speaker. Not 5 minutes into my speech, I was booed off stage and banned from further attendance because I accidentally wore a Jack Daniel's shirt. FML

#21217633
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16850) - you deserved it (40415)

On 07/22/2014 at 7:20pm - health - by dypshyyt - United States (Florida)

Today, I found the iPod touch that my mother claimed was stolen at the mall a few years ago, lying on her bed, still logged in to her Facebook. Thanks, mom. FML

#21217252
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37410) - you deserved it (3117)

On 07/22/2014 at 11:54am - misc - by d4rkxf0x - United States (Texas)

Today, I was pulled over for speeding. The officer was nice and let me off with just a warning. That is, until my dipshit brother yelled "Fucking pig!" out the window as the officer walked back to his car. FML

#21216216
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28634) - you deserved it (19948)

On 07/21/2014 at 11:58am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my fiancée has been saying, "Shit's gone cray-cray" for over a week. I finally snapped. When I was done ranting, she murmured, "Baby, don't be cray-cray". FML

#21204913
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45140) - you deserved it (7833)

On 07/10/2014 at 9:34am - love - by oh my fucking god (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, my road rage got so out of hand that I'm now actually inclined to honk obnoxiously at my computer when it's being slow. FML

#21204164
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28483) - you deserved it (14730)

On 07/09/2014 at 4:49pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I almost got fired from work because a customer complained that I "threw up gang signs" at him. I was blocking the sun from my eyes. FML

#21202372
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41004) - you deserved it (2989)

On 07/08/2014 at 12:26am - work - by MaddyN - United States (Oregon)

Today, a girl I recently slept with messaged me, explaining through a rendition of "Call Me Maybe" that she'd given me chlamydia. FML

#21199713
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45663) - you deserved it (14118)

On 07/05/2014 at 4:19pm - health - by Rowansgonnarow -

Today, I came home and found that my home had been robbed. The worst part? One of the thieves took a dump in my toilet and didn't flush. It doesn't even look human. FML

#21184110
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44932) - you deserved it (3476)

On 06/22/2014 at 11:10am - misc - by paywithpoop - United States

Today, I became the town racist for saying "black" instead of "African-American". I'm black. FML

#21179835
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54324) - you deserved it (5055)

On 06/18/2014 at 9:14pm - misc - by guest - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't think he should marry me, because I have kids. They're his kids. FML

#21055090
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52698) - you deserved it (6889)

On 02/09/2014 at 2:20am - love - by Tara115 (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boss' son is training to take over my job as head translator, after having convinced his dad that he's fluent in Spanish, and that my skills suck. I soon walked in on him using Google Translate on a legal document. My boss refuses to believe me. FML

#20898132
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44213) - you deserved it (2640)

On 09/27/2013 at 3:41pm - work - by anahira6 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I brought my Japanese girlfriend home for dinner with my family for the first time. They all got drunk and made heaps of racist jokes right in front of us. My dad forgot her name and started calling her "Rice Ball" instead. FML

#20858245
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55721) - you deserved it (4414)

On 08/28/2013 at 6:35pm - love - by Thanks everyone (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, while training a new employee, I had to run after a naked guy chasing a hooker at the hotel I work at. I made him go back to his room, while she offered me a good time for 300 bucks. The trainee left and hasn't come back yet. FML

#20849812
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38449) - you deserved it (2726)

On 08/22/2013 at 7:50pm - work - by Awkward - United States

Today, I was visiting my cousin's farm. Going out for a morning stroll, I took an apple with me to munch along the way. As I was eating it, I heard a distant thumping sound and was suddenly slammed into the ground. When I looked up, a horse was eating my apple. I got mugged by a horse. FML

#20836718
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54104) - you deserved it (6153)

On 08/14/2013 at 5:11am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I met the most beautiful girl I've ever seen on the beach. I was nervous, but I just smiled and said, "Hey, you're really pretty." Then I let out a horrific fart. FML

#20816798
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50180) - you deserved it (10628)

On 08/02/2013 at 9:58am - misc - by YouSoSmelly (man) - United States (North Carolina)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: