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cyanidesandwich

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cyanidesandwich

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 8 November 1996 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2981
  • Number of comments : 231
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 24 posted

About cyanidesandwich : I am an awesome guy to be around, i love this site and play some if Kixeye's facebook games in my spare time. I am also proud to say that i have seen both two girls one cup and the BME Pain olympics back to back. ( the first didnt bother me at all, but the second was kind of hard to watch)

cyanidesandwich's page activity

Visits<b>YouMadBra</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 9:40am<b>KidBro</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 8:37pm<b>Rachel124</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 8:39am<b>jvfelicio</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 12:36am<b>triplebeerox</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 6:49pm<b>that_random_twin</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 5:46pm<b>tagallopes</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 2:21pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 6:44pm<b>mattandkim95</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 11:13pm<b>CrazyZebra</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 1:18am<b>theark95</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 10:54am<b>halloweentree</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 9:41pm<b>a_wiener_d0g</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 5:45pm<b>arrowhead235</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 2:31pm<b>xDochx</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 2:17pm<b>papashaan</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 3:29pm<b>monsterbeats</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 12:09pm<b>fitts6</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 4:05am

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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cyanidesandwich's favorite FMLs

Today, I was walking to the store when I ran into one of my friends. He said he heard about my bike being stolen the day before, and that whoever took it was a heartless dick. I hadn't told anyone about the theft. FML

#17231826
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40811) - you deserved it (2781)

On 07/23/2011 at 5:27pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, a group of girl-scouts came to my door selling chocolate bars. I bought 2 bars and smiled as they left, thinking I'd done a good deed. When the door closed, I heard one of the girls say, "Told you, the fat bitches always wanna buy from us." FML

#17172932
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40991) - you deserved it (6282)

On 07/19/2011 at 2:24am - kids - by hatemylife - United States (New York)

Today, my house got robbed. They left a note: "Next time, we steal your souls." FML

#17156963
340 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37277) - you deserved it (3287)

On 07/18/2011 at 12:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, my house got robbed. They left a note: "Next time, we steal your souls." FML

#17156963
340 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37277) - you deserved it (3287)

On 07/18/2011 at 12:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, my husband and I had just got over a big argument, and I asked him to cut me some cucumbers for my eyes to help me relax. I was laying down, eyed closed, and he set them on my eyes. They weren't cucumbers, they were lemons. FML

#16304417
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21134) - you deserved it (42352)

On 05/22/2011 at 9:58pm - misc - by lemonhead -

Today, I called my mom and I got voicemail: "Hello, this is Joyce. I'm not here at the moment, so leave a message and I will call back as soon as possible. Except if it's Sophie. If it is, get the hell out of my life, biiitch." I'm Sophie. FML

#16277125
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39508) - you deserved it (5207)

On 05/21/2011 at 2:42am - misc - by thatsasquee - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I woke up needing to wee. I was at my boyfriend's and didn't want to wake him, so I sat on the edge of the toilet and peed as quietly as possible. I realised after that I'd sat too far over and had peed on the floor. There was no loo paper. FML

#16267774
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11431) - you deserved it (37380)

On 05/20/2011 at 3:05pm - misc - by lionhead14 (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, while driving, a minivan cut me off. Pissed, I started honking and cursing. I then went ballistic when the driver waved out the window, smiling. It wasn't until I was at a stoplight that I noticed their "Honk if you love Jesus" bumper sticker. FML

#16263941
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26462) - you deserved it (14153)

On 05/20/2011 at 6:07am - misc - by Max Flynn -

Today, I got circumcised by my zipper. FML

#16205540
343 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61855) - you deserved it (9672)

On 05/16/2011 at 12:33pm - health - by Bobby M - Ireland (Carlow)

Today, as a prank, a friend and I tied a 10 dollar bill to a fishing line, and yanked it away from people as they reached for it. It was going really well until one of our victims pulled a knife and chased us around the block. FML

#16144015
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13334) - you deserved it (52984)

On 05/12/2011 at 1:53pm - misc - by Jackassed - United States (New York)

Today, I puked up a centipede. FML

#16126004
249 comments

Today, having turned 18, I was eager to show my mother some of the clothes I'd like to purchase with my birthday money. I flipped my laptop open only to realise I had left a "Big Latina Booty gets a fat one" window open. Her howling screams of pleasure echoed through my kitchen. FML

#16074880
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13008) - you deserved it (56197)

On 05/07/2011 at 2:08am - intimacy - by Anon (man) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, I dreamed that I was kidnapped by Charlie Sheen. FML

#15912541
302 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31035) - you deserved it (11505)

On 04/24/2011 at 9:10pm - misc - by woahitbechels - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was taking a crap in a public stall when three kids broke down the door and pelted me with eggs. FML

#15846054
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46242) - you deserved it (5688)

On 04/19/2011 at 11:06am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I was in IKEA when my friends and I thought it would be fun to play hide and seek. We all hid; I was in a good hiding spot. Half an hour later, I was still there. I texted my friends to see where they were. They all left to see a movie, and forgot about me. FML

#15616654
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33489) - you deserved it (11810)

On 04/03/2011 at 3:11am - misc - by Nicole - United States



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