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cyanidesandwich

Offline (the 01/21/2014 at 6:02pm) | Search for a member

cyanidesandwich

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 8 November 1996 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2758
  • Number of comments : 226
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 22 posted

About cyanidesandwich : I am an awesome guy to be around, i love this site and play some if Kixeye's facebook games in my spare time. I am also proud to say that i have seen both two girls one cup and the BME Pain olympics back to back. ( the first didnt bother me at all, but the second was kind of hard to watch)

cyanidesandwich's page activity

Visits<b>papashaan</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 3:29pm<b>monsterbeats</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 12:09pm<b>fitts6</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 4:05am<b>KIABlackWolves</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 12:02am<b>TheThirdi</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 8:00pm<b>staaacey</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 12:29am<b>sweetbliss3</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 11:12pm<b>MzZombicidal</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 9:29pm<b>john_smth</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 10:34am<b>adamant84</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 2:42pm<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 10:45am<b>ss521</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 7:27pm<b>BunnyDreams</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 1:48pm<b>JBChristian</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 1:38am<b>Kyra1</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 11:38pm<b>chris1045</b> - the 05/24/2014 at 4:08am<b>thisguy184</b> - the 05/20/2014 at 12:09am<b>klaralynn</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 8:59pm

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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cyanidesandwich's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up needing to wee. I was at my boyfriend's and didn't want to wake him, so I sat on the edge of the toilet and peed as quietly as possible. I realised after that I'd sat too far over and had peed on the floor. There was no loo paper. FML

#16267774
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10512) - you deserved it (35510)

On 05/20/2011 at 3:05pm - misc - by lionhead14 (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, while driving, a minivan cut me off. Pissed, I started honking and cursing. I then went ballistic when the driver waved out the window, smiling. It wasn't until I was at a stoplight that I noticed their "Honk if you love Jesus" bumper sticker. FML

#16263941
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23504) - you deserved it (13157)

On 05/20/2011 at 6:07am - misc - by Max Flynn -

Today, I got circumcised by my zipper. FML

#16205540
342 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59563) - you deserved it (9372)

On 05/16/2011 at 12:33pm - health - by Bobby M - Ireland (Carlow)

Today, as a prank, a friend and I tied a 10 dollar bill to a fishing line, and yanked it away from people as they reached for it. It was going really well until one of our victims pulled a knife and chased us around the block. FML

#16144015
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11916) - you deserved it (49560)

On 05/12/2011 at 1:53pm - misc - by Jackassed - United States (New York)

Today, I puked up a centipede. FML

#16126004
249 comments

Today, having turned 18, I was eager to show my mother some of the clothes I'd like to purchase with my birthday money. I flipped my laptop open only to realise I had left a "Big Latina Booty gets a fat one" window open. Her howling screams of pleasure echoed through my kitchen. FML

#16074880
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10919) - you deserved it (51389)

On 05/07/2011 at 2:08am - intimacy - by Anon (man) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, I dreamed that I was kidnapped by Charlie Sheen. FML

#15912541
302 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28699) - you deserved it (10857)

On 04/24/2011 at 9:10pm - misc - by woahitbechels - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was taking a crap in a public stall when three kids broke down the door and pelted me with eggs. FML

#15846054
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43646) - you deserved it (5473)

On 04/19/2011 at 11:06am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I was in IKEA when my friends and I thought it would be fun to play hide and seek. We all hid; I was in a good hiding spot. Half an hour later, I was still there. I texted my friends to see where they were. They all left to see a movie, and forgot about me. FML

#15616654
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32275) - you deserved it (11524)

On 04/03/2011 at 3:11am - misc - by Nicole - United States

Today, I attended a funeral. During the minute of silence, my phone went off. My ringtone is "It's good to be alive". FML

#15616538
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16488) - you deserved it (41753)

On 04/03/2011 at 3:02am - misc - by JJMan217 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I discovered that my girlfriend can only orgasm when we have sex to gospel music. FML

#15613942
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48678) - you deserved it (5782)

On 04/03/2011 at 12:10am - intimacy - by cantgetup (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed together, and I was in a snuggly mood. I rolled over to gaze lovingly into his eyes and whisper sweet nothings to him in the darkness. His response? "Dear God! Did somebody fart in your mouth?!" FML

#15583575
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23553) - you deserved it (30438)

On 04/01/2011 at 12:32am - love - by Anonymous - United States

TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML

#15415559
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35873) - you deserved it (30918)

On 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)

Today, I finally got a reply to the letter to a celebrity that I had to write for my English class. It was a restraining order. FML

#14908129
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25145) - you deserved it (5638)

On 02/09/2011 at 10:53am - misc - by PrestonW -

Today, I saw Saw IV with my boyfriend. He held me close and said, "I'll protect you." A few seconds later, he jumped up so violently, he gave me a bloody nose, and ran screaming out of the room. FML

#14248345
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29338) - you deserved it (3402)

On 12/18/2010 at 2:14pm - love - by asdfghjkl (woman) - United States (Connecticut)



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