About curlyfry33 : If you eat yourself then would you become twice your size or just disappear?
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I agree, their lives suck
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curlyfry33's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 09/12/2012 at 8:26pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love
Today, I found my husband's journal, and along with it the real reason he took so long to show up to our wedding rehearsals last year. According to the journal, it was because he was too busy wooing a married mother of five and sticking his "slut-banger all up in that fat booty." FML
by divorce? i think so / 07/20/2012 at 10:12pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 06/20/2012 at 7:08pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health
Today, I decided to motivate myself to workout by looking at a picture of a guy with a six-pack on my computer screen while doing abs. My dad walked in after I finished and was still breathing heavily from working out. FML
by NotGay / 06/16/2012 at 1:45am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML
by 16590 / 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm / Sweden / Transportation
by sickness_sucks / 06/15/2012 at 2:19am / Canada (British Columbia) / Health
by Scared / 06/04/2012 at 8:54pm / United States (Virginia) / Animals
by Anonymous / 06/01/2012 at 10:29am / Austria (Wien) / Miscellaneous
by catherineratley / 05/06/2012 at 12:09am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation
by foshizzle / 04/25/2012 at 2:46am / United States (Florida) / Work
Today, I locked my car. I put the key in my bag when suddenly my car began to roll backwards. I tried to get the key out of my bag but couldn't find it, and with the other hand I tried to stop the car. The worst thing was that some dumbass was watching me and didn't help. FML
by rabbitoncocaine / 04/20/2012 at 2:41am / Germany (Thuringen) / Transportation
by Scabby / 04/11/2012 at 5:53am / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Health
by DarkDolly / 02/04/2012 at 11:39am / France / Transportation
by Anonymous / 01/25/2012 at 11:18pm / United States (Texas) / Kids
by JellitonOctopus / 01/24/2012 at 11:51pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
- Today, after discovering that our son is already sexually active, I asked my husband to have a talk… Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, and I said something grammatically wrong during it. He… Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. Halfway through he asked me what day it was. I told him,…