crzyshpper210

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Crzyshpper210's favorite FMLs

By fuckmeitsgettingworse - 24/02/2014 19:36 - United Kingdom - Derby

Today, my pregnant wife's parents called me at work, saying she'd been crying inconsolably and wouldn't say what was wrong. After pleading with my boss, I rushed home. Turns out there was an "ugly" sofa in a TV ad and she felt it was "picking on ugly sofas". FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 476

You deserved it 4 639

By sabz21 - 27/01/2014 04:37 - United States - Naugatuck

Today, as a priest's helper in church, I was giving Communion. It took me three people to realize that every time I was giving them the Eucharist, I was saying, "May the force be with you". FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 142

You deserved it 14 278

By Annonymous_Dad - 01/05/2013 23:22 - United States - Fort Wayne

Today, the neighbors in the next apartment reported me to the police for screaming at my newborn to "shut the hell up" every time he cries. I would never yell at my baby. My asshole of a dog on the other hand barks at everything, which terrifies the baby, causing him to cry. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 828

You deserved it 6 072

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Annonymous_Dad 4

Thursday 2 May 2013 15:05

My dog IS trained. Generally, he just needs to be told "heel" or "quiet" and he obeys. However, ever since the baby has come home ( 3 weeks) hes gone into super protective mode. A car door slams and hes "killer guard dog". Its getting ridiculous and I do get exasperated when it happens multiple times within a half hour. He DOES listen when I yell, because its not something I have ever done with him. Afterwards, however, we go through the "heel" command and give treats. He just hasnt settled down yet! Maybe Ill just start yelling "Heel Killer!!" ( totally kidding, calm down, no more yelling for me)

By nicki - 14/11/2010 17:18 - United States

Today, it took me a full ten minutes to finish on the toilet. I was babysitting at the time, and it took the kids those ten minutes to destroy the kitchen and shave the cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 447

You deserved it 8 125